how to deal with a possessive girl HELP PLZ

[vashti]

All I can say is that if you are willing to brush off your mom for some idiot girl you've only known for 6 months, she wouldn't be the only one with problems.

Get rid of this girl. She is going to make you miserable.

It's not hard to get rid of someone. You just say "we are through, don't call me anymore you psychotic bitch".

[Aeradalia]

Usually I'd recommend saying it's over face to face... but in this case... text massage, by phone, email, or through messenger would be fine too... anything to put distance between you and her --- physical distance.

The woman scares me...

[Vain]

Yeah man this is an unhealthy relationship that needs to end. I don't believe both people need to get the same out of a relationship; effectively one partner leaning on the other but not a considerable amount. If she expects you to devote your entire day to her, that she is that dependent on you, that she is that obsessive and possessive of you. This is a considerable amount, in fact, it is even above that. If she can't give you space you need then you should not give her your time. Think of the future, if you are unhappy now and nothing changes; how will you feel in another 6 months? Probably twice as unhappy, miserable. In essence just plain off worse. My advice is to end it before it gets worse.

[Only-virgins]

Tell her to **** off.

[Gigabitch]

You're a terrible couple.

She obviously needs more help than you can give her. (I think she needs medical care and possibly some time in a nice hospital.) I'm sure you thought you were doing the nice thing, giving her access to your online accounts, but that was a huge mistake. Every time you capitulate to an unreasonable demand, you effectively tell her that these things are acceptable, which they are not.

You aren't drawing boundaries appropriately. You might think you are, but you're not.

This girl needs help, and I don't think you're actually helping. Break up with her.

[carl1222]

anymore advice?

I don't think there IS any more advice other than to dump her. She's not just over the edge, she's freakin' half-way across the ocean! Not that you're blameless though ... how on earth did you ever let her gain that much control over your life in such a short period of time?

Breaking up with her is NOT easier said than done. Next time she throws a tantrum, lay down the new law:

1) I will talk to my family any time I want.
2) I will help my family any time I want.
3) Unless it's something urgent, I will not respond to your text messages if I'm busy.
4) I am going to try to get my friends back, and I WILL spend a reasonable amount time enjoying their company, even without you.
5) I am changing my password to AIM, MySpace or whatever. Passwords are private, and you have no right to change things on MY accounts.
6) When I am done talking to you on the phone, I will say so, say goodbye and hang up.
7) If this is not acceptable, or if you throw another tantrum about this, consider our relationship over. Period.

You are her boyfriend, not her therapist or her door mat ... start acting like one!

Carl.

[Cbrider]

anymore advice?

Do it sooner rather than later, time only makes it harder to do what you need to do. Trust me, I speak from experience.

[DMan]

Do it sooner rather than later, time only makes it harder to do what you need to do. Trust me, I speak from experience.

you i know what you mean dude its already harder then it is, best bet is doin it on the phone right?

[Aeradalia]

you i know what you mean dude its already harder then it is, best bet is doin it on the phone right?

Sure.. then when she gets controlling... you can just hang up and be done with it.

[Cbrider]

I did it in person, she was upset about it, but was angry more than anything. That was the sign that what I did was for the better. I loved her, but even my heart knows when its done.

[Lahrell]

I think these are the kind of girls you read about in the news.

When they chop off their hubbies pleasure stick .

[jadelil25]

You need to sit down and talk to her. Be honest about how you feel and let her know that your family is important to you. Let her know that you feel like you are getting seperated from your family and friends.

Also tell her how much you love her and care about her. Tell her you are there for her and you dont mind communicating every day but you do need some space and it is something that she needs to accept.

If she does truley love and care about you she will understand! She is not being fair on you and you need to talk to her.

I know it maybe hard, but you need to be harsh and strong with her. Tell her that you need her to do this for things to work. Tell her that it does not mean that you dont love her but you can not loose your family or friends. Also say something like, dont you want to spend some time with your friends.

If she is not willing to listen. I know it may sound harsh but you may have to finish things with her. It is not worth damaging the relationship with your family and friends for a girl friend. Friends are equally as important and they are the ones that are there for you no matter what.

I suffer with depression, my boyfriend knows about it, but I understand it is something that I have to deal with myself. I understand that time apart is important and having time with friends is important. I like to communicate with him everyday and have been insecure but I would never expect someone to give up their family and friends for me.

I am sure that you will work things out. I hope that I have helped.

Good luck