The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness, can be trained to do most things
now if you are facing that many obstacles, especially such as religion, from the get go then you have to realize that you ARE wasting her time. you are not losing anything, but she in fact IS.
The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness, can be trained to do most things
Ive first seen her irl a year ago. I asked her to meet up like 2 years ago, but she never wanted to. Then all of a sudden it couldn't go fast enough. Although recently she told me she only 'wanted to hear' i would move here. Something she often does. She asks something of me, and all she wants to hear is that i want to do it, not me actually doing it. Ofc i always interpret it as a real question.
Anyway, I just want to find an answer. I'm not sure if i want this forever. Sure, there are things i dont like about my situation, but other things I do like. I just want to know if my doubts arise cos of missing my home country, cos of other reasons? Will this become 'better' in the future? Should i be patient? (which I have been till now). I feel like i dont want to just quickly give up and regret it later. It's just difficult ... I love her. But can I give up my country and all connected to it? Sure, by moving here I gave up a bit too, but that didnt feel as definite as this would.
This being my first relationship doesnt help much, some experience might have been helpful i guess : / I dont know if I could give her up ... but i dont know if i want to give up all for her either
Your first relationship? How old are you? If you are under 28, I would break off with her and move on, because younger than that is too young to get married.
And stop living with women before you are serious enough to consider marriage. Women usually only do this as a step towards a marital relationship.
Last edited by vashti; 04-03-09 at 03:01 AM.
Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?
I'm 26. And I don't live with her, she still lives with her parents. But she stays at my place several times a week.
Just dunno what to pick in such a situation. When one is incertain, should one pick to break it off, not awaiting further potential changes. Or should one stay, try to make the best of it, and see what happens?
I'm not really the impulsive kind, not easily giving something up. Let alone a relationship :s
100% agree, since when did relationship mean no arguments, ur thinking about leaving her everytime u argue? u dont love her.... u just havent met any1 better for u yet.
u already said u can get engaged w/o it getting married for years... where's the problem with that? u can still leave an engagement or even a marriage, but dont bother trying u really need to take this break to really workout ur true feelings as u seem to see relationships completely wrong... maybe u havent had/seen many real relationships.
I also have face this problem once, we couple for about six years until now.. the solution here is understanding. She is very special to me.. although she keep asking for engagement, but she let me finish all my problem 1st. She is very patient person. Try to talk with your gf nicely. Discuss about your situation..
i'm a spamming mutha fuka!
I'm not thinking about leaving her everytime we argue. I'm well aware argueing and fighting is a part of every (healthy) relationship. However there's argueing and there's argueing...
Often she gets mad or nervous for the slightest thing that goes wrong, not being able to cope with anything remotely negative... Or when we are fighting she sometimes even hits me, or tries to hurt me with some scissors or something. Somehow I don't think that's supposed to ...
It created this feeling with me that I'm constantly thinking about what I say, and many things I don't even talk about, cos I know it will 'upset' her :s I always imagined my partner as being someone I can tell anything to, without that person getting upset/nervous about it. Or it to be someone I can ask for a favor, for some help, without that person getting upset/nervous. I don't feel these things.
And to who said I'm too young to get married? That's how I feel too. She doesn't however. Think it's the habit in this country to get married asap. Which I don't find good. It's not something one rushes into. Only creating quick divorces imo, or unhappy couples.
Anyway, things are 'ok' again atm. She stopped talking about the engagement ... but for how long will it last? That's what I think everytime. I wish it would stop pressuring on us, then maybe we can develop a more healthy relationship. : /