Trusting boyfriend in Thailand. Reassurance/advice desperately appreciated!

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Untrusting, you're not even having sex with him, so why are you so upset that he went elsewhere for it? Why do you care if he has sex with someone in Thailand(he will), if you don't want to have sex anyway? What you have is a friendship. He never cheated on you.

[bulrush]

How old are you?

and 3 months later i still have nights where I cry myself to sleep.

That's not normal. Why aren't you over this? Do you just love to hang on to pain and torture yourself? Is that how you get attention? I think a professional might help you with this issue.

I love my boyfriend, but I still can't trust him.

No, you have an emotional attachment to him because you don't want to be alone. That is not love. It's fear of breaking up. Love means trust. You cannot love someone without trust.

I'm glad you are trying to work things out with him, but you still have some room to grow and be more mature. He apologized about his cheating, and is making up for it. LET IT GO. If you cannot forgive him, he will grow up and get tired of your games, and leave you. If you are that insecure, then look in the mirror, and fix yourself.

He is going to Thailand with a friend I don't particularly trust, who on his last visit had sex with a prostitute, recieved many 'happy endings', smoked marijuana, cigars and cigerettes(all of which I am very opposed too) and drank a disgusting amount of alcohol, and participated in many other unsavoury activities such as the 'ping pong show'.

You are referring to your boyfriend's friend. This is not the same as your boyfriend. Stop blaming your bf for his friend's excesses.

And STOP playing the victim here. You can choose to stay with him and trust him, and stop your whining, or break up with him. But if you choose to stay with him, stop whining about it. If he cheats on you again (I don't see evidence he will) you CHOSE to stay with him, you have no one to blame but yourself. Adults accept responsibility for their choices.

We really are trying to help you with some "tough love", but you have a bit more room to grow, so to speak.

[IndiReloaded]

TRUSTWORTHY equals integrity, which is from the bone, or "what you do when no one is looking" and still come out clean, When your word is your bond and your life is proof of it.

TRUSTING equals a leap of faiith in the discerning person: the confidence in ones own ability to make the right choices and to connect wisdom wiith gut instincts. OR, the instinctual faith of innocence, ( Old dogs and children get it right mostly)

Nice definitions Gypsy. The point I'm trying to get OP to understand is embedded in your defs so I'll make it explicit:

Trusting = comes from you, the individual. A choice, as Gypsy puts it, that ultimately has nothing to do with another person.

Trustworthy = the set of characteristics that makes you decide to Trust.

Figure out which is really your problem and act accordingly.

[Kaius]

He'll be getting tested before we have sex regardless. Condom or not, he's getting tested.
He told me off his own back about cheating on me, so I think his conscience would get to him. I'm friends with quite a few of his friends, so if he did, and it got to any of them, im confident it would get back to me.

HIV takes 3 - 6 months to show up on a test. So he needs to get tested 6 months AFTER his thailand trip to be 100% safe. If you have sex with him within the 6 months window, you are at risk.
Remember, Thailand prostitutes have an HIV infection rate of 50%.... so 1 out of every 2 girls. Plus, many men go there to experience the "she-males" which they don't admit.
She-males are men who are undergoing sex change, so they appear like a woman, but they have penis. Western men are curious enough to receive anal sex from she-males, thinking it's not really
gay since they are practically women already. The problem is, 50% she-males have HIV, and it is extremely risky for straight men to receive anal sex because their anatomy is not used to it.

Why do you feel it is so hard to break up with a cheating boyfriend? It's only 6 months... a very short time. It's a new relationship. If you have these doubts now, you have 0% chance of staying together in the future.
Why waste time?

[Superfantastich]

Just a reminder, it takes 3 months for some STIs to show themselves in a test