Dilemma - I want be more than friends with my 'friend'

[Zekk_T_Strife]

Yeah man, I know exactly how you feel. I used to get real hung up about my best friend and how I wanted more. When I confronted her with it she said it would be too weird. Don't let that scare you, I had been super close with her for four years and that's all she could see me as. But the great thing about that kind of love is that I'm perfectly fine staying friends with this angel I adore. You and I are lucky my friend, you're gonna do fine if you just follow your heart.

[saturday]

I rang her last night to see if she could make Saturday, and she could! So, I've planned some bits and pieces and she's looking forward to going as she's been bored at home over the last few days!
I was on the phone to her for over an hour and a half!!! The best bit was when she said while we were talking she got cold so she got into bed, so I was in bed with her!!! Wooo!! hehehe

"Saturday"

[Illusional]

hrmm.... :? raverboy

[Zekk_T_Strife]

I've done that before. Ah the simplest little pleasures. Gotta love it.

[saturday]

Well everyone - spoken to her a couple more times since then and Saturday has been brought forward to Friday to avoid the school kids as places will be less busy. It's now Thursday night and I'm meeting her tomorrow at 10:30am to spend the day in London! Waaahooooooo!!!! Gonna get to bed now to make the morning come round quicker!!! I'll fill you all in Saturday morning!!

Goodnight all!

[Killerbabe]

Whoo-hoo! Way to go!

[Zekk_T_Strife]

It's friday now and I'm curious to know how things are going with the infamous meeting of saturday on friday. I'm excited to hear how it goes.

[saturday]

Yesterday was fantastic!!! We arranged to meet at 10:30am, and i was so wanting to be ontime and so looking forward to meeting her, I did something soooo stupid at the start, and got on the wrong train, so I was about 15 mins late! Luckily enough, her train ran late so we both arrived together!
We did soooo much yesterday and both had a fantastic time. We talked a lot - nothing about my feelings though, but just talked and talked about college and work and friends and life and everything. I could sit and chat to her for hours and hours.
We did everything from bowling to museums, meal in the evening, cinema, theatre tour, drinks. It truely was a wonderful day - the most I've ever spent alone with a girl and we said goodbye to one another at 11:30pm as I saw her off on her train home.
Once again, we hang out as friends and it was a remarkable day.

The only downside to the day is that it's made me feel much more closer to her, and now I want it to be more than friendship even more. The longer I leave it the worse it gets. Since spending all that time with her I've just discovered more inner beauties that she has, and it's made my love for her grow.

I wanted to bring the conversation around to past boyfriends and romance, but didn't want to bring that topic up as we were having such a lovely time anyway. The closest I got was when she mentioned a past boyfriend she went out with for 7 months when she started college who she split with as they didn't have a social life outside the relationship and he was funny about her socialising with other friends! I do know though that she has been in a relationship since then and still see's him as they are friends - whether it is more or not I do not know.

I don't know how my longer I could carry on as just friends. All the time I'm with her is fine as I'm with her, but when we're apart I can't get her out of my head. As you know, I'm just so afraid that doing the wrong thing my jeopardize our friendship and I'll regret saying anything - but if I don't say anything the chances are I'll regret that if she meets someone who is more forward and open about their feelings.

[Killerbabe]

Naaah. I don't think that someone else will come around and capure your girl. Especially now that you're sucj friends, she might as well consider something else at the back of her mind...you're definitely n the right track!

[Zekk_T_Strife]

Now you and I are in the exact same boat my friend. When, where and exactly how do I tell this girl how I feel. It's not an easy answer and I definately don't know what it is. As far as your situation goes, I would just keep going in the direction you are and when that moment presents itself, grab it. You'll know it when you see it. I've made the mistake of passing over that one moment and i ended up losing her to another guy for over a month. Like this guy wouldn't even let her talk to her friends or anything. Needless to say I was heartbroken. But I was lucky enough to now have a second chance, and I'm not about to blow it. Just look for that certain time when you can reveal a little more to her about how you truly feel. If she embraces how you feel and seems entirely comfortable with whatever you have to say, then go for it. This is merely my advice, I'm sure someone will contradict me. :?

[saturday]

I got a text message earlier saying that she's got a job interview at a national tv channel here in UK for a job which she's looking forward too. Obviously I want her to get the job as she's out of full time work, but I'm at the back of my mind I'm thinking she going to be meeting many more people here and possbly starting a friendship with a potential boyfriend!!
I don't want to think these thoughts as this is partly the reason she split up with one of her ex's cos he wouldn't let her socialize!
Anyway - I just been speaking to her tonight and I said I'll ring her tomorrow to try a bit of role playing to help her with the interview as she feels she's not prepared for the job!! At least I'm speaking to her a few times a week for at least 30 mins a time rather than the odd text message which it was about this time last month! I think I'm heading in the right direction!

[Killerbabe]

I'm so happy for you!!!! oh my gosh!!! LOVE! It's LOVE! Love is in the air! I can feel it! It's ah..so wonderful! And it feels my heart with joy!!! I feel it!

[Zekk_T_Strife]

Wow Killerbabe. That's a lot of emotion over phone calls. But yeah man, it looks like you're moving in the right direction. I'm happy for you, keep it up.

[saturday]

How's this for fate! She had a job interview at the BBC today at 11am in London, and I was visiting a friend in London too. Anyone who knows london knows it's a big place and the underground tube network is massive! Anyway - there's me on the tube in west london and I had to change trains - the doors open - and there's Hayley sitting on a bench at the platform!!!

Her interview was delayed over an hour and there was no-where really to go so she went back to the tube station for a bit! So - I waited with her and chatted to make the time go by quicker before she had her interview. I gave her a hug before she left at 12:15 to go for the interview and I continued my journey! I always did believe in fate!

I always said we were very synchronised - I have a job interview too tomorrow!! Eeeek!!! Very nervous! Just hope she come and finds me at my station! Hehehe

[Illusional]

fate will only take you so far, it's up to you to make the rest happen. raverboy