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Thread: Weird Breakup, Completely Heartbroken and Lost, Need Advice Please

  1. #16
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    Whatever it is, she (he) means it. For myself, I think she's married. I am sorry for you but I think the best thing for you to do is put her out of your mind and move on, it seems irreparable. Dooy.
    Good luck,
    Adam

  2. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Queens View Post
    I'm a terrible person and believe me you're better off with out me.
    I don't know about the rest, since its speculation. But when someone tells you something like this^, you've best believe it. Either its true, in which case run, or they believe its true. In which case... run.

    IMO, people who are self-depreciating this way have some sort of baggage they need to deal with. Unless you enjoy feeding strays, you should look for someone more balanced.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

  3. #18
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    I wasnt aware that this post was still getting replies. Anyway, i have a major update, which is what alot of you suspected.

    So we broke up about 3 weeks ago, and these 3 weeks have been awful for me. Every morning i wake up with a feeling of emptiness inside of me, a void, like i was robbed of something. Ive been drinking heavily pretty much every night, and i started smoking again. Whats bothered me is every morning waking up and flat out lying to myself, telling myself ive moved on when i havent, its an awful feeling.

    So 2 days ago, i go to sleep, and i have a dream about her. In the dream, we reconciled our differences and everything was perfect, and then i woke up and i saw my pillow and i was ready to cry from the smack of reality. Ive felt for the past couple of weeks that my mind is torturing me in a way, it wont let me move on. So I wake up that day, and i have this on my mind throughout the day. At night, I say to myself, what do i have to lose? I hadnt contacted her in weeks, so i thought whats wrong with one more attempt. I send her a really long text pouring my heart out to her, telling her that i still love her, and that i just want her back......... and again no reply.

    So the next day, im going about my daily routine, and i see a text pop up on my phone, and its her. The beginging of the convo went something like this
    - Im so sorry for what i did to you, you never deserved this
    I just want to move on, if give anything to be with you
    -I cant be with you, I lied to you
    what did you lie about?
    -Rich, Im married


    And my heart sunk. So I tell her that i still love her, and she tells me she still loves me. I brought up that i felt a special connection with her, and she said she feels it too. We get to talking about her marriage, and its clear that shes not happy. Shes says its on the brink of falling apart, and she feels no way out of it. She almost seemed afraid talking about her marriage ending, and deep down i feel like this guy abuses her. I was ready to tell her to fly over here right now and start a new life with me.

    So this morning, i still live with my parents, and my mom could tell that something was wrong, im cool with my parents right. So I tell her the situation, and she tells me pretty much tells me if i tell her to fly over here, i cant live here anymore, they wont pay for my college, theyd pretty much disown me.

    So what do i do? Do i take the biggest gamble in my life for what my heart tells me is right, or do i live always wondering what could have been and have to face myself every morning?
    Last edited by Queens; 13-07-10 at 10:19 PM.

  4. #19
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    She needs to deal with her marital issues on her own. Work it out with him, divorce, whatever.. she is not in any position to be in a relationship with anyone else. DO NOT THROW AWAY YOUR COLLEGE EDUCATION FOR THIS!! it is not worth it!

    If she gets a divorce and moves on without you being there then is still available for a relationship, then you can try to date her. I would not advise gambling with this- especially since she lied to you in the first place anyway.

  5. #20
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    Your mom is absolutely right.

    If this girl had been telling you all along "you'll find a great girl for you", that is a BIIIIIIIIG indicator right there she doesn't have much an intention of ever really being with you. Once she realised she was either stringing you along or became aware that you actually felt for her in a way she didn't or couldn't about you, she broke it off.

    Sometimes people in crappy relationships find other people to patch up some void in their lives,
    and I'm sorry, that was you.

    Best thing you can do is cut off contact. If she's old enough to be married, she's old enough to figure out how to deal with this on her own, as it's her problem. You're young and you've got someone paying for your education- don't **** that up.
    Give me something I can take,
    Can take to make the memories fade.
    Poison kiss, remember this,
    I never was meant for this day.

  6. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by lilly1185 View Post
    Your mom is absolutely right.

    If this girl had been telling you all along "you'll find a great girl for you", that is a BIIIIIIIIG indicator right there she doesn't have much an intention of ever really being with you. Once she realised she was either stringing you along or became aware that you actually felt for her in a way she didn't or couldn't about you, she broke it off.

    Sometimes people in crappy relationships find other people to patch up some void in their lives,
    and I'm sorry, that was you.

    Best thing you can do is cut off contact. If she's old enough to be married, she's old enough to figure out how to deal with this on her own, as it's her problem. You're young and you've got someone paying for your education- don't **** that up.
    If you dont follow this advice, you WILL eventually regret it!!

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