Is this the best way to handle this situation?

[searock]

I also think he should go for it (i.e. tell her he likes her and that if she ever breaks up he'd love to take her out on a date), but he doesn't want to do that, so the next best thing is to go no contact.

[mollymari]

Well in that case I'm not going to say anything ....


How is this supposed to develop otherwise? I'm not going to stop talking to her, so let's eliminate that option.


I just think this is a difficult situation.


Ok, let's say I keep spending time with her and something does happen. Then her and her boyfriend break up. But what if she's actually better off with him?


The reason I wanted to do it this way was to give her a choice, so she can think over everything and make the best decision for her, while knowing I'm an option, while getting to know me better.

Hey Robert
I agree with Basil&T. Tell her but also retreat a bit afterwards. To continue working on projects or doing what plutonic friends do once you've shared your true feelings with her will not be an ideal situation for either of you and if she is sharing in this notion with you, placing her in that scenario is something that you may understand now but could later haunt you; that she had it in her and her, you.

If you truly like this girl and sense a common za za zoom connection while she has a boyfriend yet still you continue, tell her but as B&T said, retreat afterwards because it is the right thing to do. Some space and the option to be clear before building new foundation

Yes and the fact your asking yourself if she's better off with him means your coming from a good place, that you care.
Most do not support pursuing one of a couple; Yet for many, the za za zoom seldom happens so when it does, to express to that person how great you think they are and if they were single, by goodness you would woo them around the stars and back again. Now that would feel good wouldn't it? She's that great, she ought to hear it.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

She ain't that great. Read how she's acted up to this point.


Robert, you should tell her how you feel, then continue being friends to get closer to her.

[searock]

Robert, you should tell her how you feel, then continue being friends to get closer to her.

You're trolling, right?