Third date

[lesa]

I'm jealous! I miss those high days of first starting out

[1averagejoe]

AJ, I'm 37. And do you want cherry or apple?

Yumm... cougar.

I'll take natural...that flavored crap is like putting A1 Steak Sauce on a filet mignon.

[ecojeanne]

God, I'm like a giggling schoolgirl.

hey!! that is very cool, delighted for you sb, fingers crossed for fun times ahead

[Mish]

I'm jealous! I miss those high days of first starting out

Me too......

[1averagejoe]

Me too......

Me three...

[starbuck]

Ok, so here's what he suggested for our Wednesday date:

His apartment, Hellboy 2 on DVD, takeout, and the option of me bringing an overnight bag, so I can stay the night if I want since his apartment is VERY close to my office building.

Now I know he wants to do me, but he's also not the kind of guy who would pressure. In other words, if I told him, "Look I'll stay the night, but let's just sleep. Let's take things slow." I'm 99.9% percent sure that he'd not be a dick about it. So I do feel in control of the situation. Unless the posh English accent is deceiving me, he seems like a total gentleman so far. But also one that's very hot for me.

My girlfriend says I should wait at least three weeks (we've been seeing each other for two and a half). She says unless he's just a "fun boy," to keep up the chase as long as possible so he doesn't get bored. But that sounds like game-playing to me (which I abhor). I'm fine with playing it a little bit cool, but I really WANT to sleep with him and when we start making out, I know it's going to be hard to resist. You guys have told me to wait as well. But now that the chemistry has kicked in, waiting is going to be hard.

I need a good Love Forum talk-down pronto!

[Cain]

Let him penetrate you with his penis.

[Mish]

I sleep on the second or third date

[Charlie Boy II]

there'll be plenty of time for f-cking once things get underway. Another week or two will do him good. Two and a half weeks is just a bit too soon, I reckon.

[starbuck]

Mish, Cain...you're supposed to talk me out of it, buttercups!

[misombra]

don't do it! make him wait!

wait until marriage!!!!!!!!!

[vashti]

Most of the fun is in that anticipation stage, IMO. After you sleep with him, he will (obviously) become increasingly familiar, and familiarity will diminish those feelings. It's doubtful you will ever feel quite so hot for him again, which is not to say you won't desire him at all, but not in the same way. I'd wait a little longer. He isn't going anywhere, and if he really is crazy about you, he is probably enjoying the pursuit.

[Gigabitch]

Stretch this part out for as long as you can- that sweet anticipation will be gone forever as soon as you do the deed.
There will be plenty of time later to do the horizontal bop for days at a stretch, only taking breaks to eat and change the sheets. No need to rush it.

[lesa]

Watch DVD at his apartment, takeouts and sleep over in a sleeping bag after dating for two and half weeks? DAMN!

Unless he is trying to control how you spend your time, all he wants to do is sex you. It doesn’t’ matter if he is a gentlemen or not. Sex is natural. You know this yourself.

Wow that fun died down quickly. He is losing energy too soon and now is trying to see how easy it is to get into those pants. Is he “tired” already? So he couldn't keep up the dates outside of the sleeping quarters huh?

Resistance IS the fun. Are you interested in a long term relationship or a boy toy? Like I said, sex is natural and fun but the real fun for him and you as well is the resistance. No amount of sex can beat the feeling you get because you two are resisting.

If that's all you guys have then what a bore it must be to be with him. You do those things to a boy toy...not a "relationship potential man". He's so excited now and thinking you may be "relationship material". You sex him and he may show a desire for a few more months but quickly and maybe unconsciously put you in the "girl toy" category.

Once you become "sex toy only" you will never get out. Kiss a chance at a long term relationship goodbye.

Right now get to know this guy. He wants you to build emotional intimacy...not physical intimacy. He wants you to get to know him. He may have 40 ex wives and 100 kids in Europe. You don't know him enough to sex him and then expect a relationship. Sex doesn’t mean that you are in a relationship. You sex him now and he will think that is all that you want.

Have you discuss the choice of having an exclusive relationship?

Geez, go masturbate somewhere.

[Mish]

Right now get to know this guy. He wants you to build emotional intimacy...not physical intimacy. He wants you to get to know him. He may have 40 ex wives and 100 kids in Europe. You don't know him enough to sex him and then expect a relationship. Sex doesn’t mean that you are in a relationship. You sex him now and he will think that is all that you want.

This is actually a good point. Get to know him to the point where you can make a decision that relationship is the way to go Star. To me personally sex is to make sure there is a physical compatibility (believe it or not I've been with people with which I was physically incompatible with), but then if that's all good it's straight into relationship. So you may want to post pone that until you're sure this is the relationship material guy.

Don't stretch it out just to play hard to get though, that gets old very quickly.