Am I just his f*** buddy?

[Henry123]

I should say to bittersweet00 it can but not necessarily be ".... hurtful and emotionally & psychologically damaging to alot of women".
Best to drop out befor any of this occurs. Go out and find a decent guy who cares for your well being and soul.

[ctr916]

So, what is wrong with being a **** buddy who can eventually feel entitled to a friend with benefits relationship with a guy, if it works out?

[cheeky&sexy]

Well drawing from my experiences.. when i read your post it seems obvious to me that as of right now its just friends with benefits. I've slept with 2 guys immediately, 1 who we started going on dates afterwards who wanted more than sex and 1 who turned into friends with benefits. Your situation definately resembles the friends with benefits as i think unless u are going on actual dates, thats what it is. If he wanted to date u he would let it be known and take u out. His not doing that so clearly he is just enjoying the sex but he probably also likes u as a person or he'd be having sex with someone else. i mean if he didnt like u it wouldve been a one night stand. so there is still hope that u can turn it around. I recommend telling him your sexual history, that the only other guys u have been with were 2 LTR's. That way he will see that this is uncharacteristic of u. Telling a guy u have a low number of sexual partners definately helped my case when i liked and started dating a guy that id slept with the first night. It works because he will gain back some respect that he might have lost for u, he will value u more and see u as potential gf material.. and most importantly it will make him feel special. I wouldnt recommend trying to go on a date with him yet.. because he hasnt expressed that he wants to date u yet and asking him out on a date might scare him away so soon. U need to focus on making him want to date u.. ways of doing this include:

- firstly being honest with him about your experiences like i previously mentioned
- dont act like you're expecting more than you're currently getting (reverse psychology.. lowers any pressure or ideas that you are getting attached to him which will drive him away)
- call the shots- u need to gain control of the situation. play hard to get by turning him down, but then ask him to meet up.. he wont turn u down and it makes it seem like if anyones using someone.. its u using him. ive done this before and i had all the power. He'll be chasing u like a puppy dog for as long as possible if u turn him down 50-75% of the time saying u cant meet up with him cos ur busy or whatever. And if u message him asking to meet up occasionally.. he will most likely do whatever it takes to meet u every time.
- Don't have sex too regularly- if u make him wait, his more than likely going to get frustrated and want to see u more. He'll also be wondering if you're seeing another guy. Therefore, his more likely to start doing things and working harder to see u more so he doesnt lose u.. which is likely to end up in him asking u on a date.
- Don't stay too long the next morning and dont spend the entire night every time- make him wish u would stay longer
- be experimental and confident in the bedroom- u dont want him to get bored and look elsewhere for the next one

Guys get played by girls too.. u have to be the player not the played.

[smackie9]

So, what is wrong with being a **** buddy who can eventually feel entitled to a friend with benefits relationship with a guy, if it works out?

Nothing if both have the same expectations. What usually happens though is one starts to have feelings and is scared to communicate with the other about it for fear of losing them or scaring them away, which is stupid. Step up and get it over with and deal with it then.

[ctr916]

Well drawing from my experiences.. when i read your post it seems obvious to me that as of right now its just friends with benefits. I've slept with 2 guys immediately, 1 who we started going on dates afterwards who wanted more than sex and 1 who turned into friends with benefits. Your situation definately resembles the friends with benefits as i think unless u are going on actual dates, thats what it is. If he wanted to date u he would let it be known and take u out. His not doing that so clearly he is just enjoying the sex but he probably also likes u as a person or he'd be having sex with someone else. i mean if he didnt like u it wouldve been a one night stand. so there is still hope that u can turn it around. I recommend telling him your sexual history, that the only other guys u have been with were 2 LTR's. That way he will see that this is uncharacteristic of u. Telling a guy u have a low number of sexual partners definately helped my case when i liked and started dating a guy that id slept with the first night. It works because he will gain back some respect that he might have lost for u, he will value u more and see u as potential gf material.. and most importantly it will make him feel special. I wouldnt recommend trying to go on a date with him yet.. because he hasnt expressed that he wants to date u yet and asking him out on a date might scare him away so soon. U need to focus on making him want to date u.. ways of doing this include:

- firstly being honest with him about your experiences like i previously mentioned
- dont act like you're expecting more than you're currently getting (reverse psychology.. lowers any pressure or ideas that you are getting attached to him which will drive him away)
- call the shots- u need to gain control of the situation. play hard to get by turning him down, but then ask him to meet up.. he wont turn u down and it makes it seem like if anyones using someone.. its u using him. ive done this before and i had all the power. He'll be chasing u like a puppy dog for as long as possible if u turn him down 50-75% of the time saying u cant meet up with him cos ur busy or whatever. And if u message him asking to meet up occasionally.. he will most likely do whatever it takes to meet u every time.
- Don't have sex too regularly- if u make him wait, his more than likely going to get frustrated and want to see u more. He'll also be wondering if you're seeing another guy. Therefore, his more likely to start doing things and working harder to see u more so he doesnt lose u.. which is likely to end up in him asking u on a date.
- Don't stay too long the next morning and dont spend the entire night every time- make him wish u would stay longer
- be experimental and confident in the bedroom- u dont want him to get bored and look elsewhere for the next one

Guys get played by girls too.. u have to be the player not the played.

Do you believe guys would be more commitment phobic if they were getting used for sex until they clamor for a relationship?

It could be considered a benefit from girl friends with benefits. After all, once a guy gets over the need to be used for sex for a relationship, I am sure he would be much more free to appreciate different aspects of their relationship and quality time together.