Heeelp someone, please!
Being with someone for 4 years, means u know him better than u should..Unless u r stuck with a psyco-two-faced maniac! My crazy bf broke up with me (again), and then called to say he wants me, we won't break up, he loves me..blah blah blah. He can't decide if he wants me in his life? And he's supposed to be the mature one
Serously now, I'm his x-student, his friend, his lover, his secretary (without salary of course!), my wildest dream is to be also the mother of his child, I don't want marriage or anything, and I don't mind his seing other women, i obey his every command, and he plays with my feelings like crazy. I'm really addicted to him and i d do anything for him.
In a few days, in Halloween actually,we happen to have a 4-year anniversary. For some reason this freaked him out. He says we r together for too long, it's enough, that I should find a boy of my own age, that he won't commit, he has no time for love in his messed up life etc. Do u think he says these cause he needs reasurance? I made it clear that I don't want commitment, that I don't mind if he cheats, abuses or neglects me, that i don't want to be 'normal' for society. All I want is to be with him. Under whatever terms he desires.
When we go out i pay for what I spend, so he has realised i have no 'interest' to be with him, and keeps telling me to get away, that i m stuck cause he s my first. Not because he deserves love. His first wife was the only one he stayed a long time with. Other girlfriends lasted for a few months and he's convinced we all women r maneaters! His x-es have hurt him a lot. But he's too much of a macho man to feel intimidated by a 24-year-old who worships him like a god.
I'm very confused. Sometimes he treats me bad and tells me to leave him. I do. I leave him alone but then he calls back and says he misses me and I'm all he has. What's going on? Does this mean he considers me 'better than loneliness' or he feels pity for hurting me with a break up? On the other hand, he's a weird person who has no friends, hates crowds and likes isolation. And hurting me isn't a problem, he's doing it all the time and I'm starting to like his sadistic nature!
Can anyone understand? He's sending many different vibes. When he doesn't go crazy over getting rid of me or keeping me, he asks me a lot of questions about my views on marriage, kids, baby names, if and how I'd like to marry and where, details about raising a child etc.
He wants to commit or break up? Why do we even have to start a new phase and not stay as we r? 4 years is a long time, i know, but i m happy the way things r, im afraid to change sth. And I don't understand. Whatever he wants i'll accept. And he knows all I want is his satisfaction. But what is it that he wants after all?