My guy looked through my cell phone..help..emergency!!!!!

[Agape]

no thats the thing he wont talk to me..he just turned his phone on broke up with me via text and shut it back off..and both of us are 22..i feel like my world is falling apart right now

is this a common thing? . . . seems kinda of an over-reaction if it was just a few texts? this was a one year relationship . . . is there things you aren't telling us?

Perhaps type up some of those texts.

[snabo]

is this a common thing? . . . seems kinda of an over-reaction if it was just a few texts? this was a one year relationship . . . is there things you aren't telling us?

Perhaps type up some of those texts.

** ok this is what happened...the guy who emailed me is from the us (a different country from what i live in) and fighting overseas right now..he sent me a pic of how much weight he has lost since hes been there and said.."look at how much weight ive lost!" i replied "wow you look great" he than said " whatcha up to?" i replied im drinkin a bar..he replied oh getting drunk again..ridiculous lol" then i said" im omw home now love ya" and he then later asked if i got home ok..

it is now day two and my bf wont talk to me..he sent a break up via text message and said how can i do this to him. Like idk what to do..ive said sry and attempted to explained I didnt remember even doing it even tho its not an excuse..that i love him and want to be with him and he is purposely torturing me..he wont let me explain he just shuts off his cell..he said "well if you love him be with him then etc" fml im so lost..i honestly havent eaten in two days..every time i try..i just end up being sick..im so rattled by this..i can't believe he wont even listen to me..he has gotten mad about me being that guys friend before this situation just on "feelings" he has had....what do i do?

[snabo]

Let him calm down, then go somewhere neutral and talk it over. Of course he's going to be mad and blow you off for a couple of days. What may seem like just flirting to you (in the moment or after the fact) may seem more like you have feelings for someone else to him. Just reach out to him, and the first thing you should say is "I'm sorry, I love you".

** ok this is what happened...the guy who emailed me is from the us (a different country from what i live in) and fighting overseas right now..he sent me a pic of how much weight he has lost since hes been there and said.."look at how much weight ive lost!" i replied "wow you look great" he than said " whatcha up to?" i replied im drinkin a bar..he replied oh getting drunk again..ridiculous lol" then i said" im omw home now love ya" and he then later asked if i got home ok..

it is now day two and my bf wont talk to me..he sent a break up via text message and said how can i do this to him. Like idk what to do..ive said sry and attempted to explained I didnt remember even doing it even tho its not an excuse..that i love him and want to be with him and he is purposely torturing me..he wont let me explain he just shuts off his cell..he said "well if you love him be with him then etc" fml im so lost..i honestly havent eaten in two days..every time i try..i just end up being sick..im so rattled by this..i can't believe he wont even listen to me..he has gotten mad about me being that guys friend before this situation just on "feelings" he has had....what do i do?

[snabo]

** ok this is what happened...the guy who emailed me is from the us (a different country from what i live in) and fighting overseas right now..he sent me a pic of how much weight he has lost since hes been there and said.."look at how much weight ive lost!" i replied "wow you look great" he than said " whatcha up to?" i replied im drinkin a bar..he replied oh getting drunk again..ridiculous lol" then i said" im omw home now love ya" and he then later asked if i got home ok..

it is now day two and my bf wont talk to me..he sent a break up via text message and said how can i do this to him. Like idk what to do..ive said sry and attempted to explained I didnt remember even doing it even tho its not an excuse..that i love him and want to be with him and he is purposely torturing me..he wont let me explain he just shuts off his cell..he said "well if you love him be with him then etc" fml im so lost..i honestly havent eaten in two days..every time i try..i just end up being sick..im so rattled by this..i can't believe he wont even listen to me..he has gotten mad about me being that guys friend before this situation just on "feelings" he has had....what do i do?

[Petit Papillon]

I merged your 3 (sic!) threads into one. DONT POST THE SAME STUFF 5000 TIMES, ONE IS ENOUGH!

[Bella82]

** ..ive said sry and attempted to explained I didnt remember even doing it even tho its not an excuse..that i love him and want to be with him and he is purposely torturing me..

You're right -- it's not an excuse. What I'm wondering is, why did you tell this Ex that you loved him? I know we all make mistakes and say things we don't mean, but maybe you should think about if there is any truth to that. And if there's not, why did you say it.. do you like the attention, or.. ? Also the last thing you want to do is to say you don't remember... that demeans any and all credibility you have.

Unfortunately, I don't think there is anything else you can say or do right now. No matter what you say, the fact of the matter is that you were texting back and forth with your Ex.. and it ended with you saying "Love ya". The problem for him is probably more than just those texts. Looking at it from the outside, if I were your bf, I would wonder how much you really talk to him and I would have a hard time trusting you.

I know it's tough but you need to let him be for a while and leave him to think... if the roles were reversed, how would you feel?

[Agape]

he sent me a pic of how much weight he has lost since hes been there and said.."look at how much weight ive lost!" i replied "wow you look great" he than said " whatcha up to?" i replied im drinkin a bar..he replied oh getting drunk again..ridiculous lol" then i said" im omw home now love ya" and he then later asked if i got home ok..

Is that all? . . . I guess that "love" part got to your boyfriend

[MerryH]

Yeah, it really sounds pretty innocent except for that "love ya" part. It shouldn't have been said, but if I don't think it would bother me enough to break up with someone for it.

And I don't get why everyone's overlooking his behavior or condoning it. It was shitty that he looked through her personal belongings and throwing a phone at a sleeping person is even worse. Be glad that he broke up with you, forget about him, and stop drinking so much.

[BeingAlpha]

Okay,

I can't give you advice on what to do beyond what everyone else on here is saying.. but I'll give you some insight into what he is probably thinking...and warning 80% of his feelings right now are probably not rational...but hey Love is not rational

1) why does she have her ex bf's number in her cell phone

2) How often does she text / talk to him

3) Doe she still love him?

4) What other exes does she talk to?

5) Does she see him in person (granted he is overseas so this is less of a concern)

6) Has she physically cheated on me with him or anyone else?

7) How could I have been so stupid as to trust her -- ie: he was mad at the guy friend thing..he is probably taking this as validation that something fishy went down there.

8) DO I have to worry everytime she goes out drinking..what if she ran into the ex in person?

Now comes the fun part -- imagine he does accept that this was a one-off thing and it never happened before, never happened again, and wouldn't happen with anyone else...

Everytime yo get a text message --he is going to wonder/want to know who it is. Everytime you get a phone call he is going to want to know who you are talking to. If you do something like walk out of the room to take the call -- he is going to think you are talking to a guy (the ex bf) whomever.

You will get annoyed with his constant distrust, and then you will blow up at him for not trusting you -- he will think you have some audacity since you are the one that "betrayed" him.

Lack of trust and betrayal of trust are two things that can really kill a relationship -- I am not judging you but ask yourself if you have both of these....you definitely have a lack of trust now..and your bf believes you betrayed his trust.

I am sorry this happened but thats why I maintain that exes are exes -- and thats it...there is ALWAYS unfinished business with exes either on your end or theirs...maybe this is not the ideal or perfect answer for everyone and maybe people will hate me for saying it -- but theres a good saying: "Let sleeping dogs lie."

[doppelgaenger]

Meh, I probably wouldn't have been bothered by it, except the "love you" part.

[misombra]

He was probably looking for an excuse to hit the road.

[Kyouhen]

well you ****ed up by getting shit faced, but everyone does when they have fun, it's that age, people here need to stop being so ****ing self righteous.

What you really need to do, is demonstrate that despite your falling off track that if your serious about him you want another chance and show him your serious.

It's not always the guy's responsiblity to make things right.

Go do something for him which is crazy but how he will know it was a mistake and you actually love him

[Applesauce]

Kyouhen says:

"well you ****ed up by getting shit faced, but everyone does when they have fun, it's that age, people here need to stop being so ****ing self righteous."

try again. If a person still has to live out some teenage notion of getting wasted in order to "live life to the fullest," then they are not ready for a relationship and shouldn't waste their partner's time

[Petit Papillon]

^^ That's SO Neo-style lol , even the same colour And he dare to say that he's not Neo lol

[Applesauce]

Petit Papillon says:

"^^ That's SO Neo-style lol , even the same colour And he dare to say that he's not Neo lol"

oh dear lol, you got me all wrong but then again... you've never been the sharpest tool in the Nerf factory. I have requested that I be called by my username. It's no different than correcting someone after they call you by a nickname rather than your preferred name