Possessiveness/Peaceful Surrender

[Lite]

you can not be a possession as an individual. it will hurt you in the end. you are not his, people do not belong to others. you can not be happy without freedom.

Hrm, let's see. The inside of my wedding band reads: Mine! As does hers. We consider each other as belonging to the other person. Everybody enjoys being objectified at times, and if it is done in a caring and respectful manner, then it's great. It isn't that she cannot go do something when she wants, merely that she has enough respect to ask me if I would be OK with it first.

I own her, she owns me. We are the rulers of each other's kingdoms. Just like a Benevolent king/queen owns his serfs.

[Mish]

My husband gets quite protective when other guys are around. Its rather subtle, but he stays a lot closer to me and touches me more in their presence.

And it works too

It worked like a charm in the clubs. I remember as a rule of thumb, (friendly) touching a girl in the club will immediately scatter about 80% of guys trying their moves on her. I think it might be a subconscious cementation of competition, the idea that as well as trying to build attraction that they will also have to fight off a competitor is too intimidating for many. It's a kind of a psychological preemptiveness.


As far as "I'm yours / you're mine" thing, I thing it's pretty standard relationship dialogue up there with playing house and "I miss yous / I love yous", nothing to worry about as long as there are no signs of controlling behaviour.

[Lite]

As one of my favourite authors wrote:

In the war of the sexes, the only way to win is mutual surrender.

Or to quote Voltaire, "It is not enough to conquer, one must learn to seduce."

[Aeradalia]

Everybody enjoys being objectified at times, and if it is done in a caring and respectful manner, then it's great.

I agree... I feel a sense of reassurance when he says I'm his... and I like the thought of him being mine...

He's my guy, my bf, my love, my better half, and my schatzi... he's mine.

I'm his lady, his gf, his darling, his better half, and his precious... I'm his.

[IndiReloaded]

Or to quote Voltaire, "It is not enough to conquer, one must learn to seduce."

Ha, nothing as fancy as Voltaire.

Lois McMaster Bujold.

[Cbrider]

Possessiveness is part of a healthy relationship as long as you are both comfortable with it.

He has the right to step between you and a guy trying to get your attention or attraction. He can't stop it though, you have to meet him halfway and stand your ground against others.

Theres a really fine line between being protective and being controlling and if you walk it just right you make your girlfriend feel happy, protected and loved.

Guys can read others guys better than they lead you to believe. We know when we are crossing into another guys comfort zone and we let it be known without saying a word. Inevitably there will be guys who cross the line and disregard your expectations or wishes and thats the time when your girlfriend should step up and tell him off.

[Lite]

Ha, nothing as fancy as Voltaire.

Lois McMaster Bujold.

Come again?