her fren got told me tat she kinda like me oso...but i still not dare to take a step to improve our relation ship....
her fren got told me tat she kinda like me oso...but i still not dare to take a step to improve our relation ship....
come on guys.. even in india and some asian countries (obviously, malaysia) arranged marriage still happens. it's their old tradition and though it's slowly diminishing, it still exists.and he did say he's 17 which means they're still minors. some countries allow marriage but no sexual contact until they're both in legal ages (and yes, government give out those orders). they're allowed to live together so they could get to know each other and adjust to the situation.
gosh.. nornor it's a hard and awkward situation...
you just can't expect things to go smoothly. after all, you were both forced into a marriage you both were not agreeable to just because you had to grant an old man's last wish and what's more, you're both too young. i respect you for your bravery and i understand your predicament.
just do things you used to normally do and treat her with respect, care and understanding. talk to her and know what you both like or not like. support her for whatever she is going through. don't think about sex yet. you have to develop intimacy before you get there. and you cant develop intimacy if you dont know each other well to care about each other's needs or wants.
anyway, it's still too early so you right now, you're still adjusting to the situation. why dont you start out like courting her? you know, like how boyfriends and girlfriends start out. get to know each other.. go out and do fun things together.
hope you understood me... best of luck.
The minimum age for marriage in Malaysia (if you are male) is 18, I believe.
Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?
i believe they also have the special marriage license.. people who are under 18 but above 16 years old with parental consent.
I think you're right ... I know the Philippines still asks for parental consent even if the girl is in her 20s or at least parental awareness until each is 25. (Trust me, I would know) ...
So, I'm guessing that he wants to know how he can charm her to make the relationship feel more legit and not simply "arranged" ... Am I on the right track?
[EDIT]
OOoook, so it is a situation about courting and getting her to like you. Make her laugh (if she's not attracted to you) ... Show a good side, be respectful, but don't be a pushover.
Damn, I wish we could translate this into Malaysian ... I knew that's what he was when he said "la" ...
Oh and nornor, I'm not a female (sorry) ... but if it makes you feel better, I am married.
Last edited by tooxshort; 29-05-08 at 01:47 PM.
no autographs, please!
The more I see, the more I don't know for sure. - John Lennon
Life is ... Too Short.
"It seems we living the 'American Dream', but the people highest up got the lowest self-esteem. The prettiest people do the ugliest things ... for the road to riches and diamond rings."
yeah.. but speaking of special marriage license for parties who are below 18 years old but above 16, it also exists even here in the Philippines. and yes, i checked out malaysian marriage law and they really have it.
yes you are...care to give him any of your brilliant ideas? hehehehe
It's tough because I'm going to be saying all this crap that he might not get and plus ... It's tough to say with the differences in cultures, you know?
... I just stuck with what was universal ... who doesn't like laughter?
no autographs, please!
The more I see, the more I don't know for sure. - John Lennon
Life is ... Too Short.
"It seems we living the 'American Dream', but the people highest up got the lowest self-esteem. The prettiest people do the ugliest things ... for the road to riches and diamond rings."
yeah.. but he's just asking some advices / tips on the normal matters.. no need to delve into the cultural differences.. just on how to make their relationship, if not so well, at least a little better. the guy is obviously lost. exactly why he's been into a lot of different forums.
thx jinx43 and every1 for trusting me....malaysia under 18 can marry but nd both parent permision...but government warn us not to sexoni after 18....erm can i know wat step shld i take to start like wat action or wat shld i do? like u say.. a bf and a gf work out? anyway thx ya for trusting me
nornor, you're welcome.. it's not that the other posters dont trust you. i just understood for a fact that what happened to you is real. that things like that still happens in this era.
anyways, tooshort said that you should make her laugh or happy.
find out what she likes or what makes her happy and do them. ask her parents (if you're close to them) or her friends what she likes. just start out with making her comfortable with your company. make her feel happy, special and loved. as what tooshort said, who doesnt want to be happy?
anyway, you're married already so you have all the time in the world to make her trust and care about you.
do special things for her.
my father buying me a honda civic so tat i hope can fetch her go school everyday will tis work oso? i hope tis work leh...
just i take a afternoon nap...she got hold my hand and sleep...i can feel tat she like me oso but i not dare to say it..
fetching her from school means more time with her... so of course it will help. you could talk to her about funny things you did or share funny stories while you're driving home
or you could drive her somewhere nice...
but i still havent get my lesen..i failed 3 times on the parking test....deng....grrr feel upset abt it..but she gt cheer me up haha
jinx343 can i hav ur email? ican ask u straight away..i giv u mine [email]raw_yong@hotmail.com...hope[/email] u dun mind to add me...