what can I do to improve

[anachronistic]

^^ Don't girls ever get tired of seeing the Polo and the Hollister crap? I know I do.

Dress in your own way, as long as it's nice.

[pooker]

I normally keep my hair pretty short that pic just got a little wild so I keep it short.

Alright thanks for the criticism , yeah I am working out and eating alot so that is being worked on. I run alot so its hard to keep fat on me but I agree I definately want some more muscle and am bulking. I want muscle but I am not exactly a tall or thicker framed guy so I fear I will always have that "sissy" appeal even with some nice size hopefully I can put on some nice size though. I am eating alot

I have some nice dress shirts in my closet like not abercrombie and stuff but collored and nice color what about that?

[anachronistic]

I don't think it is necessarily clothing brands that make you look attractive... colors and design is what you really need to worry about.

Actually, clothing doesn't really matter too much anyway. Some people are color blind, and some of us can see lot's of colors that many of us cannot.

Just wear what you think makes you look good; that you feel comfortable in.

[NeoSeminole]

anachronistic says:

"^^ Don't girls ever get tired of seeing the Polo and the Hollister crap? I know I do."

no, girls don't get tired of polos and name brand clothes unless you wear the same thing everyday. I mix it up depending on the situation. I wear a t-shirt and khaki shorts when I just want to chill. However, I dress in a polo or button down shirt with nice jeans when I go out at night or to a party.

"I don't think it is necessarily clothing brands that make you look attractive... colors and design is what you really need to worry about."

I'm not advocating to go out and buy clothes for the sake of the brand name. There is some expensive clothing that I think looks retarded as hell, but the fact remains that some name brand clothes look better than non-name brands. For example, nice Express jeans will beat out any JC Penny jeans.

"Just wear what you think makes you look good; that you feel comfortable in."

this is not good advice at all. I'm trying to help the OP improve his image since it's obviously not working for him, and you're telling him to continue dressing the way he does.

[miSSleepy]

I'm not sure about the whole wearing something to impress over wearing something that you like/look good in/are comfortable in. I don't think it's the OPs image that isn't working... it's his attitude. It's easy to say "well, it's too hard/I'm too lazy/too much effort to change my attitude and improve my self-esteem so I'll take the easy way out and wear different clothes/get a haircut". It doesn't work on women and I don't think it would work on guys.

[ApexSeal]

I think those who're giving you the "just be yourself" line are being a little idealistic. Yes, in a perfect world that's all you need. But this world isn't perfect. We come across hundreds of people a day and we don't have time to get to know each and every one of them. We glance at them and we make a snap judgement. We could be wrong, but we're usually right. One look at you in that shirt you have on there tells me you're a slob, you're a dork, you're a loser. But in reading your post, I realize you're a cool, down-to-earth, intelligent kinda guy. What's even more of a waste is that you look to be in pretty decent shape, and your clothing is too loose and "bum-like" to show it. You don't have very large forearms either so that's no help.

So regarding clothing. You need to either bulk up more, or obtain more fitted clothing (smaller size that'll fit you properly), or both. As for brand name, I'm not saying go out and buy $300 shirts, that's not necessary. But at least consider picking up some more mainstream clothing like American Eagle or Hollister or whatever you happen to like. That stuff is actually not that expensive. What are shirts, like two for $30? Jeans are like $30. If you can't afford this, it's time to get a job (I'll mention this again later). Please stay away from "value" brands. The great thing about a brand like Hollister is that it's friggin everywhere and you look "normal". Something like JC Penny or whatever is going to make you *stand out* from the rest of the crowd, in the worst possible way. Even the most down-to-earth girls are going to have a hard time justifying that to themselves.

Regarding your "social status". Well, chances are if you're this unpopular, this is how it's going to be for the short term. But whatever, you've survived this long, you can hang in there a little longer. Chances are, things will get a little worse before they get better too, as the morons in highschool usually derive a lot of fun out of mocking those who're trying to improve themselves. Just weather the storm. Meanwhile, to improve your ability to deal with people, and coping with public speaking, get a job. If you're not old enough to get a job, volunteer. Get a job or volunteer where you'll be forced to deal with people on a continual basis. Like McDonalds where you'll be handling a new face every 2 minutes. Or volunteer at festivals where you're handing out hotdogs or whatever. This helps you how? It helps you to become jaded to meeting new people, and apathetic as to how they judge you. How do I know this? I know, I've been there. I used to be very softspoken and nervous around people, stumbling over my words. Then I got a job and picked up the ability to sorta smile and talk right through people like I was talking to a fence. Obviously not really like that, but it's a similar thing. Guess what? If you're working, you'll be making money too, and you can pick up some decent clothes. Again, nothing crazy, but just "normal" that'll blend in. That way people can look past your appearance and move on to get to know your personality, without dismissing you with negative snap judgements like I mentioned previously.

Ontop of this, does your school have an Anime club? Seems you would be in your element in a club like that, and it'd give you a good opportunity to make friends and build up your skill in interacting with people. You're not going to succeed on your first attempt. Or even your second. Or third. But eventually you're going to get enough practice that you'll be able to convey your personality without being nervous and "weird".

Finally, getting to the girl part. Look I'm going to be honest with you. Chances are *very* good that this isn't going to work out. You don't have enough experience; it's extremely rare for a guy to succeed the first time he's asked anyone out. But the good news is, it doesn't matter. You're mad crushing on her, sure, but that's going to go away easy. AND, if you're cool enough about how you ask her out, it's not going to make things difficult between you two at all. In fact, you shouldn't even be very direct with asking her out anyway. If and when you get to the stage where you're good enough friends that you can say, walk between classes together and talk naturally, make up some excuse about wanting to see some movie but your friends aren't into it, or are busy, and ask her if she wants to go? That's not necessarily a date or anything, it's just asking a buddy to help you out. If that goes well, then you can go on from there. If she says nah she's busy, or no thanks, then whatever, leave it alone. You can't rush these things. But at least you're still friends, and you're building experience with talking to girls.

Talking to girls in general is seriously something that just takes practice. Yes, there are lots of people out there who grew up in an environment where they never had to go out of their way to work on this. But you and I, for whatever reason, it is/was necessary. So whatever, talk to anyone, everyone you can (in a safe environment like your workplace, volunteering community, church group, club, whatever. NOT random assholes in school who'll screw around with you), and work your way up to talking to girls alone. Get to be close friends with girls WITHOUT the intent of dating them, because that's free experience that just keeps giving. And I don't just mean over AOL or whatever you're on.

Admittedly I was in a pretty similar situation as you back in highschool. It sucked. And it wasn't until my senior year that I came out of my shell and began to live my life, but it was kinda late by then, and some of the supposed best years of my life were wasted. Looking back I can see how easy it could've been, but I just didn't know at the time. Hopefully I can at least get you on the right track.

Lemme know if you have any questions; like I said, I've been there.

[Aegis]

Jesus Christ, do chicks and even some guys actually detect cheap, shitty jeans?! I'm all freaking self-conscious now 'cause I walk around like a wal-mart clearance-sale rat most of the time, lol

[miSSleepy]

Jesus Christ, do chicks and even some guys actually detect cheap, shitty jeans?! I'm all freaking self-conscious now 'cause I walk around like a wal-mart clearance-sale rat most of the time, lol

Look, some girls care about what brands they wear, other girls notice what brands the men wear. Me? I wear what I look good in and notice when a guy looks good in HIS clothes. But brands? I don't notice, and I don't care and it really isn't such a huge issue.

[starbuck]

I don't notice brands of jeans at all. As long as he looks good while I'm ripping them off him!

[Gribble]

Jesus Christ, do chicks and even some guys actually detect cheap, shitty jeans?! I'm all freaking self-conscious now 'cause I walk around like a wal-mart clearance-sale rat most of the time, lol

They only notice if they see the label.

They've all been brainwashed into good little capitalists.

[NeoSeminole]

Gribble says:

"They only notice if they see the label.

They've all been brainwashed into good little capitalists."

no. Like I said earlier, a nice pair of Express jeans look better than any JC Penny jeans. It has nothing to do with the name on the clothes and everything to do with the quality and fit that comes with some name brands.

[Asparagoose]

no, girls don't get tired of polos and name brand clothes unless you wear the same thing everyday. I mix it up depending on the situation. I wear a t-shirt and khaki shorts when I just want to chill. However, I dress in a polo or button down shirt with nice jeans when I go out at night or to a party.

this is not good advice at all. I'm trying to help the OP improve his image since it's obviously not working for him, and you're telling him to continue dressing the way he does.

It depends on the OP's taste and style. I know that personally, I don't feel comfortable in jeans or shorts. I just feel that i'm too old for them. Work downtown for a while, and you're pretty much limited to just dress pants or khakis. To me, casual means not wearing a tie.

But like NeoSeminole said, you don't have to go for the top name brands to look good. Just go with some friends to a mall, and just look around to see what you like. Better yet, try going to a mall with a girl who is just a friend, and ask her what she likes to see on guys and what she thinks would look good on you. Try it out and see if she thinks it works well on you. Be open-minded, try things you don't feel 100% comfortable with, you never know, you might just end up feeling comfortable with your new look.

[shh!]

For the record, I hate polo shirts, and no freakin' way can you get a pair of Hollister jeans for $30 unless you find them in a garage sale. Try more like $75. Some young girls care about brand names, but only if they are stupid, shallow girls. I don't think most females care what brand you wear so long as you aren't wearing something embarrassing.

Also, I am not especially brand-name conscious, but I still like the look of a guy in Levis (traditional fit).

I tried to look at the pictures, but they aren't coming up for me. Oh well. I really think people are much harder on themselves than other people are, and I bet you look like most other people in your age range, anyway.

[pooker]

You gotta remove the (dot) and replace it with . when you put it in the url.

Thanks for the opinions guys , I do have nicer shirts and if you thought what I was wearing was bad that was actually my look nice day lol. But yeah I already got a hair cut and that doesnt make me feel good about possibly being rejected apexseal So is it just my hair and shirt that gives off that impression or is it more?

[anachronistic]

For the record, I hate polo shirts, and no freakin' way can you get a pair of Hollister jeans for $30 unless you find them in a garage sale. Try more like $75. Some young girls care about brand names, but only if they are stupid, shallow girls. I don't think most females care what brand you wear so long as you aren't wearing something embarrassing.

Also, I am not especially brand-name conscious, but I still like the look of a guy in Levis (traditional fit).

I tried to look at the pictures, but they aren't coming up for me. Oh well. I really think people are much harder on themselves than other people are, and I bet you look like most other people in your age range, anyway.

I ****ing love you.

All my pants are either Levi's or Arizona, because they are cheap, and they look decent. Don't usually wear jeans, but mostly corduroys and dark dress pants. Besides, it's not the pants you wear; it's what's underneath!