Does he like me, or just a player?

[Dreamon]

Thanks for your message... I wish I could confirm that I stayed away, but I did not. I'm going to copy my other post in here because for some reason it's not appearing on the main forum even though I posted it twice:


Ok back story - I crushed mega hard for a co worker (I work in a bar), he has a crazy reputation but I thought that we just clicked - we can't stop laughing when we're together etc, but I thought he didnt notice me in that way so I was on loveforum christmas time asking advice. A few days later I woke up to a text from him - he must have asked for my number off someone.

From then we were just texting non stop, chatting away, he'd send me about 4 messages at a time every time.. Anyway our conversations just confirmed my thoughts about us getting on but I was sort of keeping my distance for a while - I'm mega busy with uni work and still wary of his reputation. Anyway I had a free night last Friday and I'd just handed in an awful essay and really wanted to just let loose and I thought he was the most fun person I know so we made plans to do something.

During the week running up our text message conversation turned a little dirty - definitely my fault as he was wanting something to watch and i was like watch some porn that's always fun, joking thinking he'd just lol or something - but he ran with it and the conversation went on for ages and seriously he said some crazy obscene stuff - I honestly hardly said anything.
OK another incriminating thing I did was ask to stay at his house Friday - partly because I genuinely needed somewhere to stay partly because I felt like I just wanted to have sex with him (I've liked him since September and it seems like we have a connection of some sort, plus never been with such an experienced/confident guy).

Ok so Friday we decide to just hang at his have a smoke and a drink to save money spending in bars. I went round, it was fun we didn't kiss for absolutely ages and when we did he told me how he'd been wanting to do that for so long.. so the night progressed and we were kissing but I got so nervous (it was really apparent how experienced he was in comparison to me) - so I said I know our texts were pretty full on but now that you're here in front of me I'm so nervous I don't think I can have sex with you, so we just went to sleep. On the Saturday we went for a meal, had a really lovely time - we were working together that night and he said he really wanted me to stay again, I was like "you sure after last nights failure?" he was like yeah, so we had a fun night at work and then I went back to his.

OK so this is it.. We went back to his hung out started kissing and then I got nervous again and I said
"Listen, I had a really bad sexual experience a few years ago that makes me sort of freeze up with new people, I know we had that text thing and then I genuinely thought I was over my issues but now I can see that I'm not over it and I don't think we'll be able to have sex, you make me feel really nervous" He assumed I'd been raped - (not exactly but along those lines). Any way then I turned to go to sleep, and he puts his laptop right next to me in bed, sits up and starts watching porn, touching himself and sort of laughing in a weird way. I felt so uncomfortable I kept asking if he'd rather I'd leave the room he was like noo, but in the end I was like "listen I'm leaving" and he turned it off. I fell asleep and was woken up to him asking "can I watch you touching yourself" and I was like "are you serious" then after a bit of tossing and turning he said "I'm sorry can we just forget this happened?" and I said no.

The next day it was so awkward, he was apologising but I just wanted to leave. I ended up walking around in the snow miserable as hell! I did buy some new clothes to cheer me up though. I had work that night without him and it was a really good night. He didn't text me until Monday morning just sort of chit chatting, I'd realised that I'd left some stuff at him I needed before getting my train out of town, so I popped to his Monday morning and he apologised again, seemed really down, as i was leaving he was being attacked by his kitten and he said something like "now I know how you feel being attacked in bed" so I just left and text him saying I didn't want to see him again, how I'd taken a risk with him and he'd confirmed too soon that it was a mistake.

He text me saying that no one has made him nervous like I do, that he was so ashamed and really wanted to show me how he actually felt. I don't know... He keeps texting me and I can feel myself thawing, but I've just been ignoring his last few texts - I don't know whether to just block his number. I asked a male friend about what happened and he said it was the most disrespectful thing he could have done given what I'd told him.

A part of me really likes him still, I don't think I've gotten on with anyone so well, however I keep remembering how he made me feel in bed, that plus the fact I'm doing a masters and it's really crucial I do well and I'm planning on leaving town in September anyway so maybe it'd be better to just block him, get over the awkwardness at work and forget.

What are your thoughts on what happened? and should I block his number?

sorry for the mammoth text!

[lovehurts88]

Okay, so this guy has never asked for your number or any source of contact outside of work, never made a move when he had plenty of chances, you're getting warnings from other people, never said bye with back turned, let alone hasn't asked you on a date?
Hate to say it girl, but sounds like you're being played. I would be careful. Sounds like a trying and testing deal(what one of the PPs said). If you want to know what this guy is really like, get to know him more, ask the girls that have dealt with him, about what he's like. If you get very similar stories(especially from this Egyptian co worker) this guy has to be bad news. Doesn't sound like he's investing anything in you accept alcohol and smoking and trying to be nice. But of course he would be, especially if he's a player. I wouldn't just talk to only him about it because more than likely he's not telling you info he doesn't think you want to hear. And if he seemed hurt over what other people said about him, than seems like he has a guilty cons