What is going on in his head!?!?

[JennaBella]

Hi
thanks for ur post RedMagnum. Hand on my heart I've had no such conversation with my ex lol!! He is the one who compliments me on my appearance and asks me personal questions. Since we split i have played my cards close to my chest and as far as he is aware I'm out dating and having fun. He simply needed me as an emotional crutch. His gf is welcome to him now. She is 8 Years older than me and looks it Good luck to them. If she knew he was in touch with me she would prob be gutted. He is not to be trusted. I won't be telling her! Oh and for clarity he's almost 40 so should be way past the silly little boy behaviour! He's very immature!

[redmagnum]

Yes, just cut off all contact with him.........I have been burned so many times by women, I have learned when to cut my losses and when I'm being "played".

I've been used to make other men jealous a few times, and then thrown away like yesterday's trash......which is fine, I was pretty much aware that I was the "rebound guy" while she "took a break" from her serious boyfriend. Men do the same thing............when they are broken up with a girl, especially when the guy was the one who was dumped........he will often try to rub the old GF's face in his "new squeeze" just to show that he's not hurt.......

[JennaBella]

It is ridiculous the games people play at times. My ex's issue was being on own, he just can't be single. His best mate alluded this fact to me. He is a big child who needs adoration. I'm sure that before long he will realise I am being serious about nc. We have said it before then less than 24hrs later one of us would break it. I was never serious about it before, I still thought we would get together again but now I know that is just impossible. Not because of his gf, they won't last. But because of me wanting better than he has transpired to be!

[lahnnabell]

To the OP - I'll tell ya the truth.......most if not all men have a need to have their ego stroked. Some men are just more mature about it than others.....

This guy wants to be with his girlfreind and get all the "benefits" from that, but also wants the lift to his ego that he's enough of a stud to keep you on the hook, too. The more you respond to him, tell him you miss him, tell him he's hot, etc. the better he feels about himself.

When I was younger and more immature, I needed my ego stroked constantly. I would constantly talk to and text different girls, I would love it when they would tell me I was (funny, hot, they miss my beautiful body, etc.) Even if I was starting to see a girl regularly, I still wanted the "stroke" of other girls telling me I was hot and flirting with me.

Now, I care a lot less about this crap and I actually care about women's feelings.......I am single now, but I do not need constant attention from women to feel good about myself.

I appreciate your honesty in this regard. I've dated several guys that behaved exactly as you used to. It always burnt me up when my ex would do sh*t like that and then try to pass it off as innocent. And I knew what the angle was, but also knew they'd never selflessly admit to being so narcissistic and conceited. I take great pleasure in calling guys out on this now with the intention of never talking to them again. I don't expect them to get it, but as long as they know never to trifle with me again, I'm fine with that arrangement.