What do you feel is the best thing to do? :-)

[soulful]

Hi n thanks for reading
I go dancing - Modern Jive- (its got a big social scene in the UK)

Me a nd my friends travelled to this 'Weekender'. I saw this lass and danced with her on Saturday evening and saw her on Sunday as well. Chatted with her and danced as well. To be honest we had a 'connection'.We chatted outwith the dancing and whilst dancing. I enjoyed dancing with her and I know she really enjoyed dancing with me. She said she would see me at this venue later. I turned up and saw her sitting. I went to sit with pals from Aberdeen. I was waiting for a good enough song to come on before I went over to ask her to dance again. Then she was gone. Oh well. She did say she was working the next day and she told me she would be leaving early (1am). She told me she was on the Saturday when we were dancing (and speaking about music and stuff in general :-) that she was on Facebook.

So, we (me and my friends I was driving down with) got home on Monday evening. I found her on facebook and did the "will you be my friend thing". On Tuesday evening when I was on facebook she accepted and we got chatting. I told her via the chat option that I would need to go as my supper was on however I would be home about 9.30 and if she was in then we could chat. She responded saying that she was going out for a meal with a customer regards her work. So, I goes out for the evening comes back, goes on facebook speaking to someone else and she comes on. So, we get chatting.

I told her on Saturday that I was going to be made redundant soon. I know, not the most interesting subject to talk about eh. honest though. So she asks me how that was going. I told her (by this time it was around about midnight) I ended up saying to her "enough of this boring stuff....what about your job". She briefly told me, then said "she was tired and had to go to bed.night night"

That chat was on Tuesday evening. Today is Thursday.

Im hoping that anyone or people can help me to tap into a bit of courage and confidence, to play it cool and at the same time be forward. If you could gives a bit of advice. MAGIC :-) I spoke to a good friend and he said "just play it cool.......just say to her something like, "I really enjoyed dancing with you at the weekend and speaking to you.......would be good if we could do it again sometime..."

As I have said it was a dance event that we met at. These 'weekenders' are held regularly throughout the year. I have signed up to do another in a months time, however, I cant remember if she is going or not. That doesnt make that much difference. The fact is I would like to see her again! She stays in England and I stay in Scotland. Probably a 2 hour flight :-)

I have never been that great at putting myself forward and letting someone know I like them.A bit of perfectionsim :-) and a little fear of rejection :-) A bit about her that i know. She is the same age as me. She is a very active girl, scuba diving, hillwalking etc. She also seems to work in quite a high flying job. Now this is bringing up a bit of insecurity in me. Q. am I/would I be exciting enough for her? (Mmm? I go dancing. She has been dancing a year, and me 5 years. I know she definetely liked dancing with me....also I did a parachute jump 3 times about 3 years ago, so when it comes to "exciting stuff" I could tell her that eh :-) Q. will I be charming enough for her? Q. with her being in a job and me away to be made redundant, would she be interested in me?

Mmmm. The thing is, I have done this before, where I have put external factors on my self worth and as a result I deny myself the possible opportunity that a connection is waiting and is ready to be made. However, my mind set will not attract it, or will make it not so easy for something to happen. I would love to get into a mind set where I am saying "screw those factors.......I am good enough as me.......".

So, a long thread, but hey, a worthwhile one, in that even if no responds (which i honestly hope they do, as it really does make a difference) then at least I have got a bit of perspective.

Not exactly sure what to say, or how to play it. If anyone has got any good advice as to how to approach this, great.

If you have read this far you are a star...Thankyou ...HUGS :-)

[Gigabitch]

Man up and call her. Ask her if she's going to the next weekender. You really have nothing to lose. Believe ma, later in life you'll want to go back and smack yourself for being such a baby about putting yourself out there. It's ALWAYS worth it.