...because it's slimey, huh? Has she only ever dry humped....how weird.
Sex is slimey. Wowww.
What's this about not masturbating? Is it an issue if she doesn't? How is this relevant to anything!
To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love; but then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer, to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love; to be happy then is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy; therefore to be unhappy one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you're getting this down.