Just friends zone-close but not too close

[Asip4u]

I think i know where you''re headed with this whole thing. You have to understand that not everyone is going to be that honest and tell you exactly something along the lines..."Oh, i dont find you attractive enough to go out with you"...Therefore, yes, at CERTAIN times, they will tell you that they see you as just a friend to not hurt your feelings. Second, there are OTHER times when there is that bond between a male and female however it feels more of a brother/sister relationship so it would be very awkward to start something, not to mention you're at a risk of losing a great friend.

Either way, if you're getting into those problems, it's mostly because you're not establishing yourself as someone who wants a g/f earlier on. This way, you know what you want, you either get it or you don't, and that way you won't have to worry about being stuck in the "friend zone".

[Rosebud]

You know Asip, you have said everything I have been TRYING to say on this thread, it just keeps coming out all confusing!!! LOL

[Asip4u]

You know Asip, you have said everything I have been TRYING to say on this thread, it just keeps coming out all confusing!!! LOL

Just keep smiling, Rb ...

Yea, i know. I have repeated a few things you already said and hopefully added a little too. He should be able to get something from this now. If not...I give up..lol

[Rosebud]

I hear ya on that!!!! I feel like I've repeated myself over and over!!! LOL

[Tone]

I agree with posts #1 and #2.

I know what you mean, guy.

And Hayward goin for the event or the person is also a really good point.

[all_the_colors]

I only made this topic to get a better understanding of the whole friends zone situation, not because it happens to me often. I tend not to ask out my friends out of fear of ruining the friendship over anything else, but thats a different story. I just wanted a better understanding of the whole situation and I guess I got what I wanted after all. I honestly didn't think a friend zone existed out of personal experience but you guys have proven me wrong apparently. It was just hard for me to see that there actually is a way you can get "too close". I always thought the closer you got to someone the better off you were.

Again, sorry for all the...I guess confusion in explaining what I really wanted to know, I really did try to look at it from everyone else's point of view. Some of it was just hard to picture or understand, I don't know maybe it was the way I was reading it. I do appreciate everyone's help though, especially those who came back and constantly posted to help me see things their way. Thanks everyone!

If I may ask now, for the majority of the time do people who say "I only see you as a friend" actually mean it or are they just trying to spare the other person's feelings? I understand that it can go both ways but I was just wondering perhaps from your personal experiences which way it was used more.

[Rosebud]

Again, that would depend on the people your talking about. Obviously your friends don't mean it that way. I have said that in the past as well to let people down easy so i guess it all depends on the person and the situation at hand.

[whaywardj]

*sigh*

"...I tend not to ask out my friends out of fear of ruining the friendship over anything else..."

Therewith, you've answered your own question.

[soul_on_fire]

Another reason why they could say they just want to be friends is because they are scared of the feelings involved. Scared they will get hurt, and lose a friend. Just one of my experiences.