OK so besides not drinking and smoking....what do you do for a social activity? Dancing?
I don't do much of any social activities right now, which is was why I started this thread, to see what kinds of places I should start spending time at that may have the greatest probability of meeting decent woman, not the kind that are in bars and such. You guys have given me some good suggestions so far. Keep them coming
Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
--Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh
Thanks for that IndiReloaded. I may give that a shot after trying the other sites a bit longer.
I understand why you think it's better to know a little about the person before going out with them, I personally would feel more comfortable if I knew a thing or two beforehand and it would give me some ideas on what to talk about and since dating sites aren't working for you and you don't go to bars or clubs, where would you find someone you're looking for? Well I don't smoke, drink, go to bars or clubs, not a vegetarian and don't have kids, and you can probably find someone like me at a cafe reading a book, on a train getting to work, having lunch at a restaurant, in the park jogging, at a gym, grocery stores, library, and basically anywhere general all you need to do is look for signs if someone smokes, look at their lips or if they smell like cigarettes. If they have kids, they probably have a photo in their wallet or kid stuff in their bag. If they are a vegetarian you will be able to tell when you see what they are eating.
If you see someone who you think is interesting, start with a smile and talking about a book the person is reading is a great conversation starter.
Good Luck
// Kavi
Join some kind of club or group. Are you religious? Are you into sailing, or bike riding, or board games? It's way easier to strike up a conversation if you already have something in common. But it's very important you don't give off the "marriageable" vibe, because the girl will get freaked out.
Great post Kavie! You make a good point. Most women with those traits probably do read books often. Never even thought of places like libraries, lol. I haven't been in a library for many years. I do read a lot daily though, it is just all digital. I'll have to keep an eye out at those places and signs.
Too bad I don't live in Malaysia as I would probably be asking you out
Thanks
They don't exist
The profiles are prescreened for you. You do not have access to the entire pool. That's part of the point--their system does the gross triage for you.
That said, there are generally a lot of them unless you are an uber strict Christian, homophobe who hates anyone but his genetic twin. And yes, there is a way to view 'outside' of their recommends but if you answer the questions thoughtfully you should have plenty to choose from.
Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
--Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh
And there is a thing at the end of those questions that you can mention specific things about yourself like an interest you have or a deal breaking quality you don't approve of etc that they can read on your profile.
Thanks IndiReloaded & smackie9. I think I will give eHarmony a shot after trying the others a bit longer. I got some help with my profiles on the other sites and think it will help increase success.
Thanks again
Eharmony works better for working professionals I think. The fee is also a turn off for those who can't afford it. That said, it also cuts down on casual riff raff traffic. The cost isn't prohibitive if you think about cost of daily coffee or weekly lunches.
Whatever you do, good luck.
Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
--Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh
There are dateable women everywhere. Including the bar scene. Before meeting my boyfriend (who was my coworker), I met guys when I went out or even just hanging out with friends. If you are just opposed to going to the bar scene, then maybe ask your friends to set you up with someone. I forgot how old you mentioned you were (I'm going to err on the late 20s) but I'm sure they also know of people they could fix you up with.
I did the online dating thing for 3 months and hated it because in my opinion, every guy on there were actually not dateable and they used match as a way to have sex with women.
You're gonna have a lot of dateable and undateable women everywhere. Online and off. The main goal here is to just put yourself out there and filter them out as quickly as you can.
Good luck!