bf been texing old gf ALOT HELP

[mare]

He is a nice guy, pimp? No, he just has never had trouble getting girls. They have always been after him, and his older brother. They both just have that way about them. What is funny is that both guys got serious about the same type of girl. Bobby (older brother) has been dating Megan for about 3 years now, same type of girl, parents a bit strict, she was nice though. I liked her. They were not around to much, Bobby moved out.

I just think it is odd, that of all the girls Jon has messed around with, they have ALL been, well experienced. I mean I remember when we were sophmores, he was dating a freshmen girl from college, he was always with the 'bad' girls, never one to be jelous of any of them.

Then she comes along, miss innocent and he is head over heals in love with her. I dont get that. That is so old fashioned. I would think he would prefer someone who knows what to do. I just don't get guys at all.

I sat with him at lunch today, well at the same table we all sit at, it was awkward. He was nice. Not like before, but he was not ignoring me or anything, it was odd, but time will settle this all down. I realize he has been hers for a long time. I hope she knows how lucky she is. He is a good guy.

I found out alot of his friends know her and that irritates me. They ALL knew he was seeing her behind my back. The first weekend of hunting, (2 weeks ago) all the 'guys' went up to some hunting lodge, and SHE was there with his mom and dad, she had to stay in their cabin,But his parents, I mean even his mom and dad knew about her!! They had her staying with them. Oh well. Enough about him. I neve had him.

Like I said earlier, I will never have sex so soon again. I want a guy to care for me like he does her, I want someone to love, really love.

[falcon]

heres a solution. without telling jon, somehow manage to get the other girls number. confront her. let her know what shes doing to your relationship. see how she reacts. if she doesn't care, kick her ass.

[Rosebud]

Falcon that was just plain bad information! I know it's your opnion but that's a very immature way of handling a situation! There's no need to call anyone up to cause any problems. What's done is done and she should leave the situation alone and move on like the bigger person she should be.

[aloha22]

Ya, a few years ago, about two weeks after we had broken up, my ex's new girlfriend decided to call me. It just made me realize that he had picked the less mature of us. Don't get involved with her.

[mare]

I have her number, but there is NO way I would confront her on anything. She did nothing to me at all. It was him. He owed me the truth about how he felt about her, he was the one who should have not kept me hanging on, just for sex, yea, I know it, I was a fool. BUT I did not know about her at all.

I would look like an ass if I did that. I am going to take the high road as much as I can. I have survived breakups before and I can do it again. Its just that this was so sudden for me.

I saw them tonight at the gas station. He said Hi, she just smiled and I walked away. It was killing me, but not as bad as I thought it would. I knew I would see them eventually, and I did, and I survived. I don't really hate her. I don't even hate him. I just feel stupid for the way I CHASED him, I will never do that again. Of course he eventaully caved, I practically threw myself in his bed for gods sake. What guy wouldnt say no (Ho bag right HA HA HA) But I am trying to learn from this.

I am going to let this die down, oh sure right now our big break up is the talk of my school, but oh well, next week or the week after it will be something else. I am not going to prolong it by making a complete fool of myself. Even though I would love to rub it in to her that while he was wooing her, we were having sex the whole time. But, I don't think that is anything to brag about. It would just make me look worse.

Oh well, I have been talking to my sisters all night, (mom wouldnt let me go with my friends cause of Thanksgiving) they are so right. My oldest sister said just let it go, and she is right. She is the one who is really helping me here. I don't talk to much to my friends about it, cuz I know it is best to keep this in my family.

But am I jelous? Hell yea, He was fun to make out with. I LOVED being with him, it was soooo romantic, he is so smooth and gentle and loving one time, then he could be rough and wild the next. That was cool. I did learn alot about sex with him that is for sure. I still don't get why he wants a naive very protected girl. I don't get that at all.

But, and I will say this again, I AM FINE, jelous, yea, sad, yea, am I dying NOPE, I will get over this. I am glad my sisters are home this weekend. They are being great. They both thought he was hot as hell, but they both said he and I were not a great fit. They said to be cool and maybe someday we would be friends. So what ever.

[mare]

Wow, I just re read this. It has been almost 7 weeks since Jon and I broke up. Yes, he is with Nikki. I see them driving around once in a while. I am doing fine.

Then last Saturday we were all at the same party. He is still as handsome as ever, and her? She is beautiful, all the guys think she is sooo hot. At first I was real jelous, then I talked to her, she is funny and not at all what I expected. She is pretty cool really. We had a nice fun talk. I thought she was going to be miss prissy, miss goody two shoes, not at all. She was fun.

What was kind of hard on me was the way Jon is with her. I know him pretty well, and he cant take his eyes off of her, he is way more attentive to her than he ever was with me, they seem to just fit. If that makes sense. They look good together, they really do. I talked with him for a bit, he was nice as usual. But he was always glancing at her (she was acrross the room) , I noticed that ALL night he just kind of looks at her all the time. She is just beautiful, but not all made up, its like how does she do that? He hair is killer, her face is just amazing. She is not a skinny minnie, but she sure has a nice body on her. The guys all think she has the hottest ass, they all think Jon is sooooo lucky. I think she is the lucky one.

So, what ever, I had a twinge of jelousy, and still do, BUT she was nice, he was nice and I have moved on. I did try texing him a few times, he did not tex back. He did ask me once at school what I needed. I miss him alot at times. Sometimes I see him here or there, and its like, wow, he is soooo cute.

I hope I find someone to love me the way he obviously loves her. And I mean he is head over heals in love with her, you can just see it, you can feel it. The way he looks at her, it is like wow. I want that someday.

[Tone]

I hope I find someone to love me the way he obviously loves her. And I mean he is head over heals in love with her, you can just see it, you can feel it. The way he looks at her, it is like wow. I want that someday.

And someday, you'll get just that.

[clynn]

you sound much better now. I think you are a very strong person to be able to go to parties where they both are. This will make you even stronger and I think that it will help you grow as a person. Good for you, that would be hard for anyone.

(the good thing about getting out of school is that your world is generally less "closed" - and you don't have to see faces over and over......However, in school - you learn how to deal with those situations....and flourish in spite of them).

[mare]

I am doing much, much better. I read this whole thread and was kind of sad. I was so hurt that day, well for a few days after all that I was a mess. But I am doing fine now, I have gone out with another guy a couple of times, nothing major, movies etc. but I have tosay, he will always be the one who got away.

The funny thing realy is, I LIKE her. She was so fun to hang with. At first it was awkward, then we both kind of laughed it off and started talking about all kinds of things. She was so freaken funny! She does not drink, does not smoke, I love the way she dresses. But do I want to copy her? No, I couldnt pull it off anyway and It would be dumb. So, are we going to friends? no, not realy, but I am sure we will say hi and talk when we see each other.

In some ways SHE helped me figure out who I want to be. I want the repect and a love like she has (oh, BTW, he gave her a 3/4 carrot diamond promise ring for christmas) and I sat down and wrote out what I want and need for ME out of a relationship, and at the top of the list was NO SEX untill I am sure the relationship is strong, real and I feel the time is right, not because I think I can hold onto a guy that way, and I will never 'go after' a guy again.

Jon is builidng a house this spring, on 40 acres of his dads land. They start the basement in a couple of weeks. His brother is getting married in May, and I would bet Nikki and Jon get married as soon as they can. She is going to work for his dad now at their trucking co., she works everyday after school. His family just loves her. They took her with them when they went to FLorida for a week at New Years, it just all seems to fit. I want that. Not that I am looking for money, i want that security and love and to feel totally accepted. I will find it.

But thank you all for letting me freak out and look like a total shrew ( I am not) and for making me laugh a little at myself. So good luck to all of you and thanks.

[misombra]

glad everything's going okay. you'll find a guy like that, don't worry.