running into a relationship?

[moonriverlove]

So I am dating with this guy for one month. Everything is so great, he is very into me, asking me out, trying to know more about me, taking care of me. There is so much chemistry between us.We began to hold hands and kiss each other since last week, both of us feel so good and so in love...

But, he never mentioned the word " relationship" or " girlfriend" sth, neither do I. I feel kinda of insecure because I am not sure he wants a serious relationship or just dating.. I didn't ask because I don't want to scare him. What should I do? Do people just default that they are in a relationship without saying anything?? I am so confused...

[lesa]

But, he never mentioned the word " relationship" or " girlfriend" sth, neither do I. I feel kinda of insecure because I am not sure he wants a serious relationship or just dating.. I didn't ask because I don't want to scare him. What should I do? Do people just default that they are in a relationship without saying anything?? I am so confused...

No, NEVER assume that you are in a relationship. I find that it is better to discuss your desire for a serious relationship and that you will only continue to date if there is a potential for a serious relatiohship. It may be uncomfortable but you need to know sooner rather than later. Don't worry about scaring him. You are just letting him know that you desire a serious relationship but you are not telling him that it must be him and it must be now....just a strong potential and you will decide if he is the one you like to have that serious relationship with at another time.

[bluesummer]

Honestly, it's only been one month.....you need to calm down and just give things a little more time. I don't think the words 'gf/bf' or 'relationship' ever come up in my vocabulary with someone I'm dating for at least a couple months. Minimum.

This relationship is still very very young....just have fun with it, and don't get too serious about it. If, in a couple months, you still haven't discussed the status of your relationship, bring it up. Doing it too soon will only make you appear clingy and needy.

[Mish]

Honestly, it's only been one month.....you need to calm down and just give things a little more time. I don't think the words 'gf/bf' or 'relationship' ever come up in my vocabulary with someone I'm dating for at least a couple months. Minimum.

This relationship is still very very young....just have fun with it, and don't get too serious about it. If, in a couple months, you still haven't discussed the status of your relationship, bring it up. Doing it too soon will only make you appear clingy and needy.

I agree, give it more time. Slowly, with time as you feel more comfortable in this relationship it will become natural. Usually what happens when you start seeing each other's friends the words bf /gf / relationship start to get passed around it won't be long until both of you are all good with that

[moonriverlove]

thanks guys.

what about already having sex but without mentioning the relationship thing..

will things be different?

[vashti]

NOOO!! Don't have sex without the discussion if it is important to you to be in a relationship. Too much potential for disaster, and why settle for less than you want?

I'm with Lisa on this: I don't see anything wrong with asking this guy "so, are you dating other girls, or what? Because I'm not sure how serious I should be taking things at this point."

He will answer you.

[moonriverlove]

so,i already talked to him about this thing seriously. it turns out that he thought we were still dating.. not ready for the relationship thing right now because he may be move to another city several months later.. he said we hadn't defined it as a relationship because there were so much uncertainties.. the thing is we already have sex, which is too bad ( i really don't know what to do right now.. both of us can feel the chemistry is pretty strong.

[moonriverlove]

please ~~~

[Mish]

so,i already talked to him about this thing seriously. it turns out that he thought we were still dating.. not ready for the relationship thing right now because he may be move to another city several months later...

Well, I think this pretty much sums it up. It looks like he's not ready for a relationship with you.

What will you do?