I feel hopeless. I need advice

[Boisdevie]

But as far as the rebound thing goes he was divorced 10 years before he met me. And hadn't had any relationships right before me.

He was single for a decade? That to me suggests he's got problems when it comes to relationships.

[searock]

He was single for a decade? That to me suggests he's got problems when it comes to relationships.

Yep. Which is confirmed by the facts that he's a 35 year old dating a 23 year old and that he's a 35 year old with commitment issues.

[smackie9]

Yup he needs to grow the f uck up.


Call him out on it. Ask him why is he still with you if this is torturing him so much? Is it to punish you? Does he get satisfaction seeing his words devastate you like that? F uckin jackass.

Stop treating him like a king, make him earn it. Take back your self worth. Start making yourself scarce, so he will figure out he doesn't have that control over you.


IMO you are wasting your time with this guy. You will never get that solid loving relationship back.

[moonstruck]

He was single for a decade? That to me suggests he's got problems when it comes to relationships.

I mean he wasn't single for the whole 10 years. He just didn't have a serious relationship RIGHT before he met me. He had one like maybe 2 years before we met. I was just trying to express that I couldn't have been a rebound.

I haven't had a lot of relationships either. Even though NYC is over poplutated lol its still hard to meet people

[searock]

moonstruck, you're only 23. Even if you had been single for the past 10 years, it wouldn't be half as weird as a 35 year old man being single for the past 10 years. The fact that he wasn't actually single for 10 years doesn't mean that he doesn't have issues.

[moonstruck]

Yup he needs to grow the f uck up.


Call him out on it. Ask him why is he still with you if this is torturing him so much? Is it to punish you? Does he get satisfaction seeing his words devastate you like that? F uckin jackass.

Stop treating him like a king, make him earn it. Take back your self worth. Start making yourself scarce, so he will figure out he doesn't have that control over you.


IMO you are wasting your time with this guy. You will never get that solid loving relationship back.

I have definitely made myself scarce. I don't call or text unless he initiates contact. Which he has been doing a lot. I don't know why I expected him to draw away from me but I did. He calls, text, asks me why I'm not talking to him as much and he's still coming over tomorrow. He's treating me like he always has(He's calling a little more) and I long to slip back into that comfort zone, let him love me, and hope he gets over it. But I'm still a little scared of getting hurt. I guess the only thing I can do is try. Letting him go right now seems impossible and if I get hurt in the end it will just be another life lesson for me to learn. I'm hoping with all my might that he will see past that incident

- - - Updated - - -

moonstruck, you're only 23. Even if you had been single for the past 10 years, it wouldn't be half as weird as a 35 year old man being single for the past 10 years. The fact that he wasn't actually single for 10 years doesn't mean that he doesn't have issues.

I understand. And deep down I know he has issues I guess i just didn't want to admit it. I haven't felt this alone in forever. I realize I depended on him for so much, but I thought that was how it was supposed to be. You meet a wonderful person fall in love with them and you entrust them with your heart and happiness and they entrust theirs to you. It felt so good and freeing. Like nothing I've ever felt. Makes loosing that seem intolerable. Like Something so good can't possibly come to an end so fast and without reason. I feel like all of the bliss we had will be forever imprinted into my memory. It almost doesn't seem fair(I know life isn't fair). But knowing that doesn't make it any easier to accept

[smackie9]

And now he wonders why you are not answering his texts as much.....like really? Is he that f uckin thick in the head? He thinks things will carry on as normal after he said those horrible things to you? He's an insensitive bastard. He's had a failed marriage and 10 years of failed relationships, and now this.....kinda makes you wonder eh?