"Why 'Nice Guys' are often such LOSERS"

[IndiReloaded]

Why is everyone so hung up on insecurities? LW said it: everyone has them. Anyone who doesn't is either: lying, insane, or retarded.

IMO, we are all about our intellect trying to overcome our hormones. Fear is a normal response to life situations (i.e. insecurity). Question is, what are you doing about it? What's the lesson you need to learn.

Its the ppl who don't think they have anything more to learn that I avoid. Limited.

[miSSleepy]

Why is everyone so hung up on insecurities? LW said it: everyone has them. Anyone who doesn't is either: lying, insane, or retarded.

Because, Indi, some people have more insecurity than others. Some have insecurities that intefere with their life.

IMO, we are all about our intellect trying to overcome our hormones. Fear is a normal response to life situations (i.e. insecurity). Question is, what are you doing about it? What's the lesson you need to learn.

Yes, and some people are doing jack about it because they either think that they can't or they think it's not their fault.

And in large quantities, nothing is normal.

[Michael6084]

Why is everyone so hung up on insecurities? LW said it: everyone has them. Anyone who doesn't is either: lying, insane, or retarded.

I was really trying to point this out in another topic i called "insecurity" and yet i got all types of "it's very bad" type of posts. i dont know why its such a big deal still. i guess people equate "insecurity" with "i LOVE you so much i need you oh my god!" but insecurity could also be as small as "i gotta make sure i look presentable tonight for this date." like you said, if no one ever worries and is insecure-free, they're either: lying, insane, or retarded.

[Sensetive]

Interesting :O

[IndiReloaded]

Because, Indi, some people have more insecurity than others. Some have insecurities that intefere with their life.

And in large quantities, nothing is normal.

So? I don't understand the point of your post.

Isn't the 'hip' word for insecurity these days "shit"? Its a good analogy actually.

I got shit. You got shit. We all got shit. Some have little rabbit-sized poopie pellets & others have big steaming piles of dino-dung (sorry, I'm practicing my alliteration tonight). But its all still shit, and it all needs cleaning up. Now, problem is, some ppl look at their big pile of shit and say "oh shit! I can't clean all that up!" and they leave their pile of steaming shit around, stinking up everything & everyone around them. And pissing *them* off b/c now they have to deal with this *new* shit plus their own.

Now, I have great respect for ppl who clean up after themselves. I have even more respect for ppl who help others to learn to clean up after themselves (provided they aren't doing it to avoid their own shit). So what's the moral of the story? Shit stinks, and its smell doesn't get any better over time. So clean it up, right away, and stop trying to get other ppl to do it for you. Even a big pile of dung cleaned up with a teaspoon will disappear if you keep at it long enough.

[miSSleepy]

So? I don't understand the point of your post.

THIS is the point of my post:

I got shit. You got shit. We all got shit. Some have little rabbit-sized poopie pellets & others have big steaming piles of dino-dung (sorry, I'm practicing my alliteration tonight). But its all still shit, and it all needs cleaning up. Now, problem is, some ppl look at their big pile of shit and say "oh shit! I can't clean all that up!" and they leave their pile of steaming shit around, stinking up everything & everyone around them. And pissing *them* off b/c now they have to deal with this *new* shit plus their own.

Now, I have great respect for ppl who clean up after themselves. I have even more respect for ppl who help others to learn to clean up after themselves (provided they aren't doing it to avoid their own shit). So what's the moral of the story? Shit stinks, and its smell doesn't get any better over time. So clean it up, right away, and stop trying to get other ppl to do it for you. Even a big pile of dung cleaned up with a teaspoon will disappear if you keep at it long enough.

The problem isn't that we have insecurities - the problem is that some people have huge insecurities and fail to do anything about it, ruining their relationships and sometimes their lives. People that fail to clean up their shit are a turn-off, not necessarily people who have shit. That is the point of my post, and the point of this thread.

The whole "what's the problem here we all have insecurities" is just a pile of politically correct crap. We all have health problems too, but it doesn't mean that people with heart desease and high cholesterol shouldn't get treatment.

[IndiReloaded]

Well, good then. I'm glad I could sort that out for you.

[Masterofmind69]

I used to be a real nice guy then i changed for the better I think lol
I used to work with the public, used to tease with the customers. I did it in a humorous way but meaning kinda mean. It was twisted but many female loved it.

I think it's about balance, not being way too nice and not being a total jerk.

[Sensetive]

Girls =)=)=)

[IndiReloaded]

Girls only like you being nice when you're atleast being an arsehole every now and then. what i do is I arrogantly tell my girlfriend what she does wrong instead of telling her nicely, it may seem like they don't like it, but it will bring them closer to you. Girls want to know that they have to try when their with their guy, if you'r always nice...then they won't feel challenged.

You gotta get mad at her when she does something stupid and always be the BOSS! One thing that girls hate is a partnership between her and her boy friend, they want you to run the show! SO BE A MAN!

The only reason no guys are posting after this is they know there's a shortage of good women. They are looking forward to dating your exs.

Carry on, tho. You serve a *very* important function. Every woman should date a guy like you in order to better appreciate the nice guy when he comes along.

[Gribble]

What women want, in my humble opinion, are men who aren't arrogant, crass, insulting, or bossy.

Nor do they want men who are manipulative, deceitful, and cowardly.

They want a man who is reasonable but not devoid of emotion. A man who knows when it's appropriate to put his foot down and say no and who can do so without becoming obnoxious. Most of all, though, they want a man they can actually communicate with and foster a connection that transcends the physical.

In essence, women want a balance. A man who is honest, loving, and generous without sacrificing his masculinity.

At least that's how I look at it.

That essay shouldn't accuse nice guys of being losers. Liars and manipulators are the real losers.

[IndiReloaded]

You are wise beyond your years, Gribble. Good for you.

[Sensetive]

My post was sarcastic btw lol

[IndiReloaded]

My post was sarcastic btw lol

I was wondering... it didn't seem to fit your SN, somehow.

But it was a well-put post. There are a lot of guys out there that actually believe that crap. Machismo types.

[Charlie Boy II]

Women are naturally submissive creatures. Just like they liked to be jack-hammered in bed, females like to be dominated in their relationships. It's just how they're wired. It's just a shame the only thing we're still allowed to hit our women with these days is our meat - and they like that. What about discipline, I ask? Where is the discipline?