Top 5 Tips!

[miSSleepy]

see, i was thinking about it after i made that post.. it does reflect my lifestyle. as long as i have sex and i have my liquor without people bitching to me, i don't even need food to survive.

squirt, it's not really a pain to put the toilet seat up, do you ever men complain, "oh shit, i'm going to die because i have to put the damn seat up"??

raverboy

no, but you complain about women complaining about it
It's so ridiculous, the whole thing! I live with two men (my bf and my father) and with the double male laundry, double male kitchen-mess and double male socks lying around the house, the toilet seat is the last thing on my mind! Seriously, my whole life I just go in and put it down without even THINKING about the issue ..... gahhh

[GrkScorp]

1) Compliment him: guys need a bit of reassurance too..don't just reap in the compliments and smile...tell him how handsome, funny or sweet he is..etc..

2) It's the little things that count: often guys need to feel that they are needed and appreciated by their girlfriend. Whether it's just a simple "you mean so much to me" or even calling them up unexpectedly to tell them you love them. I learned the hard way when my 'boyfriend' said that he just wanted me to call him up sometimes without having a reason to.

3) Indulge him: massages, little gifts, cooking him a special meal, taking him somewhere romantic, helping him out when he's busy etx. It doesn't have to be Valentine's day or his birthday even..just surprise him.

4) Cook for him (taken from point 3): i think this one's worth repeating cos i've never met a guy who doesn't enjoy good food. I've cooked for my boyfriend: from chocolate cake, muffins, and cookies..to pastas, casseroles and roasts. There's a billion other recipes you could try..and you don't have to be a pro.

5) Intimacy: yeah couldn't have a top 5 list without mentioning it. it doesn't have to be sex (im sure he'd like it though)..it could be anything from learning a new way to kiss..treating him with a soothing massage, having a bubble bath together, or if anyone's every tried it..showering together even. it would be good for you too..but make sure you make time where it's just all for him.

Well.. lol.. I would say your list is very good.. for a woman.. but there are some subtle modifications I would make as a guy..

First; combine category 1 & 2 to come up for one category called (reassurance).. which is simply there to make guys feel good from time to time.. we're not chicks.. we don't need this EVERY day.. but yes.. once in a blue moon goes a long way..

Then, modify category 3. Guys are not really into that stuff.. seriously.. if you really want to treat him.. (stop b*tching).. that should be the name of category #3.. there's nothing a guy enjoys more than the first initial part of the relationship where the woman is trying to get ground and won't start nagging/b*tching until months later.. it's like heaven.. it's so peaceful, so romantic (for guys) when females are feminine and not manly (which is what screaming/yelling is.. ever since the barbarians, noarse, vikings, etc.)

I'm not a big fan of category 4, but only because I actually enjoy cooking, and haven't met anyone who can cook better than me just yet.. it's ok if I don't.. because I also like cooking and feeding other people.. BUT.. nearly all other men don't share this feeling, and I guess they'll starve or die slowly (feeding on crap).. so fine.. you may keep your category 4..

Since there's no longer a category 2.. let's make a new one called.. (non-verbal reassurance)... yes.. guys could care less how often you "tell" them things to make them feel good.. guys want to feel good for themselves and arrive at that conclusion un-assisted.. so.. what can you do??? DRESS & LOOK the part.. nothing makes a man feel like a MAN, a WINNER, an Alpha-Male.. like being next to (in the presence of) a hot, sexy, smoking, woman.. There's a bonus to category 2.. (it's a self-feeding cycle).. you make him feel good about himself.. you feel good about yourself.. he then has the strong urge to treat, take care of you, buy you stuff, be more romantic.. etc.. and then that makes you feel better and want to do the same back.. and the cycle is self-feeding.. Looking great & dressing great on every single day (and super-great on some special days once or twice a week).. do MUCH more than any compliment you can throw at him.. even the old "oh my god.. you're so big.. stop.. it's hurting, not so fast.. ahh".. [if we wanted to nominate best supporting actress for an oscar, we'd watch the E! channel]

Finally.. what really bothered me is category #5... for g-d's sake!!! you're talking about a man.. not a woman.. guys don't get turned on or get ANY pleasure whatsoever from everything mentioned in your category 5.. WOMEN do.. MEN don't!!! So.. yes.. guys have to understand that woman don't think the same way they do about sex.. but women also have to understand that men don't think the same way they do about sex.. So take that stuff out.. and put some other things in.. like (don't be so lazy in bed, get off the bed!!!, try some other places, have sex in a pool, in a tub, rent a boat/yacht and have sex in the cabin while out in sea, engage in more non-intercourse activities, try to keep teasing to 2-3mins.. anything less is fine if you're both already in the mood, anything more is just overkill and will make sex suck for him.. 2-3mins is perfect.. trust me on this one.. when teasing, try to get your "spots" involved with his best friend.. "chest, legs, butt".. you'd be suprised as the amount of women who neglect to have a guy's "you-know-what" rub against those areas during teasing.. (doesn't make sense? it's the male brain when it comes to sex.. i think that's all u have to know)... then.. as he's about to orgasm.. "provoke him".. give him the green light.. sound the golden trumpets.. guys are children at heart.. when he's about to blow his load.. there's nothing more enjoyable than a woman who KNOWS what's going on and let's the guy know.. she'll let the guy know that she's GOING TO MAKE HIM... let go..

so in short.. category #5 is.. (give him the sex of his life.. the way a MAN would enjoy sex..)..

yeah.. I think that pretty much captures a large enough portion of the male population.. i'm not PERSONALLY too thrilled about the whole picture.. but i'm never 100% happy with anything.. that's not to say that most guys won't be please with these modifications.. nearly all guys wish women knew this about men..

[miSSleepy]

Being in the shower with a wet naked woman doesn't turn you on Scorp? Are you sure?? Bubble baths too fall into this. Maybe you're speaking for yourself here. My bf also loves it when I massage his back, while I'm naked too of course.

But in general, you're right. The whole list is skewed more towards what a woman wants - yet ... yet it really makes me wanna puke a little ...ugh

[GrkScorp]

Being in the shower with a wet naked woman doesn't turn you on Scorp?

not really.. but for a variety of reasons..

First off.. a shower is something I have to do to get cleaned up, or just before I leave the house in the morning and go to sleep.. so.. it's something practical..

Secondly.. a shower denotes poverty if i'm not looking at it from a practical point of view.. I mean.. you take showers instead of baths because they're faster.. but.. if you want to have sex.. you want to take your time and get in a well-prepared bath..

Lastly.. being in a shower with a woman sucks.. all they do is wash themselves.. while you stand on the side and have the spashes of soap dry up on your skin.. not cool : (

what does turn me on? alot of things.. but recently.. petite well-toned/fit women in low-cut jeans & thongs/low-riders.. I like to see blue fabric against tanned skin.. I like to see healthy strands of silky hair fall over the smooth soft skin of her arms and neck.. shirts that expose a little bit of the tummy (waist, hips, belly button, etc.).. I'm a huge sucker for the neckline.. legs turn me on.. though strangely enough, i don't have a foot fetish; though I do think they're beautiful (but not sexually arousing)..

my biggest problem.. and this does NOT go for all guys out there.. is that the slightest thing that is "even a little bit off".. will act as such a HUGE turn-off.. so in that respect.. it's very hard for me to find women which I find attractive on a regular & consistent basis..

[GrkScorp]

My bf also loves it when I massage his back, while I'm naked too of course

yeah.. you see.. the funny thing about my back though miSSleepy.. is that it's located on my c0ck.. (that's from Superbad).. I thought it would be fitting.. lol

anyway.. no.. back rubs don't do a thing.. sexually at least.. I mean.. they're always nice if my day is stressful.. but they're not at ALL sexually stimulating.. even if you happen to be naked..

[miSSleepy]

Then don't apply your personal preferences to all men, because I know and know of plenty of them that do get turned on by those things.
And I pity any girl who happens to have an interest in you because she probably won't get the interest in return
I love your honesty and insight in your posts, but you know how people get about generalising.

[Tiay]

hm, gotta say though, 2-3 mintues? yeah, I'd still be as dry as the Sahara after that amount of foreplay, which would make sex suck not just for me but therefore also for him. I think the solution is to have mental foreplay for at least an hour beforehand- then once you actually get to the physical foreplay she'll already be primed, so to speak.

[Illusional]

no, but you complain about women complaining about it
It's so ridiculous, the whole thing! I live with two men (my bf and my father) and with the double male laundry, double male kitchen-mess and double male socks lying around the house, the toilet seat is the last thing on my mind! Seriously, my whole life I just go in and put it down without even THINKING about the issue ..... gahhh

haha it's funny because i only time that i talk about women complaining is when i hear women complain about the toilet seat.

raverboy

[GrkScorp]

hm, gotta say though, 2-3 mintues? yeah, I'd still be as dry as the Sahara after that amount of foreplay, which would make sex suck not just for me but therefore also for him. I think the solution is to have mental foreplay for at least an hour beforehand- then once you actually get to the physical foreplay she'll already be primed, so to speak.

lol.. i'm not talking about the woman & foreplay.. yes yes.. foreplay must go on for a good hour and more.. and lots of mental foreplay before the physical foreplay even begins... but here's the thing with guys..

foreplay doesn't begin for men until the penis starts getting attention... no neck, ears, back, etc BS.. that's all nice and effective for women.. but guys need penis-contact... and that's just for foreplay.. the mistake women do is one of the two:

1. Manual Sex as foreplay (handjobs)... NOT A GOOD IDEA.. most men can't last more than 10mins during sex.. and adding to the stroke count is not helping things..

2. Penis Neglect.. NOT A GOOD IDEA.. yes.. there may be an erection in place.. but that's only there because of visual & auditory stimulation.. in order to keep the pleasure signals going and strong sexual arousal alive (and make sex good for him).. the penis needs contact with visually stimulating parts of your body.. that's really your call.. does he like ur butt? ur etc.. I don't know.. hopefully YOU do..

Just keep this in mind.. what turns YOU on.. doesn't turn HIM on.. and what turns HIM on.. may not exactly work for YOU.. that's why the two of your are the OPPOSITE sex.. So, since he's nice enough to consider pleasing YOU and engage in proper female foreplay before sex.. return the favor with a good 2-3mins of confident sexy teasing (male foreplay).. don't believe me? sit down.. give your man some space and ask him for his honest opinion on this.. (make it clear to him that there will be no physical-emotional punishment from you if he expresses his honest opinion.. you're perfectly willing to do this if he wants it, but just want to know if that's what he wants.. and that this could only change his sex life for the better in the future (no sexual punishment, or making him feel like his demads are WIERD, STRANGE, PERVERTED, etc).. tell me what he thinks)..

[Gribble]

Speak for yourself, Scorp. Women can and have given me raging hard ons without ever touching me or exposing any more skin than usual. In fact, a cleverly seductive woman can achieve far more that way. I can touch my own penis. What I can't do is purr naughty words in a sultry voice that sends chills up and down my spine.

[miSSleepy]

Gribble, Scorp thinks he knows the whole male gender. I have given guys a hard-on without ANY sort of stimulation of the penis, and have kept it up. See my "ears" thread, for an example.

foreplay doesn't begin for men until the penis starts getting attention... no neck, ears, back, etc BS.. that's all nice and effective for women.. but guys need penis-contact... and that's just for foreplay.. the mistake women do is one of the two:

2. Penis Neglect.. NOT A GOOD IDEA.. yes.. there may be an erection in place.. but that's only there because of visual & auditory stimulation.. in order to keep the pleasure signals going and strong sexual arousal alive (and make sex good for him).. the penis needs contact with visually stimulating parts of your body.. that's really your call.. does he like ur butt? ur etc.. I don't know.. hopefully YOU do..

I don't get this...seems like you're contradicting yourself.

[GrkScorp]

Speak for yourself, Scorp. Women can and have given me raging hard ons without ever touching me or exposing any more skin than usual. In fact, a cleverly seductive woman can achieve far more that way. I can touch my own penis. What I can't do is purr naughty words in a sultry voice that sends chills up and down my spine.

re-read my post next time be4 u speak..

"visual & auditory stimulation"... yes.. u can get a hard-on as you call it.. before your penis comes into contact with anything.. you're quite right, (as mentioned in my previous post if you read properly).. but now think of how great sex will be if you have to sit with your woman/girl for more than an hour touching her etc... until she's finally in the mood.. you'll be semi-soft, and jumping right into sex will not be as pleasurabe.. (you'll get hard along the way rather than being hard to start off).. that's because despite you being hard.. you wouldn't have had YOUR MALE equivalent of foreplay..

[GrkScorp]

I don't get this...seems like you're contradicting yourself.

not contradicting at all... READ.. learn to READ... it's an essential skill..

the penis may be (happen to be) erect, [hard-on, boner, etc.].. but that doesn't mean it's feeling good... on the contrary... while he's touching you in places other than your vagina.. you may be getting this feel good "sexual sensation".. but the same doesn't go for him..

pleasure for men doesn't start until the penis comes into contact with anything.. but like i said.. women will either make the mistake of OVERSTIMULATING the penis before sex.. which will decrease the duration of sex.. or UNDERSTIMULATING sex, which will simply not let him enjoy sex to the maximum of their ability since enough tension hasn't been created..

[GrkScorp]

Speak for yourself

I will, because I actually understand how I feel and am able to effectively communicate that.. unless you in fact are also deeply in touch with your body and exactly how you feel and are willing to go in detail about the little nuances..

I mean.. i'm not here for any other reason than to help people.. seriously.. i'm not getting paid.. and I can be practicing my instruments instead of typing.. So there is absolutely ZERO incentive for me to speak anything than what the reality is from a man's point of view..

[Charlie Boy II]

^^^^ wanker.