Female friends developing feelings for my boyfriend?

[Ariadne]

Well there was a friendship base there before this occurred, so is it really fair for her to demand of him to complete cut ties?.. he probably shouldn't be msg'ing as much as it sounds like, but it doesn't equate him keeping backups or being emotionally cheating or what not. You can't just force him to drop friends because of your own insecurities.

Sure I can o___o

If you're dating someone exclusively there are certain boundaries. I mean if they HADN'T said they liked him, I would agree wholeheartedly that she should back off and let him have his friends. But once they crossed that line, they're no longer JUST friends, no matter what he may claim. He'll always see them as potential girlfriends/hook-ups because he knows they want to go there with him. Even if nothing came of it, he's--you said it perfectly--emotionally cheating.

EDIT: Also, the fact that he likes to look through her phone, but not let her look through his, makes me think that he knows he's doing something wrong by talking to girls who like him as more than a friend. Guilty conscience.

[Poetic_Partner]

"...Also, the fact that he likes to look through her phone, but not let her look through his..."

Ariadni,
I think you misread the OP. Her bf DID let her look through his phone. The fact that they BOTH have insisted on doing so shows me that there's precious little trust in the relationship.

-PP

[Ariadne]

The way the OP worded it, it seemed like she was saying that he OFTEN goes through her phone, but doesn't like her to look through his, which led her to wonder why. If that's the case, I can understand why she'd want to check it out. She was a little vague about it, though.

I don't really see a problem with going through your partner's phone as long as they're aware of it and don't mind. Sometimes I like to look through bf/gf's pictures and ask about any that seem like they have an interesting story behind them. And--this is going to sound a bit strange--I like to look over text conversations between us from their phone. I feel like it gives me a new perspective on what we were talking about or something lol

[VincenzoG91]

I suppose a foursome is out of the question.

[Neyy]

Going back to the original question, and my view on it, maybe he is keeping the girls around as just friends because simply put, they are his friends. He did not tell them in any way shape or form that he was interested and he said to the OP he wanted to figure out what to do. Maybe he doesn't want to tell them no, not because he wants them as backups, but because he doesn't want to ruin the friendship they had, or make it awkward. My guess would be he is waiting for their feelings to simply blow over and for them to move on so he can continue being friends with them, and he doesn't want to just 'shut them down' so to speak even in a nice way.

I know I dislike doing it and I'm sure there is at least one person who agrees.

Now not to go against the OP, but being a guy and having been in a similar situation with a girlfriend of two years, don't be jealous. Stop being paranoid. And don't worry. The game is no longer get rid of the backups before you have to use them. He see's it like this (If you choose to 'attack' him about it), my girlfriend is driving me insane with this constant choosing of who my friends are. And eventually if it gets bad enough his friends become his priorities.

What you should do, is talk it out with him. Calmly. Explain to him your not comfortable with him but DO NOT RESTRICT HIM. Just get the point across that you trust him your just a little shaky.

Anyway thats my view on it.
Good luck.