What is the point of monogamy?

[vertical_sky]

Because married men get laid more. They are also healthier and wealthier.

([url=http://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/news/20100224/single-men-have-higher-risk-of-stroke]Single Men Have Higher Risk of Stroke[/url])

When you're single, you're also going to need to do the whole mating dance EVERY SINGLE TIME you want to get laid. That means taking a girl out, romancing her, dining her... it takes time, and money. And there's also no guaranteed pay off. So you're potentially wasting time and money. Yes, you could eventually settle into a relationship. But generally relationships led to monogamy and marriage. So if you choose to break off the monogamy, then you're right back at square one.

Eventually that good looking male is going to get older and lose his looks. When the guy is 50, 60, 70, are the hot women REALLY going to be sniffing up his tree? Maybe if he's incredibly rich, but only then if he's willing to share some (ie, marriage.) Guys who are married, however (HAPPILY married being the important factor) don't usually need to woo their wife with superficial charm. They have years of love and companionship (and if it's a good marriage, happy memories of acrobatic sex) to keep the fires burning.

Yes, single guys potentially get more variety... But married guy gets quantity. They also get stable finances (two incomes, generally), and people to look after them (children, which women USUALLY won't have with a guy who isn't digging the marriage thing.)

Also, evolutionary biology and psychology are complete bs. Just throwing that out there.

[SelflessnHumble]

My reply to you may ruffle a few feathers...and while this is not my intent, please keep in mind that we are all dealing with opinions...(mostly) and not *FACTS* which
cannot be proven to be ethically, morally nor lawfully correct...

(1) YOU have the right: (as your own man)

-to like women...all kinds of women, and to like having a variety of women in your life...and your bed (for any amount of time YOU deem appropriate)
-to feel entitled NOT to stay with one woman and ONLY have sex with that one woman because YOU find it unnatural.
-to feel that the men who have *succumbed* to a marriage proposal: did so via social demands and social intimidation, not out of free will for fear of persecution holding the same "beliefs" as you do...
-to feel a successful, affluent, good-looking man should be able pick any woman at any time (based on his own personal sexual needs) and not those of one woman...

See that? You have the right to feel this way.

(2) YOU DO NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO:

-force your one sided opinion down someone elses throat to reaffirm your personal bigotry (and it is bigotry) when you feel how you feel is more important than how other people feel (in a 2 way relationship)
-Change how people feel, believe, suppose and THINK how a noun SHOULD function so that it fits inline with YOUR view.

Got that?

Now, if a man: genuinely wants to spend his lifetime with one woman: this is his choice.
He does NOT need a vessel (such as marriage) in order to do so.
He does NOT need to conform to YOUR definitions while disassociating himself from conventional ones.

I think the real issue here is:

I have reason to suspect: That You are butthurt because every one of these women you've dated, didn't like how you used them for sex because YOU did NOT feel for them: what they felt for you.
If you did not know:

Women function on emotions...
Men do NOT. (This is common sense 101 right here)

Since you know this: You must also know that a woman who gives up her *vagina* to ONE MAN: usually does so: because she wants to keep him in her life forever.
Because men like you know this fact: you will lie to her: and even (under false pretenses) court her so that she can have the false illusion that you love her, enabling her to *feel* comfortable around this man.

So, since common sense tells us: sex leads to having babies...
It is incumbent for this man to take his required responsibility seriously: to be there for his woman and his child.

If you want a marriage between two people to be recognized by the state: A marriage license MUST be asked for.
If you disagree with this? There is no need for a debate: because we all win. Why?

How you feel: does not mean that another person has to feel the same.
Respecting another person's opinion is what your problem seems to be, making you no different, and no better than someone who shits on your opinion.

[sweetkissesforu]

So why then would a successful, affluent, good-looking, and overall very desirable male (gulp) get married? What is the point? And please don't say childbirth -- b/c childbirth has been around since the beginning of human existence and has nothing to do with marriage. Marriage, at some level, is an institution invented by society -- like Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny.

You wont always be the afore mentioned male age will change that and you will have used woman to end up lonely and old

[sweetkissesforu]

Because he believes that she is the best one? and therefore someone else would be worse and there is no point (and interest) to mess around, especially if you are risking to lose "the best one"?
We like doing presents to those we care about. Can you think of a bigger gift, rather than saying (verbally and with actions) that she/he is the most special and the only one?
People tend to do what they enjoy doing.

(Edited)

Do you think monogamy is for the less lucky guys? Actually, they would have less chances to get into a monogam relationship

yep mr affluent will be old and alone and regret using women

[Lothario]

Because married men get laid more. They are also healthier and wealthier.

Also, evolutionary biology and psychology are complete bs. Just throwing that out there.

Please, I just do not believe that after 3 or 4 or 10 years of having sex with the same woman, the man is still aroused by her. It is simply not possible. You think after being in a 10 year marriage or whatever Joe Blow husband sits at work and fantasizes what he's gonna do to his soccer mom wife when he gets home??? haha, that is laughable and you know it, he's thinking about the new 22yo intern at the office -- you know it and I know it. Sorry if that hurts women, but it is true. Don't take it personally. Having sex with your wife or gf is not "getting laid" -- getting laid is playing the field, hunting, and catching your prey. Marriage/monogamy is you becoming the prey.

Articles like that are cute, but we all know that statistics can be manipulated and presented in any light to "prove" anything. Only mindless drones believe articles like that presented as "proof."

BS huh, that's interesting, denying evolution that is -- kind of like denying gravity.

[sweetkissesforu]

sexist male i relize im labasting why when so blatant

[girl68]

LOL I'm a pawn in "how the world works..." and he's not. LOL my friend if I'm a pawn, we're all pawns in including yourself.

[Lothario]

........

Ok. If you simply point fingers and say THAT IS YOUR OPINION!, well that's fine, but it clearly demonstrates that you have no cogent, logical counterargument. If you do I'd like to hear it. If not than you are free to stay out of the discussion.

I find it interesting that the men around here, even if they disagree, are at least posting good counters, whereas the women (some of them anyway, like SelflessnHumble) are getting all wound up about it.

[VincenzoG91]

So why then would a successful, affluent, good-looking, and overall very desirable male (gulp) get married? What is the point?

Okay, if you're George Clooney, then monogamy doesn't make much sense.

If you're in the lower 99% of the male population, then maybe monogamy is a reasonable idea.

[Lothario]

sexist male i relize im labasting why when so blatant

(yawn...)

[Lothario]

LOL I'm a pawn in "how the world works..." and he's not. LOL my friend if I'm a pawn, we're all pawns in including yourself.

First good point you made all day -- you are right I am a pawn, for now, that is why I am questioning the status quo, not accepting my fate like you...

[SelflessnHumble]

Please, I just do not believe that after 3 or 4 or 10 years of having sex with the same woman, the man is still aroused by her. It is simply not possible. You think after being in a 10 year marriage or whatever Joe Blow husband sits at work and fantasizes what he's gonna do to his soccer mom wife when he gets home??? haha, that is laughable and you know it, he's thinking about the new 22yo intern at the office -- you know it and I know it. Sorry if that hurts women, but it is true. Don't take it personally. Having sex with your wife or gf is not "getting laid" -- getting laid is playing the field, hunting, and catching your prey. Marriage/monogamy is you becoming the prey.

^^^ This posts proves you know NOTHING about people. I think you are laughable and you know that the only way you're able to get a girl in to your bed: is via lying and being someone you aren't because
being who you are hurts too much and the compensatory mechanisms you utilize COULD NEVER stand the test of time in any relationship: so why bother! Right?

Articles like that are cute, but we all know that statistics can be manipulated and presented in any light to "prove" anything. Only mindless drones believe articles like that presented as "proof."

Interesting how you say stats can be manipulated BUT Scientific empirical data could NEVER be skewed to represent certain (and well backed) ideals and theories, right?

Only mindless drones FAIL to utilize original thought and instead rely on what they were TOLD as fact, without conducting research and due diligence on their OWN...

I like how you bypassed my post!
It proves you are a coward. And only attack "easy targets" that hold a view point that you feel is questionable.

[Junket]

You tell 'em bumble bee! It's so amazing how you've invented original thought!

Somebody make this kid a mod!

[SelflessnHumble]

Ok. If you simply point fingers and say THAT IS YOUR OPINION!, well that's fine, but it clearly demonstrates that you have no cogent, logical counterargument. If you do I'd like to hear it. If not than you are free to stay out of the discussion.

I find it interesting that the men around here, even if they disagree, are at least posting good counters, whereas the women (some of them anyway, like SelflessnHumble) are getting all wound up about it.

I predict you will be banned pretty soon, so keep it up.

To clarify; I'm assuredly more alpha male (and infinitely more experienced) than you are based on your one eyed/myopic point of view.
2nd, You don't get it: and this is the point: You feel your opinion is a better one than * You automatically fail.

You were saying?

[Lothario]

Okay, if you're George Clooney, then monogamy doesn't make much sense.

If you're in the lower 99% of the male population, then maybe monogamy is a reasonable idea.

Another solid point. So you agree that if a man has the power/fame/fortune to philander, then it doesn't make sense to commit? Because if so then that is exactly what I am saying. I think most guys just give up because it's tough to be successful -- making a couple hundred grand/year isn't that hard, but being really successful -- wealthy, powerful, influential, and retaining a good physique and good looks into one's 30's, 40's, 50's and beyond, that is very, very tough, and not for the faint at heart. But those guys deserve their success -- and lots of women are a part of that.