What shall i do now, move on or wait? Is she playing me?

[jammin]

Im trying to move on, every day i wake up thinking of her and going to sleep thinking of her.i never feel any better. I just want to speak to her or get some sort of reply as to why things happened this way. I want to send her a message that prompts her to reply. what can i say. what can i do. I am just so unhappy and i know i should move on. I just love her so much and know that things could have turned out so different. I know messaging her again is probably a bad idea. I havent done so again since the last message. I am just really unhappy and frustrated that this is how it has to be. Is there anything i could say to get a response? I need to understand.

[jammin]

shall i try and call her, its my birthday today, maybe she will answer. i havent tried to call her since we last spoke

[pcmaster]

Forget her. If you wana keep her in your mind than go on and contact her. Realise shes ok now and so should you be too. You have to do things that make you happy just to feel neutral. Work more, live more, eat more. Idle time is killing. The pain will cach you when you sitting.

Actually you might want to check your state of consciousness

If you will understand yourself it will be much simplier to take the right direction

http://www.personal-development-coach.net/personal-development-tests.html

[jammin]

I was going to message her this? What do you think?

i have an empty feeling every morning waking up and you not being there. I have never been in this position before and every day i think about you it never gets any easier. Not knowing makes it so hard for me to accept things. Can you just be honest and tell me exactly how you feel so i can accept whats happening. That is all i ask, take the weight off me. I never want to lose hope, but this hope I'm holding on too is what is dragging me down. If you care for me in the slightest then please do me this

Is this too much? too soppy putting me at a vulnerable position for her to take advantage?

[Valixy]

The way I see it is that if she loved you and missed you, she would simply phone or email you, she wouldn't be able to ignore you... I also think that you have done everything in your power to convince her that you love her but she prefers to be with another guy. This should be enough for you to see things more clearly, but it's now always that easy...I'm sure you sent some texts or emails before thinking that it was going to be the last time but your feelings and pain made you contact her again pretty soon after that. So, if you feel that you really need to contact her one last time asking her for an honest reply it might be that things will get easier for you. So I would say that you should do what you consider best in this situation.

But just for you to know this is what she proved as a person while having a relationship with you: she was capable of putting unreasonable preassure on you and your relationship within weeks of knowing you; she proved to be uncapable of seeing she was wrong or settling for less when she made up for mind about you two; provoked the break up in your relationship and the only thing she could do was wait for you to accept her terms and conditions; when she realised the relationship was not going to go 'her way', she broke up with you and started to see another guy; when you contacted her again, she expressesed some doubts but she was uncapable of leaving the other guy and she ended up becoming silent with you.

She was sefish was all the time. She had no resorces in handling the differences that appeared in your relationship and she never tried to meet you halfway and I think this was lack of love from the start. A woman who loves a man tries to get to know him and build a relationship, waits for him and doesn't rush him into things like that, then she breaks up with him and starts seeing another guy who she ends up preferring in no time.

Writing her one more time or not, receiving an answer from her or not are just options... you WILL start feeling better little by little, just like everyone does but maybe you'll have to help yourself a bit by doing things that you enjoy, meeting new people... Enjoy your day today and may you find your peace and joy soon again!

[jammin]

So i didnt right to her again, she got in touch with me 2 days ago, I havent got back to her yet. It was a short message, asking me how I am. Why would she do this? Shall i message her back. I want to say to her that I am finally not bothered to deal with her shit. I dont have time for it in my life. But i want to tell her over the phone. I want her to know that she has pushed me too far now. Shall i reply back to her message?

[Valixy]

When someone so unreliable, unstable and selfish hurt you and ignored you for so long, it's just fair you to ignore her too. Not even so much as a revenge but because it might prove to be the best thing for you. Some people have even found that when they were finally contacted by their ex in some poor manner like this one, and decided to ignore him/her, it was when they were finally able to move on without the excrutiating pain they felt before. Some breakups can never have a proper closure but in a moment like this you can succeed to find your own personal closure and I advise you to use it like this. She had minimum understanding for you when she was supposingly in love with you, I doubt that she would be able to show you more now by admitting she hurt you and help you to liberate yourself.

Someone I know was recently and finally contacted by her ex who had broken her heart a few months ago. It was a nice loving message and she felt tempted to say thank you at least but resisted it. In the following days she checked his facebook page and saw that he was still openly flirting with other girls, so his ways were unchanged. She realised how awful and low she would have felt at seeing his new flirting messages for other girls if she had replied and let him back in her life even in a tiny way. Instead she felt really good about herself for not replying to him and not giving him a chance to feel good about himself only for being disrespected again.

She doesn't deserve you and she has lost you for good and the right way of showing it to her is by ignoring her. This way you're not exposing yourself to new feelings for her and you don't risk to not be properly understood which could very well happen if you try to speak with her her. You're also avoiding the possibility to be ignored and disrespected again by her with a new surprising silent attitude or finding out details about her relationship that could break your heart even more.

My advice is to not contact her. There aren't many chances that you would feel better about yourself if you did it, on the contrary. Use this opportunity to finally move on and start feeling better about yourself.

This is just my opinion. The decision is yours

[jammin]

so i got in touch with her, saying why did you contact me, what do you want.

She replied - ive been thinking about you more and more since ive come to italy, i know i shouldnt have contacted you but i couldnt resist, I want you to know that i did care and always will.

I replied - i am fine, what your saying to me doesnt mean anything anymore, you have said it all before. You know where i am, im not going into this again with you.

She replied - okay i understand, i just dont want us to hate each other or anything. You didnt do anything bad to me and ive put you through bad times, im really sorry

to that i couldnt be bothered to reply and have just ignored her. It sounds all the same and it sounds bullshit to me tbh. Now i feel better about ignoring her last message. I just replied the once.

[jammin]

my female friend seems to think its all rubbish and she is just playing with my emotions. She said that she didnt have to ask if i have viber, she would have called. And that because she wasnt expecting the message i sent back now shes trying to make things amicable.

[jammin]

if she wants to do anything serious about the situation then she knows where to find me, if she is gonna keep talking the same thing saying she misses me then i am not gonna give her the time of day.

[Valixy]

It seems that she would continue keeping you as a far away second best, if you didn't decide yourself to put an end to this painful situation. I'm glad you're seeing things more clearly now and decided to move on. Hopefully you'll feel much better soon.

[jammin]

Yea it seems like that. We spoke just over two weeks ago and she was saying that she still cares for me etc but she doesn't feel like she can hurt him and leave him etc. which is all rubbish I think. Then she said she will block me on the social networks so she can't see images of me.

Then recently she has kept blocking and unblocking me every few days. I never made contact with her. I can see cos her image keeps coming and dissapearing. Why on earth would she do this. I'm moving on and am feeling much better about the situation. Have started going to the gym and learning a new language to keep busy. And it's doing me good. But why if she is happy with him does she still check up on me? Does it mean anything.

[pcmaster]

Dude you are freaking crazy. Should get out of it faster and you wouldnt be in such a sorry state. she will NEVER come back ! You dont even get 1% of attention the other guys does. Move on find another girl !

youtube.com/watch?NR=1&v=KriZHsiiYPg&feature=endscreen

[Valixy]

Glad to know you're moving on and feeling much better. If you had any doubts about this being the right thing to do, I hope you're seeing things more clearly now. Here you are only two weeks later, being able to live your life again without that constant pain while her situation hasn't changed a bit. She is in a relationship with someone else but wouldn't mind some extra attention for her own ego. The only thing that she is capable to do after breaking your heart and messing with your head for months and most importantly facing the possibility that she has lost you, is to block you and unblock you on social networks while she's hugging the other guy...Should you even bother? If this makes you feel a little bit good about yourself in any way, fine, but otherwise this kind on insignificant attention after all the damage she's done to you should simply leave you cold. It simply shows you how little she can offer you and nothing else.

At this stage you should even reject any idea of a relationship with her for the simple fact that she has been with another man for almost seven months now and I suppose that sharing your loved one with another man has never been your ideal of romance. She cares about you but she doesn't love you, not enough right? It could never work between you two again since she has preferred to be with someone else for so long, you could never trust her again and you would never find with her the love and happiness you had before she messed up everything. You have all the reasons in the world to stop looking back at something that doesn't suit you anymore and keep on the right track. You're the only one that can make you feel good about yourself again and you have just proved this to yourself, and the love you long for has nothing to do with her anymore. Someone else will fulfill it.

[smackie9]

jamm'in, if you want this girl, stop being such a pussy. And that last message to her just pussified you even more...stop contacting her. The trick is the more you show you don't need them, the more desirable you will be to them. If they know they have to earn your attention, they will work for it. So screw it.....you start dating other girls to bring up you value with this girl.....make her think she doesn't have you emotionally.