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Thread: I just need help

  1. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by daffetz View Post
    my girlfriend left me for reasons that I'm too in secured that I question her every move and I don't trust her. I'm heartbroken but somehow I feel that I'm not totally wrong here. she has this male friend and she said there's nothing between them but when she visits this guy she stayed for long in his house just the two of them sometimes she go to the market buy things and cook for him. wash the dishes and I told her I don't like it that she should stop it, but she just insist that I trust her. that they are just friends. when I found out she's still doing it I told her friend. and she said because I told her friend and because I don't trust her then it is over. I just don't know what to do. she said I should not contact her again.
    It was not okay for you and you told her. She didnt change, maybe kept lying to you and its good that you broken up since it was not on your terms. I think she was fcking him. Otherwise she wouldnt break up with you so easy. Your relationship wasnt so strong and she didnt like you so much thats why she left.

    She is right - better dont contact her. In time you will see that breaking up was for good. This was not high quality girl.
    Last edited by pcmaster; 04-08-18 at 04:07 PM.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  2. #17
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    thanks PCmaster.

    I also have a problem. I sometimes abuse her immotionally with my frequent call and texting plus questioning her move sometimes. I'd like to stop I'd like to do better. I just want advice on how to be a better person. thanks. I'm OK with her going as I now know its for both me and her good. but I wanna do right next time.

  3. #18
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    Man you have to work on your confidence and realizing your self worth. Also be busy and have a life purpoise and goals that takes most of your day. Have friends and good relations with relatives and other pople so you wont feel lonely and with that you wont be needy to text and call often too. Basicaly you have a lot of growing to do and being self suffficient and happy without girlfriend before you can do well with a new girl.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  4. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blasekiller View Post
    I got a girlfriend for almost 6 months now and i know i can trust her and i do, but before we made it official a different guy also tried to get her as a girlfriend. She rejected him but i constantly live in fear that he tries to make another go for her, i know this is probably just stupid but i live in a sort of anxiety because of this fear. I love her very much and everything goes well but in the back of my mind it keeps bothering me.
    So let us assume that you have THE hottest girlfriend on earth.
    You think she will not getting hit on?
    Girls get hit on all the times. Especially the pretty ones

    So let us assume that she likes the new guy. And she leaves you for him,
    What can you do about that? How can you prevent it?

    - - - Updated - - -

    And if you still not get it

    Imagine you are the girls
    And you are hot. And you know it. And you have a man whom you love.

    What could your ma. Do to stop you going with someone else? How could he prevent you from falling for someone else?

  5. #20
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    What i am doing right now is keep doing my best for her, i always try to improve, do fun things together, i try to show her that i love her and i am willing to work at our relationship and put energy in it and try to come up with new things to do but also do throw backs on what we used to do

  6. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by daffetz View Post
    I also have a problem. I sometimes abuse her immotionally with my frequent call and texting plus questioning her move sometimes. I'd like to stop I'd like to do better. I just want advice on how to be a better person. thanks. I'm OK with her going as I now know its for both me and her good. but I wanna do right next time.
    This is what I meant in my earlier post about managing your emotions (and anxiety) through control. Your behaviour as stated above is controlling and it's also oppressive. If you don't learn to manage your feelings better, it's going to result in the opposite of what you are trying to avoid by controlling her.

    She will start feeling oppressed, suffocated, stifled, become turned off and leave you. Learn ways to manage anxiety, exercise (my new boyfriend does boxing at his gym to alleviate his anxiety) any type of exercise will help.
    Last edited by MsLondonB; 06-08-18 at 03:07 AM.

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