When was the last time you been in love?

[nico88]

True, pcmaster. But you know I just don't feel like marriage is something we should step into on a whim or just because it's all of a sudden on her radar. And I didn't say forever. Just not now. I mean..I don't see that as being unreasonable. Is it? I mean shit, if I'm being stupid and selfish than please let me know..

[michelle23]

Marriage never mattered to me either in the past. I dont feel I NEED a ring etc. I know it wont make us any more or less committed or lesson the likelihood of a breakup down the line BUT it offers some benefits to my future children-like its easier to get a mortgage, if one of us dies-the other gets a pension with future child support etc. It offers some security and now that I am getting older and planning to start a family in the distant future, it has become more important. Things change

I do think 2years together though is not enough time for any major steps forward so I see your point

[pcmaster]

Marriage is actually very simple. You like the girl you marry her. This could give you few more years together without kids. All boils down to how much you want her in your life. What bonds are you willing to make. Take a ring and propose her. Or just propose her like that. If thats the case she will come back.

When I was in love I knew I want to marry this girl, whatever to helps to keep her in my life I would do it. I mean theres a point when you just know this is the one.

[so..umhey]

I kno this is not an advice board but I'm gonna give my cents. Marriage is not simple at all. But no relationship is..Whether you're married or not. I don't think you should marry her just because u want her to come back to you. That would be a huge mistake..it's like your heart wouldn't even be in it. If u told her how u felt about marriage in the past just the fact that you're considering it would make me happy but I understand she may not want to wait too long. Then again if u two broke up, she'd have to wait to meet another guy, then wait for him to ask her out, then wait for him to purpose, blah blah blah so there's going to be waiting period.

I have been in her shoes as far as having 'baby/marriage fever' thing goes and felt quit set in my ways until I came to my senses. Which took awhile lol. Maybe she's just throwing a hissy fit???? Good luck!

[HeartIsAching]

PC - by your definition, it's been about 14 years. As it's been pointed out however, your definition is really infatuation.

I have however, been in love (the real kind) for the past 23 years. I'm still in love with her and I'm now married to her for the last three years.

[michelle23]

Pc I wouldnt marry someone just to keep them around. It doesnt protect you from anything. Married people break up, fight, cheat, lie, hurt each other etc just like non married people do. Thats why my only real reasons for marriage is to protect my future children . My aunt died and had a partner and a 2year old. They were evicted from the house coz his name wasnt on it and it was a counsel house (low cost state supported housing). If they were married he would have kept the house and gotten a pension which would have really helped as hes a single dad bringing up a little girl so there my reasons. We were hurt enough losing her and then for him and baby to be kicked out within a month was just horrific. She put her heart into decorating the place for them. She died 3 days before her wedding which was worse..

Anyway I have "baby fever" right now. Id love to get pregnant. Wed be so happy but logically I know its not the right time so I am waiting

[pcmaster]

Well nico says love is there so marriage might be only thing missing here.

[michelle23]

Now would be a disaster for them to get married or have a baby. They are going through a rough patch. They need to get through this first before considering the next step

[nico88]

Michelle: Thank you for saying that because for a second I thought maybe I was just being selfish. I think how long we've been together is huge and I want a shit ton more with her but I don't think it's been long enough for us to get married. Especially since I wasn't thinking of marriage since I've just been kinda put off by it, you know? I was happy where we were and I thought she was too. I felt like things were getting back on track. Its funny how wrong you can be huh?

Pcmaster: There's definitely love there, you're 100% right about that. But I'm gunna have to go with Michelle on this one..with this rough patch we've been going through..marriage and a baby need to put on hold for awhile. Hopefully she'll see that as well and we can work on building us up then we can talk about marriage and whatever else she wants. Like I said I'm down. Just everything else needs to be in place first. We need our ducks to be in a row. Like..we basically need to have out shit together

So..umhey: I don't think she'd take her hissy fits this far but idk. Shes a very complex individual. I love it so much and really really hate it at the same time.

[smiling100]

Thats really boring. Hope you haven't been like this from beginning.

My definition of love is when your mind is gone, when your life depends on one person. When theres some real passion and drama going on. Like in movies. Call it codependent or crazy. But thats what makes life interesting.

“Some lose all mind and become soul,insane.
some lose all soul and become mind, intellectual.
some lose both and become accepted”

No I have not been like that since the beginning at all. I was like you when I was young & dumb & full of ****

My definition of love was exactly like yours but i've learnt that that definition of love is actually co-dependant & crazy. When you give someone the power to control your emotions it's unhealthy.


You've been brain washed by Hollywood. Don't fret you're not the only one




Good luck

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PC with your definition of love PC I would of been in love 4 or 5 times. Now I know it was just lust.


I love my ex wife but I don't love her if you know what that means? The day she dies i'll feel horrible as we will always have something. However today it's pure plutonic & we are friends.

[michelle23]

Lol pc have you not learned anything from this forum? Your definition of love sounds more like twilight. To me my definition is more like "spending more time with him than anyone else and not wanting to murder each other". I spent a week in Newyork with a friend and she irritated me to death. By the 4th day I just wanted to come home. I was having withdrawel symptoms and missed my bf lk crazy. I spend a week with him in spain (24/7) and we had a blast..

Nico: marriage isnt something you should ever be pushed into. You should only do it because it feels right and right now, you know its a bad idea so stick to your guns.

[OrangeSun]

Every day

[hatesthis]

In love with the person I loved.. well I still was as of the beginning of May this year, even though we broke up before I joined the forum after many years together. I made lots of calls, vm's from time of breakup to before Mother's day, off and on, spaces were left in between when we never spoke. I got angry around Mother's day because I am still friends with his sister who lives here, as does his family and she mentioned he won't be coming down for Mother's day is is going on vacation then, but all years with me I was told he always spent time with his family(mom) that day it was a big deal and we could never go anywhere other than or he would only go hang with his mom then and never with my family but 1st mothers day after we break and all of a sudden the ****er can travel elsewhere, I blew up! It's weird what the thing is that kills your love for another *sighs* Feel like closing it off like others said previously, there seems to be no pay off.

[Yanky]

I Am head over in heals with someone who doesnt love me. I've come to the conclusion they will never like me the way I like them and have hardened my heart. Falling in love is not all it is cracked up to be. There is no happy ever after.

Then you weren't in love. Happy ever afters do exist, but not with those who aren't interested. You should find the love of your life, or at least want to. If you keep on pining over someone who told you straight up that he chose someone else, then you probably awon't attract your happy ever after.

[Stay 2gether]

I am glad to say that i have found love again after ending a ten year relationship but when 1 door shuts a brand new one opens!

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I am glad to say that i have found love again after ending a ten year relationship but when 1 door shuts a brand new one opens!

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Glad to say that i am currently in love and loving every minute of it but hey i think i deserve it after getting out of an 10 year relationship that was so crazy he use to steal from me and all but i have overcame that and am now moving forward!

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Glad to say that i am now in a very happy and healthy relationship at this moment after what i went throught the lastten years i think that i deserve it!