Why did he pull away ?

[DaDrought]

Posting for a friend possible trigger inside so please forgive also no very fluent in English


I have a friend....I'll just call her A and she likes a guy X. They known each other for awhile now X was really into A always calling, texting her, taking her to dinners etc but A just wasn't sure about a boyfriend at that time in her life. After some time A told me that she decided she might finally want to give her and X a try I hinted this to X he seemed generally happy so I got him to ask A out to dinner so they could talk. The next day A looked very sad and confused I asked her what was wrong and A said the dinner didn't go the way she had hoped. A told me that sex came up in there convo and A told X about her past relationships. After that X started avoiding A out of nowhere for days now (and isn't like him he always gives A an morning text and tries to make plans with her fairly often) so I did some digging and found out X got back from a trip with his friends (he doesn't know that like 80% of his "friends" are childhood friends of mine lol) and that he has been spending a lot of time with this girl that went as well...will call her B. I did some more research and B some girl from X's hometown and (apparently X has been holding hands with B,talking with her a lot even were kissing once etc). A has been very upset and crying all day and keeps saying stuff like she wishes she wasn't such a slut in her past (she thinks it was her number that intimated X ) I've been trying to cheer her up for awhile now and begged her not to say such things..... X and A were finally gonna get together and suddenly this b!%$h comes from nowhere hasn't seen X in 3 years probably and pretty much steals X from A

Why did he pull away

Was he just a wimp because of her number of partners ?

[smackie09]

That would be your friend's assessment. Yes there are guys who don't like girls with a sexual past. It is what it is. He had made the decision to move on that night, for that reason maybe.

As for girl B, she didn't steal him away. X made the conscious choice to be with someone he fancies. It's normal, and that is just the way life is.

Your friend needs to meet someone who care not about numbers. IMO, it's no one's business, and she doesn't have to give any real details to anyone she is dating. Asking for numbers is childish, so she dodged a bullet on this one.

[bunnyhabit]

it is very dangerous discussing past relations with a potential partner. i am sure in X mind A was assumed virginal. so he was shocked beyond belief when she qouted an impressive scoring board in her past. B is probably smart enough to act shy and virginal with X. all guys get excited about being the first to pop a chicks cherry and brag about to buddies. i believe X is no longer interested in A due to her confession and is focused on B in hopes she is a virgin. after he bags B virginity he may rekindle a relationship with A but highly doubtful given her track record with many guys.

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[MENTION=87417]smackie09[/MENTION] how did A "dodge a bullet"? seems she committed suicide with her confession of a huge sexual history.

[smackie09]

No she didn't. Why should she lie to manipulate getting a guy that would give her nothing but grief about her numbers? Now you have a relationship based on lies. He is too quick to judge when the OP probably would be a loyal/honest GF and that is also great in the sack.

[bunnyhabit]

i agree [MENTION=87417]smackie09[/MENTION]. she was too honest. if she has a high count that is a strong hint that she is a great poa. guys brag about hot girls to friends that go after her resulting in a high count of past lovers.

[smackie09]

Some guys don't care...my husband didn't. All the guys I dated didn't care or didn't bother to ask. The only time I have ever heard of it being a problem is on these advice sites. It boggles the mind actually. And my high count didn't result in any of my BF's friends chasing me down for a lay. I was turned down for a relationship once only because I smoked cigarettes, never about my high number of lovers. She needs to meet someone that isn't so closed minded. Women shouldn't be limited in what they do because of some people's opinion. The freedom to have sex as much as you choose isn't a dirty thing. She shouldn't be shamed into covering it up.