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Thread: My girlfriend is moving back to Korea in 6 months... stay with her or end it now?

  1. #1
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    My girlfriend is moving back to Korea in 6 months... stay with her or end it now?

    We met back in February and started going out in March. We spent Spring Break together, literally glued to eachother. I went home for a day, couldn't stand to be away, so went back a few hours later and spent 4 more days in her house.

    As far as our relationship goes... it's been great. I have never felt so comfortable and natural with someone. We get along famously. The sex is phenomenal and intense. I have a strange fetish, but when I'm with her I find I don't even need it to be satisfied. She is enough for me. She is a dream girl, very easy going, no drama. A little quiet, but when she laughs her face lights up and everything is right with the world. And I dare say, foolishly, that in the short time together I have developed very strong feelings for her. I recognize these feelings. I am falling in love.

    Everything got messed up when she went on a 3-week trip to Korea to visit her family. Now I don't blame her or fault her in the slightest for this. While she was there she realized how important family is, and how much she misses her family and how much they miss her. She has taken a look at her education (we're both student nurses) and is doubting that nursing is the career for her. She said that, other than me, she really has nothing here in the US.

    She's making arrangements to move home. Permanently. She's in NYC now to to stay with her sister and work. She is, probably, going to be spending 1 more semester here to finish a General Studies AS. That would put her departure in January. January comes, and she is gone. Forever.

    My question to you all is this:

    Is it really "better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all"? If I leave her now, I suffer some heartache and some crying, but I spare myself the big hit in January. I also leave her even more alone while she finishes her degree, and sacrifice all the memories and times we could share until then. If I stay with her, I can support her and encourage her and keep her from feeling so lonely, and make memories with her... but I know that I will grow more and more attached to her, and when she leaves, it will hurt massively.

    My friends and family all say that I am a fool for wanting to stay with her while she's here. My more uncouth male friends say "hit it and quit it". My female friends say "it's not practical". I want a 2nd opinion guys. I know that, if she's down for it, I will stay with her, and spend every moment I can with her. I just want to hear your thoughts on it, no matter how harsh.

    Live with the heartache of loved lost, or live with the heartache of "what if"?

    tl;dr: Falling in love with my Korean girlfriend, but she's moving back to Korea in 6 months. Should I stay with her and build happy memories and accept the inevitable heartache in the end, or let her go now and accept the inevitable heartache of regret after she leaves?

  2. #2
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    I'd cut my losses now if I were you. Neither of you cares about the other so strongly that you'd move for the other - so you may as well end it.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

  3. #3
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    Your infatuated by her-this is the honeymoon period which will fade in the next 6 months. Then that fetish you mentioned may become very important. Just said I would point that out. During the honeymoon period-most people are willing to make sacrifices for the other without really considering the consequences

    Anyway I wouldn't waste my time on something that I know can never work long term. if there is no chance of either of you moving permanently to be together than I would end it now

  4. #4
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    Both of the above ladies are right. She's willing to leave and you're not willing to follow, so why waste your time, and make it worse?

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by HeartIsAching View Post
    Both of the above ladies are right. She's willing to leave and you're not willing to follow, so why waste your time, and make it worse?
    Yes. But there's six months quality shagging time left.

  6. #6
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    Thanks for the responses guys. Very contrast to what I got from reddit.

  7. #7
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    Do what you want. Either way, it'll hurt for awhile but it will be fine someday, somehow. Personally, I'd stay rather than regretting something. If it's infatuation, it'll pass and 6 months is not too long of a waste. Actually nothing is a waste as you'll get experience from it.
    So maybe get a quiet time for yourself and really ask yourself which is better? Not other people opinion, but your own.
    To stay might be hard, but if you decide to stay please don't focus on the fact that she'll be gone. Instead, focus on the time you are spending together.
    In hindsight, every relationship is like that no? There'll be time to part, sometimes you don't know when, but hey we can only live moment by moment.

  8. #8
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    Thanks guys.

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