Girlfriend Cheating

[littleninja007]

lol we shall see

[Aeradalia]

OK so my gf and I have been together for 5 months now, and everything was fine, until i went into her facebook, which she does allow me to do, she says she doesn't have anything to hide. She doesn't have internet at home so she gave me her user name and password so i could change major things or update things as need be, she uses fb on her mobile so can still send messages and basics.

She gave you permission to view her profile... you are romantically involved with her, so it is expected that your curiosity will get the better of you and you will read over some of her messages. It's natural and should be expected especially in a situation like this.

However i went into her profile and looked at her messages, not reading them just looked, but I saw one that made me a bit uneasy, so i went into it and she was talking to some guy the night before, he was asking what she was wearing and and she was flirting back, saying how shes would do him in his car and on his bonnet, and how they should sneak off, he then asked for a picture which she said brb which I assume she went to send him one, because he said to her "now you making me hot".

A woman's attraction to another will be based more so in emotion than physical... so if she is indulging in an emotional affair, then the physical aspect is soon to follow. I would be deeply concerned and not take this lightly.

The thing is how do i confront her about it?
I was also in the wrong for reading her message, but I never expected that. She did say she doesn't have anything to hide. If she gives me free reign on her profile it's expected?

I'm quite confused and not sure what to do, should i just leave it?

Thanks in advance

This is a matter of two evils... Yes you read her messages, but it's not like you broke into her account. Instead you had access to the information via her permission. Either she forgot that you did have such access or she intentionally wanted this to happen for reasons unknown (though possibly to leave with you feeling guilty or she's one of those who aren't happy unless their world is falling apart).

When weighed out... you reading the messages on an account you had permission to access and her possibly cheating on you (emotionally cheating is verified)... then I would think she doesn't have a leg to stand on. What you did isn't even in the same category of severity when compared to what she's doing.

Cheaters like to take a flaw you may have and focus on it in an attempt to deflect your attention from their infidelity --- from their wronging of you. You don't have to stand for it... and you shouldn't. Print up the message and confront her on it. If she asks why you accessed her messages... say it's because she gave you access to her account and said she had nothing to hide.

[1averagejoe]

The weird thing about this situation is that my ex gave me her facebook/myspace login, and the same situation happened to me.

It sounds like your girlfriend likes drama.

Sounds like my ex...give her the high school drama queen award.

Why would you wait even three minutes to confront her? Print the message out and place it firmly in front of her, silently, giving her a very stern look.

I would print it out, drive over to her house, ring the doorbell, give her the paper, turn around and leave. /relationship

My God man! Have a look at yourself! The bitch is cheating on you!

Clearly...even if it isn't physical right now, it's only a matter of time. Like mentioned before, with women it's emotional first then it becomes physical. Even if it's not physical, this is an emotional affair. This isn't harmless flirting.

Read this:
[url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emotional_affair[/url]

They say never open your partner's inbox, you'll find something which you won't want to read

Been there, don't that. I completely agree.

^^^ That's so true, but sometimes it's something you should know.

Yep yep...sometimes it hurts.

[littleninja007]

Thank you all, thanks Muffin Princess, 1averagejoe and Aeradalia, that really cleared it up.
I will think about it and see lol
It's not like shes bored with me, she says she loves me and always wants to see me and that.
Maybe shes just looking for a bit of fun, or maybe she looking around for future potential, i don't know, but I will confront her soon enough, as she still broke my trust, even if it is just for fun.

Thanks all again

[1averagejoe]

she still broke my trust, even if it is just for fun.

See...the thing is, that's going to destroy your relationship. I guarantee it. You're going to constantly be wondering where she is, who she's talking with, and what she's doing. This will drive her crazy because you're going to come off as jealous. Which you sort of have a reason to be. Without trust the relationship won't work. I've been there, and I'm sure others will agree as well.

Staying with her will only hurt more, even if it was honestly harmless fun. You're going to be constantly questioning and doubting her whereabouts. So my recommendation to you, is to end it quick. Like pulling a band-aid off fast. Spare yourself the hurt. I know it sounds like an aggressive approach to this, but it will spare you one hell of a heartache.

[littleninja007]

Staying with her will only hurt more, even if it was honestly harmless fun. You're going to be constantly questioning and doubting her whereabouts. So my recommendation to you, is to end it quick. Like pulling a band-aid off fast. Spare yourself the hurt. I know it sounds like an aggressive approach to this, but it will spare you one hell of a heartache.

I guess you are right yeah, it does seem to be the better thing to do.
Right before my birthday too lol

Thanks

[sthforreal]

I am so sorry about what your girlfriend did. But confronting with her is the only way to get everything clear. It's only been five months and she already did that? I just dun think this relationship will work if this is how she is. Dun wait till ur in too deep. I've had a similar (actually way worse than urs) experience myself. Honesty and faithfulness are what keeping a relationship going. If she already broke one of those, there's really nothing left to hold on to her or this relationship.

I hope you'll be fine soon. =)

[MisterFlapJack]

I think the whole point of having access to her account is for her to want you to know that there isn't anything she should be hiding.

You should really confront her about it.

[littleninja007]

I still haven't confronted her about it lol don't know what to expect.
Shes been asking me why I'm acting different though, I've been dropping hints about it and that

[1averagejoe]

I'll say it again, don't waste your time with her. Confront her about it and end it. It's going to turn sour regarding this sooner or later, might as well do it before you're in too deep.

[Ms.Cruise]

That happened to me one time. When I checked my bf chat logs and finding out that he's flirting with some girls that he told me that they not friends to begin with. So I confronted him about this flirting on these girls and he told me that I don't know the whole story. So in the other words I'm in the wrong side. And he wanted me to say sorry for my actions. I think that probably happened to you too. I'm not saying not to discuss this things to her but I prefer to know the truth than to keep in myself and keep on wondering.


Ms. Cruise

[sarah_rsl]

OK so my gf and I have been together for 5 months now, and everything was fine, until i went into her facebook, which she does allow me to do, she says she doesn't have anything to hide. She doesn't have internet at home so she gave me her user name and password so i could change major things or update things as need be, she uses fb on her mobile so can still send messages and basics.

However i went into her profile and looked at her messages, not reading them just looked, but I saw one that made me a bit uneasy, so i went into it and she was talking to some guy the night before, he was asking what she was wearing and and she was flirting back, saying how shes would do him in his car and on his bonnet, and how they should sneak off, he then asked for a picture which she said brb which I assume she went to send him one, because he said to her "now you making me hot".

The thing is how do i confront her about it?
I was also in the wrong for reading her message, but I never expected that. She did say she doesn't have anything to hide. If she gives me free reign on her profile it's expected?

I'm quite confused and not sure what to do, should i just leave it?

Thanks in advance

Is it cheating really? and is it worth ending your relationship over?

Either way what she did was inappropriate and you should confront her about it. To be honest if it was just a purely online thing then by definition its not that serious. A lot of people including myself don't really attach that much significance to online relationships.

It was probably just a thrill to relieve boredom, do you still flirt with girls watch porn etc etc its at the same equivalent level.

One thing I would say is this if you do confront her with it and you both resolve your feelings, then forget about it. Don't throw it in her face in some future arguement because that will end your relationship only it'll be a slow death instead of a quick one.