Partner Changing Appearances...

**VincenzoG91** · 07-12-12, 10:53 PM

Originally Posted by Ohne Dich

Hey, when did this become about him?

Post a picture of yourself, along with a picture from at least a year ago, and the discussion will move back towards you.

My girlfriend is mixed race. Except for her flat nose and kinky hair, she looks like a white woman with an amazing bronze suntan and a light sprinkle of freckles on her face. She uses a hair iron to straighten her hair and currently has some blonde and blue streaks mixed in her hair. Although the streaks look cook, I know that she is damaging her hair, so I wish she wouldn't do that. Otherwise, I adore her appearance. If she started bleaching her skin, I would still love her, but I would find her less attractive.

**VincenzoG91** · 07-12-12, 10:59 PM

An old friend of mine got a nose job, and it permanently changed the sound of his voice, and not for the better.

**bcgirl** · 08-12-12, 08:55 AM

I've dealt with ppl wanting to change their appearance on a regular basis. I've worked in the plastic surgery field. Society and media tell u big breasts are "better" than small one because men like them. Small, petite noses are more "adorable" than wide, broad noses. You wouldn't believe how many times I've heard "I want Nicole kidmans nose". But reality is that ppl need to learn to be grateful in the background they have. I can understand if someone has a major disfigurement and wants to change, but Heidi montag, Nicole Kidman and the famous MJ all looked so much better pre surgery

**doriangray** · 09-12-12, 04:29 PM

Guy here. Personally, if I'm with a girl in the first place, I already like how she looks. If she wanted to change her appearance dramatically, I would be supportive, but I would also wonder about the underlying reasons. I'd definitely want my partner to be honest with me about something like this so I could understand why she's doing it. I'd recommend being open and frank about it, and going from there.

**bcgirl** · 10-12-12, 01:23 AM

^ what if the partner wanted to change their appearance so dramatically like in the form of a sex change????

**dem862** · 10-12-12, 01:57 AM

Why are you asking a bunch of strangers? This is a question for your boyfriend. Everyone is different. He may love it, or he may hate it, but nobody here knows. If you are changing your appearance in an attempt to cure basic insecurity, it will not work. That only comes from loving and accepting who you really are inside. You can put lipstick on a pig, but it is still a pig. Not that pigs are bad in any way, mind you.

**HeartIsAching** · 10-12-12, 02:52 AM

I'm going to turn this around - how would you feel if your boyfriend started dying his skin to make it darker, got a really tight curl permed into his hair and was going to get surgery on his nose? What about if he did it without discussing it with you?

You need to be comfortable with you.

**OKANEED** · 10-12-12, 05:58 AM

Originally Posted by HeartIsAching

I'm going to turn this around - how would you feel if your boyfriend started dying his skin to make it darker, got a really tight curl permed into his hair and was going to get surgery on his nose? What about if he did it without discussing it with you?

You need to be comfortable with you.

This ^ Why discuss it on a forum if you won't discuss with your BF?

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