Want a Second Chance...

[Moe]

Didn't I read a couple posts up about some kind of faith in JC?

Yes that was before she more then once hurt my kids. There was no reason for it and she gave no good reason for it, I asked like a gentleman. You have no idea the damage she did to my daughter. The breakup with me was one thing but she took her dumping me out on my kids. I'm only human.

kai kai
Lol someone got revenge.. but I dont think ur kids will like it

I really don't think she'll be telling a whole lot of people this story would you? I may tell a few in the years to come though.

Do you think getting me to where she worked and trying to jump me was the thing to do. NOT. She's not a kid she's a 35 year old women with three kids who slept with at least 3 other guys maybe more in the 4 months that we were broke-up..
She could have asked to meet me over a coffee or at at her place, Oh her B/F was still sleeping in her bed.
I think it was nothing more then her wanting me to throw him out for her.

[shheadz]

I'm only human.

And so is she. She made some mistakes like all humans do, and now you're no better than her.

Off topic
I'm atheist, and generally have nothing but disdain for organized religion. That's why it get a real kick from people that go to church week after week, year after year, listen to the sermons, praise Jesus, and then without hesitation or thought do something that completely contradicts his teachings.

[shheadz]

She's not a kid she's a 35 year old women

Yeah, and what you did was super mature. Sounds like you deserve each other.

[Moe]

Yeah, and what you did was super mature. Sounds like you deserve each other.

During this whole break-up I always respected her, never talked about her badly to anyone, was never rude by ignoring her, even took her kids out, always up till 7-8 weeks ago answered her text and calls. Even did her a few favors after knowing she was bopping others.
She was rude and disrespectful to me from day one, I accepted it.
BUT my daughter who is not even a teenager yet didn't know why on Halloween this women who she called Mom for more then three years and was called her daughter not by me but by her didn't know why this women when she walked up to her and showed her her costume put the window up in her car put it in reverse and ignored her.
Or when we went to her place of work because it was a place my daughter and I have been going since she was able to walk would go up to her and give her a hug and this women would ignore and say I have to go.

So it's me one bad and it wasn't something I thought about.
Her about 25 in four months all planned and she had time to think hers out.

[kai]

C'mon shheadz, give this man a break. He's happy and I think that's what matters. It was his choice. We can't do anything about it, can we?

[shheadz]

her costume put the window up in her car put it in reverse and ignored her.
Or when we went to her place of work because it was a place my daughter and I have been going since she was able to walk would go up to her and give her a hug and this women would ignore and say I have to go

I still talk to my ex's little sister and her mother on Facebook because they love me to death, and miss me, and I miss them too. But I'm going to start ignoring them pretty soon. Our contact is just a painful reminder of what could have been with my ex, and I need to move on. Does that make me a horrible person?

C'mon shheadz, give this man a break. He's happy and I think that's what matters. It was his choice. We can't do anything about it, can we?

I'm just calling it like I see it. To each his own I guess.

[IncognitoSir]

I still talk to my ex's little sister and her mother on Facebook because they love me to death, and miss me, and I miss them too. But I'm going to start ignoring them pretty soon. Our contact is just a painful reminder of what could have been with my ex, and I need to move on. Does that make me a horrible person?



I'm just calling it like I see it. To each his own I guess.

In your case I can see that making a lot of sense, but not the same in moes' case. This lady was being rude and mean to a little girl who loved her because she was being selfish....plan and simple. She wasnt making an attempt to move on by ignoring the little girl, I hope thats not what you think is it? Lets be real, she was being being a bitch. It is what it is. I hope you can move on Moe, its so hard to believe and understand how someone can just up and flip the script on you like that. Gluck broseph!

[Moe]

I still talk to my ex's little sister and her mother on Facebook because they love me to death, and miss me, and I miss them too. But I'm going to start ignoring them pretty soon. Our contact is just a painful reminder of what could have been with my ex, and I need to move on. Does that make me a horrible person?

I'm just calling it like I see it. To each his own I guess.

Depends on your break up circumstances. Also this was my daughter's actually all my kids mother for 3 plus years. My daughter never knew her Mom. Also her kids love me to death also, she cut me off from them because they wouldn't go back to her after being with me.
Let me be clear until the day she left this women was as close to perfect as you could get. She was the best, worked like crazy, was always there for us and her kids. I can't think of till this day 2 things about her that wasn't good before she left. But there was never a hint, never a complaint nothing. A five minute conversation could have made this much better if we broke up or not. She decided to take the low road and I didn't.
I am the one who asked her not to call me in the beginning and she ignored me, I have not contacted her more then five times in 4 month.
She's a game player, read my past post (other threads) about what I found out about her since the dumping. She still refuses to give my things back that I've asked for at least 5 times now.

I may be wrong but I feel good. I have absolutly no feeling for her any longer. I am I the looser because I loved her to death.

[Moe]

In your case I can see that making a lot of sense, but not the same in moes' case. This lady was being rude and mean to a little girl who loved her because she was being selfish....plan and simple. She wasnt making an attempt to move on by ignoring the little girl, I hope thats not what you think is it? Lets be real, she was being being a bitch. It is what it is. I hope you can move on Moe, its so hard to believe and understand how someone can just up and flip the script on you like that. Gluck broseph!

Thanks you said it much clearer than me maybe.....
It was one day all was good perfect the next day we didn't exist. OK, but being mean to a little girl who was clueless to what was happening was wrong.

[shheadz]

She wasnt making an attempt to move on by ignoring the little girl, I hope thats not what you think is it?

No. The point was my actions -- ignoring them -- could be seen by her family as being rude, but I have my good reasons. Between feeling sorry for himself, and hating her, how much time has he spent trying to see them from her perspective?

I don't think it's possible for someone to become a monster over night, or even over the course of a few months. This was the woman he once thought was so special, that he was in a "dream relationship". I suspect she's just as hurt over the whole thing, and is living in a world of confusion right now. She's doing irrational and bitchy things because her emotions are all twisted up.

[Moe]

No. The point was my actions -- ignoring them -- could be seen by her family as being rude, but I have my good reasons. Between feeling sorry for himself, and hating her, how much time has he spent trying to see them from her perspective?

I don't think it's possible for someone to become a monster over night, or even over the course of a few months. This was the woman he once thought was so special, that he was in a "dream relationship". I suspect she's just as hurt over the whole thing, and is living in a world of confusion right now. She's doing irrational and bitchy things because her emotions are all twisted up.

Maybe but.
I have other post.
I have been approached by at least two of her friends who knew her much longer then I . Both said the same thing that this is how she was before we met. One older friend of hers said she has slipped back to the way she used to be and a lot of her friends thought when she met me she got over her past because she was so happy.
We all know it's easier to fall backwards then to work to go forward. I knew none of the people she knew before we met because she's lived all over the country. She's a runner and I wrote in a past post she even tried to run from here but her last husband wouldn't let her leave the state with the kids.
I just found out by someone in her past who called and sent me a letter from one of her past husbands that she's been married like 4 times and had at least 3-4 other relationships in between and during going from one to the other. One marriage lasting just 4 months another 18 months and another 4 years the longest.
She should be nominated for an Academy award.

[IncognitoSir]

No. The point was my actions -- ignoring them -- could be seen by her family as being rude, but I have my good reasons. Between feeling sorry for himself, and hating her, how much time has he spent trying to see them from her perspective?

I don't think it's possible for someone to become a monster over night, or even over the course of a few months. This was the woman he once thought was so special, that he was in a "dream relationship". I suspect she's just as hurt over the whole thing, and is living in a world of confusion right now. She's doing irrational and bitchy things because her emotions are all twisted up.

I here you. Im sure she is hurt and very very confused in a lot of ways, thats doesnt justify any of her actions though, not as an adult anyway. Seems like her problems run a lot deeper than this relationship with Moe though. Anyway, I wish the best for Moe and the lady, clearly she needs help but now she has lost the person closest to here, so i dunno.

[shheadz]

I have been approached by at least two of her friends who knew her much longer then I . Both said the same thing that this is how she was before we met. One older friend of hers said she has slipped back to the way she used to be and a lot of her friends thought when she met me she got over her past because she was so happy.
We all know it's easier to fall backwards then to work to go forward.

Fair enough. My ex is doing the same. When we met she wanted a change her life. She hated her current boyfriend, and she'd outgrown her immature friends. She couldn't stand the situation she was in. So what did she do after we broke up? Started spending every weekend partying with those friends she had apparently out grown. She's even become friends with her ex's new girlfriend. So one way or another she's invited him back into her life.

I tried telling her that she's taking a huge step backwards in life, but she's stubborn, and finds it easier to slide back into old routines than work towards moving forward.

I still think what you did was horrible though. You took a possibly shattered woman, and broke her into even smaller pieces. You would have felt just as good by stepping back and saying, "You know what? I'm better than you", and then just walking away. I understand it wasn't something you planned on doing, so I'm not going to get on your case about it. It's not even really any of my business. I just hope you don't end up feeling bad for what you did weeks from now.

[Moe]

Fair enough. My ex is doing the same. When we met she wanted a change her life. She hated her current boyfriend, and she'd outgrown her immature friends. She couldn't stand the situation she was in. So what did she do after we broke up? Started spending every weekend partying with those friends she had apparently out grown. She's even become friends with her ex's new girlfriend. So one way or another she's invited him back into her life.

I tried telling her that she's taking a huge step backwards in life, but she's stubborn, and finds it easier to slide back into old routines than work towards moving forward.

I still think what you did was horrible though. You took a possibly shattered woman, and broke her into even smaller pieces. You would have felt just as good by stepping back and saying, "You know what? I'm better than you", and then just walking away. I understand it wasn't something you planned on doing, so I'm not going to get on your case about it. It's not even really any of my business. I just hope you don't end up feeling bad for what you did weeks from now.

It was in no way planned but when she started the sex thing and telling me her crackhead B/F was still home in her bed and her three kids were still there I lost the last little bit of respect I had for her. I couldn't have continued if I wanted to I have respect for myself now more then ever.

Honestly thought I we were going to have a sit down or a talk while she was getting ready for work or a coffee and see if we could talk things out or at the very least start to see if we could start to talk things out.

I have to and demand honesty and trust in my relationship, we the first real date we had more then three years ago I because of my kids laid how I am on the line and haven't changed much since them, nothing major anyway. I sure in the hell am not perfect, she was so much closer to a perfect women then me as perfect man.

It's amazing how much our situation is the same, she wouldn't stay anyplace if there was a hint of a druggie around or an alcoholic now these are her friends, she would make us leave a restaurant if there was a loud person drinking that's how she was again now these are her new really really good friends her words.

I did on more then one occasion try to tell her about these people and she knew it and told me that she was a big girl and could take care of herself. What more could I have done. If she even told me hey this guy I broke up with won't leave my house could you go convince him I would of done that even, or they could have stood with me if she wanted to call the sheriff or after they made him leave I would have stood in my car and just guarded the house.

Throwing the sex around and telling me he was still at her place because he's a looser with no job proved to me she isn't the person she was when we met.
I have still hundreds of letters where she said this was the happiest three years of her life, one only two weeks before she left. No one changes that quick unless they were Bullshitting you.

[LailaK]

That's a horrible thing to do to someone you claimed to love