What is the etiquette of asking for a number

[vashti]

Grk, you definitely ought not give advice for how to approach "cougars".

[GrkScorp]

Grk, you definitely ought not give advice for how to approach "cougars".

Hahaha.. if you're talking about to 25 y/o, she actually got back to me and said she didn't get my messages.. (hard to believe), but it was over the internet, and I don't play online-game.. I talked to her, told her I spoke to a school she wanted to work for, and I was waiting for the principal to get back to me; and if it was good-news, i'd tell him to call her directly.. That was it, end of story, she took the effort to write back, (whatever that means, I could care less, because I had lost interest).. It turns out that on her social networking page, she AND mostly her friends have made it clear that she doesn't "date" or do "relationships".. I could understand the relationship part.. but to not date? wtf?

Aside from her case though, "I ONLY GO AFTER COUGARS".. prized kills at that.. I've never been in a relationship with a younger woman.. ever! And sexually; younger women are horrible (no offense to any younger women).. and as far as demands go, they're not creative, not fun, not interesting, they just don't have much going for them when you compare a kitty-cat against a cougar..

And the mechanism that Blood was talking about is (ASD) Anti-Slut-Defense.. all women have this; but it's actually not triggered by the fault of their own.. it's actually triggered because the GUY isn't socially intelligent enough..

I've seen my friends do this, and i've slapped them across the face and lectured them for hours afterwards.. You can't make "asking for her number" into this "BIG MOMENT", "BIG MOVE" type of thing.. because when that happens, it just feels wrong, and as a woman, you'll feel uncomfortable, awkward, strange.. and BECAUSE you first feel that, your ASD is going to get triggered to protect you from looking & feeling like a slut/wh0re/and easy.. both to others and to yourself.. So instead, it's actually the GUY who is responsible for being smooth about it (not in a player/seducer kind of way). He has to transition things "just right", and lead up to that moment where it just "feels right" to openly give out your number.. as a woman, you should feel near-total comfort & trust in giving it out, as if not anyone else nor you are judging what's going on, as if it's just the normal thing to do in that situation..

So, it's not women that are crazy.. a woman's reputation holds major social consequenses for her.. (In fact, the traditional/classic weapon of choice women use against other women is "calling her a slut").. so it's only natural that women want to protect their social reputation; aswell as their ego (not because doing so would ACTUALY be slutty, but because society has made her feel so).. Therefore, it's not the case that WOMEN are crazy; it's just that HE didn't transition properly into asking you for your number.. so he flipped your switch.. and it's very interesting and impressive you noticed that subconcious reaction & chain of thought..

[vashti]

"Cougars" are generally defined as 30-50 as far as I know, not 25. Also, they are known to do the "hunting" - they aren't sitting around hoping you will approach them.

[TheSphinx]

younger women are horrible (no offense to any younger women).. and as far as demands go, they're not creative, not fun, not interesting, they just don't have much going for them when you compare a kitty-cat against a cougar..

I can't say I agree with this. While I prefer older women for the most part, dating younger women has its advantages as well.

Though rarer than these "cougars," there are creative, fun, interesting young women out there. Often times these characteristics exist in a woman, but she has yet to meet a guy who allows her to express them at such an early age.

A younger woman is usually less likely to be tied down with a career as well, making spur-of-the-moment adventures a lot easier. It's true that this category of woman might not have as much experience, but I find their energy and curiosity about the world refreshing.

To each his own, but I will not disqualify a woman based on her age.

~Sphinx

[Only-virgins]

Yea, I think young women blow when it comes to personality. Only looks they have going for them and no saggy boobies. The rest of them are just plagued with teenage drama.

[GrkScorp]

To each his own, but I will not disqualify a woman based on her age.

Me either; in fact the "kitty-cat" vs. "cougar" category has nothing to do with age.. it's not a category that groups women according to age cut-offs.. they are just two different female-types..

But, it just to happens that kitty-cats (for the most part) eventually do mature into cougars.. so naturally, you get alot of older women being cougars.. (not always the case, just like men, some women never grow up either) [In anticipation of Vash's follow-up to this.. unlike ALL men, only SOME women never grow up.. (generic mysoandrist comment)]

Like Vash said; one thing that I love about cougars is that they do the hunting (but they're still women about it).. They DO actually take on a more "active" role, unlike the completely "passive" kitty-cats..

Examples?

Kitty-cat conversation starters: "Nice tie, I love the Beatles; What's that thing mean on your (shirt, necklace, bracelet, ring)?" And if they can't start a conversation, then they'll stand 3-8 feet away from you acting like they don't notice you (with the hopes of you noticing them, and comming up to their "oh-so-warm-and-inviting-presence" and talking to them)

Cougar conversation starters: "Are you guys gay? What's up with (those pants/that shirt/that hat/etc?" (I like to think of these as test-openers; frustrated women use them when they've just ended a relationship with some wimp, they want to make sure the next guy is sure of himself and not easily pushed-over or startled, I think it's cute.. too bad I don't fall for the content.. only the fact that she had a "motive" to come over and tell me.. when you respond lightly, even jokingly like "Only around you" or "So, my ___ is that bad that you had to walk half-way across the ___ to point it out.. :smile:..".. you signal/imply that the two of you are on the same page; and it's almost instantly "on" at this point.. strait to flirting and getting to know eachother, you totally skip and fast forward through mind-games & testing).. "Hey, is anyone sitting here? Hey, mind if I...? What are you reading?" (These aren't kitty-openers.. these are mature women with enough guts to start a conversation with a guy DIRECTLY, and without looking for a "good enough excuse".. it's says alot right off the start, and gains major respect.. these are women who are actively looking for guys, they've taken the first step because they're too tired to play dumb games at this point, they like what they see and want to get to know you better; BUT, they've made the first step "a big step for a woman to make" so do your part as a guy and follow up from here; take over and lead the conversation, don't make her feel like she's being obvious or too direct; but don't play the role of the clueless idiot either..)

Anyway, I bid you all an early good-night..