Should I have to explain?

[ashley89]

I don't think he will get mad, if he really loves and cares about you he will understand and try to work it out with you. it is probably hurting him and he's blaming himself for you not having sex, when really it is something from your past. don't be afraid of him getting mad

[onesexyblonde]

bearz: yes he tells me just about every night how much he wants to have sex with me he says its a way for us to be close ad to really get to know eachother so i just say no not tonight and go sleep on the couch

[onesexyblonde]

I don't think he will get mad, if he really loves and cares about you he will understand and try to work it out with you. it is probably hurting him and he's blaming himself for you not having sex, when really it is something from your past. don't be afraid of him getting mad

i know he loves me and i know he blames himself and i told him its not him but u can tell he doesnt believe me i an tell in his voice

[bearz]

Time to come clean then - if you think you're up to it. Instead of giving him a bj tonight and then sleeping on the coach, talk to him. You two are in this together now and he is probably hurting as well. This isn't fair to both of you.

[ashley89]

i know he loves me and i know he blames himself and i told him its not him but u can tell he doesnt believe me i an tell in his voice

yeah I agree with bearz, you really need to tell him. what do you have to lose? it's not right for him to be blaming himself when it's a bigger issue completely. if you're serious about staying with this guy you need to be able to trust him and tell him big issues like this one.

[onesexyblonde]

i did try to tell him once but i just dont know how to say it and i just panic and leave

[bearz]

i did try to tell him once but i just dont know how to say it and i just panic and leave

It's only the first few words that are the tough ones. Once you get the conversation going with him just let it all out. Just be honest with him, start off with something like "hey, I think I owe you an explanation".

[onesexyblonde]

It's only the first few words that are the tough ones. Once you get the conversation going with him just let it all out. Just be honest with him, start off with something like "hey, I think I owe you an explanation".

im jus so scared and paniky as a guy bearz how would you react if yu were my bf and u were just told this

[bearz]

If I truly loved you, I would support you and be there for you, help you through this and do whatever it takes, because that's what love and a relationship is all about. I'd be glad that you finally explained what is going on and why you are acting the way you do.

But if he's a coward and doesn't really care about you when it comes to hard times, then he's probably going to run for the fence and you'll know that you wasted the last three years on him.

[onesexyblonde]

If I truly loved you, I would support you and be there for you, help you through this and do whatever it takes, because that's what love and a relationship is all about. I'd be glad that you finally explained what is going on and why you are acting the way you do.

But if he's a coward and doesn't really care about you when it comes to hard times, then he's probably going to run for the fence and you'll know that you wasted the last three years on him.

o my god o my god ok ill tell him
and wht do u mean acting the way i do is that supposed to be insulting?

[bearz]

[/B]

o my god o my god ok ill tell him
and wht do u mean acting the way i do is that supposed to be insulting?

No, not insulting at all. I was just referring to you not wanting sex with him, sleeping on the couch, etc.

[onesexyblonde]

No, not insulting at all. I was just referring to you not wanting sex with him, sleeping on the couch, etc.

o ok im sorry i took that too personally

[bearz]

o ok im sorry i took that too personally

No worries. Good luck and hopefully you two can work this out and move forward.

[onesexyblonde]

No worries. Good luck and hopefully you two can work this out and move forward.

thanks i sure hope so too

[Only-virgins]

The reason you don't like sex is because you never had sex. What you had was a case of rape for 2 years. Sorry.