What are the Signs...

[xjadedx]

It's just hard to cut him off I guess. And he doesn't make it easy. Because when I don't reply and don't text him, he seems to get pretty upset....and I end up texting again. He's also always saying, I don't text him enough.....yet he doesn't even respond to the some of the texts I send, till hours later!!!

Friday night when we were chatting online, he'd said he'd call on the Saturday. Anyway, no call came. Sunday afternoon I recieved a text message saying 'Where are you?? No text, no nothing from you?? And you are the one with free minutes!!' I reminded him that he'd said he'd call me and that usually if he wants me to call him, he sends me a text online asking me to call. Then he'd said his friends mum had died over the weekend and he'd been with his friend. Why am I thinking.....bullcrap???

It's a week tomorrow, that he's even talked to me on the phone. A text msg or two a day, is all I've had this week.
This past week, I've felt like he is just checking in on me and that's a bad sign.

It would be far easier for me, if he was the one to just stop communicating....then I wouldn't feel the bad guy.

[Lahrell]

Don't feel like the bad guy. It's exactly the same behaviour as my friend. Is yours having the initials MM as well? .

Anyway, my friend contacted after I told him not to as well, several times. This time I prepared so he can't. Managed to block his e-mails and such, and if he rings I recognise the number, so then I can get it blocked from my phone.

Be the strong one here, if you have a hard time, don't hesitate to PM me .

They're good liars. My friend said he had been at a mates, while he was with his girlfriend . Don't fall for what they say, especially if it doesn't seem to make any sense anymore and it's all too convenient.

[IndiReloaded]

Did you say somewhere you are a single mom? Why are you even wasting your time with this guy? Are you looking to adopt another child? You've already got one to support, why not another?

Cmon, X. Tell this guy you need someone who can pull his own socks up and be a *partner*, not another dependent. Dump him. Tell him if and when he finds a JOB to call you. On HIS dime. If you available, which you probably won't be.

[xjadedx]

Just an update you guys...

I finally found the strength to cut this guy out of my life...

He sent me a text last Sunday night and I responded. He didn't reply. So I'd sent him a text a couple of hours later....still no response. Anyway he never called or texted for FIVE days and in those five days I'd done a lot of thinking and finally came to my senses! If this had a been a guy truly into me and despite the constant contact, the crap he was saying, he would have been back to see me....and more importantly, he couldn't have gone FIVE days, without contacting me!!!

Today he decided to text me. He didn't mention the fact he hadn't been in touch with me, didn't even mention it. ..all he'd said was 'Hi, how are you'?? I simply replied to his text 'Leave Me Alone'!!!!. He'd then text back and said, 'Eff you then, it was always me calling you and running around after you anyway. Plenty more fish in the sea'.
So I told him I'd thought he'd used me, he was a player and to go and play elsewhere.....to which I got a load of abuse, but that went ignored by me.

The guy has well and truly had me conned for the past year....led me into believing I meant something to him and I've hung around like a fool and believed every word he said. I think he has another new love interest in his life of late, hence why he hasn't called in past five days....things maybe aren't going that well that with her...so of course he comes crawling back, as they usually do.

Well I'm NOBODIES second choice!!

Thanks so much for all the replies guys, it was really much appreciated and you all helped me find the strength I needed to end things.

[kate_spencer]

Hello Jaded,
I'm glad that you're finally relieved from a very bad situation you got into with that guy.. he's like a bad air who suffocated you for a year.. and now you can breathe.
You made the best decision here, the problem is, he's still there to catch his next victim. I don't know, maybe I just know a lot of guys like that.
Anyway, I'm just new here.. actually my 2nd post.. hope to meet new friends here.

Thanks!

[Gigabitch]

A break is the last thing I want. I'm unsure I could take a break from him, I'd miss him too much. Communication is important, it's important we keep and maintain that connection. We would drift apart without it.

Yeah. You wouldn't want that. He might change his plan to see you two more times in the next five years.

Look, X, what you have with this guy may be something you're not willing to give up, but I think you should redefine it. He's not your boyfriend, okay? What you've described is basically a pen-pal relationship. Whatever your reasons are for not wanting to face up to that and look for a real ,live boyfriend that could be present in your life and not just on your computer, I think they need to be examined.

So, what's up with that? Why is this enough for you?

[lesa]

Just an update you guys...

I finally found the strength to cut this guy out of my life...

He sent me a text last Sunday night and I responded. He didn't reply. So I'd sent him a text a couple of hours later....still no response. Anyway he never called or texted for FIVE days and in those five days I'd done a lot of thinking and finally came to my senses! If this had a been a guy truly into me and despite the constant contact, the crap he was saying, he would have been back to see me....and more importantly, he couldn't have gone FIVE days, without contacting me!!!

Today he decided to text me. He didn't mention the fact he hadn't been in touch with me, didn't even mention it. ..all he'd said was 'Hi, how are you'?? I simply replied to his text 'Leave Me Alone'!!!!. He'd then text back and said, 'Eff you then, it was always me calling you and running around after you anyway. Plenty more fish in the sea'. So I told him I'd thought he'd used me, he was a player and to go and play elsewhere.....to which I got a load of abuse, but that went ignored by me.

The guy has well and truly had me conned for the past year....led me into believing I meant something to him and I've hung around like a fool and believed every word he said. I think he has another new love interest in his life of late, hence why he hasn't called in past five days....things maybe aren't going that well that with her...so of course he comes crawling back, as they usually do.

Well I'm NOBODIES second choice!!

Thanks so much for all the replies guys, it was really much appreciated and you all helped me find the strength I needed to end things.

He showed true colors huh? Usually after a year or two you get to know the REAL him. I mean his real personality, character, temperament, faults, flaws, and weaknesses. He wasn't good enough for you and I'm glad you don't have to deal with him any longer.

[xjadedx]

Yeah. You wouldn't want that. He might change his plan to see you two more times in the next five years.

Look, X, what you have with this guy may be something you're not willing to give up, but I think you should redefine it. He's not your boyfriend, okay? What you've described is basically a pen-pal relationship. Whatever your reasons are for not wanting to face up to that and look for a real ,live boyfriend that could be present in your life and not just on your computer, I think they need to be examined.

So, what's up with that? Why is this enough for you?

I was happy enough and when we first met, to chat to him. I wasn't looking to date or meet anybody online nor in real life. In real life I am happy to be single and have been for two years and since I split with my ex husband who I was with for 9 years. Then he came along. He'd asked to meet me...and we continued to chat till we did meet.

Reason I hung around and continued to chat till after the meeting, was because he'd said he liked me and he wanted to see me again and he'd continued to call every day. I thought a second meeting would happen sooner than 3 months. First he'd said he'd come back before xmas, then he'd said before New Year...then he'd come the week after and it never happened. But I'd continued to give him the benefit of my doubt for a while longer and because of what he'd say about his financial situation.

I'm unsure what makes you think I was happy to be in this situation? If I was happy being it and it was enough for me, I wouldn't have posted this thread....lol

[xjadedx]

He showed true colors huh? Usually after a year or two you get to know the REAL him. I mean his real personality, character, temperament, faults, flaws, and weaknesses. He wasn't good enough for you and I'm glad you don't have to deal with him any longer.

Probably acted that way because I'd dented his ego, can't take rejection...

Thanks btw