Going great, then she says she needs time to get over her ex and cant see me anymore

[JELEF]

I don't know . . . you might just be opening up some more complex, troublesome situations . . . I'd say it would be unnecessary to do anything, hey, you might even be pressuring her some now?

If she needs space, give her space? . . . don't play some cat-and-mouse game, if she wants you then she can come back to you.

Yeah, I agree with this. If it's a day or two after, then maybe a tidy message to say that's life and you've not got any hard feelings for her. It happens to everyone.

Any point more than a few days would probably be too annoying to be worthwhile. Would show that you're still thinking about this when perhaps she's no longer doing.

As she was the one who cut you off, I think it's up to her to decide when and if she wants to speak to you again. And if/when she does, it's up to you to decide whether you want to accept it or not. She had her reasons for ending it, so unless those have gone away, they'd still be preventing her from wanting anything to do with you. Let her resolve that. In the mean time, forget her and enjoy your life and your friends.

[lakerman34]

This one really touches home. I'm dealing with a near exact situation. Girl REALLY liked me, we got VERY intimate twice, her friends told me how she always talked about me, I'd help her with her math (college students), I'd tuck her in at night, and she slept in my bed twice.

Then, it all stopped.

I went to the school counselor (was VERY skeptical, friend recommended it, turned out to be best thing I could have done).

He told me to just quit the calculations, you like her, it's as simple as that. You don't know why, you don't know what that means, but you like her. She asked for room, so give it to her. A couple of days may or may not do, it may take months. She may even see other guys, but you have to realize, that's out of your reach.

You CAN go to her (face to face) and tell her you like her, you are going to give her her space, and this doesn't mean that she doesn't have to like you, and doesn't mean your friends. This may be the best or worst thing you can do.

It may be unbearable to see her with another guy, but she seems like she'll have the decency for it not to be a friend of yours, and you won't really know about it.

I don't know how old you are, but the counselor told me something that really hit me. I know I made the mistake of having sex with another girl in order to get my mind of the girl I like. It was OK, but wasn't anything special. We young guys tend to be afraid of "love" and don't want to be monogamous because we're "young." Any sexual encounter we have is not going to be as exhilarating as it would be if we were making love to a girl we like.

Then I knew, I was going to wait for my girl. No other girl was going to come in the way. Meanwhile, have fun with your friends. You are using your human mind right now with this girl; thinking too analytically about your situation. It's almost as if someone is punching you, and you're taking the punches while you need to take the momentum from the punches and throw them to the side. Use your dog brain more; the one that has fun and a great time. Look at the wisdom of your situation. Learn from it. Life is just a bunch of mistakes. It's what makes life interesting and fulfilled.

Give the girl her space. One of two things will happen: If it was meant to be, it'll happen. Even if it's 2 or 3 months down the road. Or, you grow distant, and then you have to choose if you're satisfied being friends with this girl, or if you don't want to be friends. At this time, for the most part, you'll be "over" her.

Just live and have fun, my friend.

[m1085r]

*****UPDATE*****

So, after the cols message on wed, 3 days later she texts me saying "Hey, hope your well, just wishing you good luck for the game 2moro x". I leave it a few hours, respond saying i'm doing well, just relaxing in pub etc . Say i'll let her know how we get on and lave the message closed.

The next day after the game, were both online on facebook and after 5 mins or so she asks me "How did u get on?" I respond, make a joke, she replies, i say something, she does. I then, say how i've gotta go cos my teas cooking etc and wish her a good day at work (she works nights) and then end with "spk sn x". To which she doesnt reply and I return online an hour later and were both online for 2 or so hours and she says nothing. I only expected a "thanks, have a good evening, bye x" sort of thing.

So what do you think this means. I mean twice now she initiated conversation (text then facebook), but particuarly when on facebook she was off and didnt respond at all to when i put bye..... ???

Very confusing! What do you think she wants? and what should i do? Was thinking of leaving it 3 or 4 days and asking her how her new jobs going?

Help again please lol x