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Thread: My Girlfriend Has No Dreams, Should I Dump Her?

  1. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by generalx View Post
    We've been together for 3 yrs, she's the manager of a retail store, I myself am a Musician, Writer and Actor, Recently i got into Production and started Filming my own Productions etc, Currently working on a production company and also starting a band in 2010. I'm a bit overweight so i decided to join the GYM 1 year ago, and boy my body is transforming. OH AND I HAVE A REGULAR JOB THAT PAYS MY BILLS.

    "MY GIRLFRIEND" She joined the Gym, Dropped it in a week, She generally goes when i tell her about it, she claimed she would love to learn the piano. "I bought her a piano" The piano been sitting there for almost 2 yrs, She plays it once a week or hire a teacher for 1 or 2 lessons when he have major fights about her lack of discipline, THEN SHE DROPS IT IN A WEEK. She focuses on nothing for more than a week.

    She claims that her job consumes all of her energy and she does have the energy after working 8,9 to 10hrs a day, However she finds the time to sit down watch television, Surf the internet for music videos and movies, Go to her friends house and hang out and go to the mall with her friends and shop.

    I LOVE HER TO DEATH BUT HATE BEING AROUND HER, BECAUSE I LOSE MY DRIVE. Whenever we have fights about her inability to "Discipline Herself to Do things" Her responses are always.

    "QUOTE" Leave me alone, i am happy where i am in life, i don't need to live up to your expectations, I JUST WANT TO ENJOY THE LIFE, I JUST WANT TO LIVE LIFE"

    Yet everyday she's talking about me becoming successful and us living that Celebrity Lifestyle Million Dollar dream house....

    My girlfriend wants to get married and is a very very independent woman financially, she supports me in everything i do, Yet i cannot help but wonder why these things are bothering me.

    My question is.

    WHY IS THESE THINGS BOTHERING ME? IS THE PROBLEM ME OR HER? AND WHY DO I FEEL SEVERLY DEPRESSED AND DISGUSTED WHEN SHE'S AROUND ALTHOUGH I LOVER HER TO DEATH?

    THANK YOU FOR READING..
    Dear Mr. Artist, I am a Mathematician, can you solve this DE for me? What? You ask me what DE is? Can you proof these two spaces are homomorphism? No?
    Why don't you have dreams and all you care is your music and band?
    Seriously, music and work out , which you consider as dreams can be totally useless in other people's eyes. She has skills you don't have and she is not judging you.
    Honestly speaking, just admit that you do not love her any more.
    Last edited by lilsunflower; 18-11-09 at 05:55 PM.

  2. #17
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    Dude, is she your girlfriend or your daughter? Either way I feel bad for her.

    The other day, my close friend came over to my place on the verge of tears. He's never like that - he's a tough guy, usually bottles everything up inside. Well, it turns out his mother called him up and scolded him and basically told him how 'stupid he is' and how he is a failure since he doesn't have a 4.0 GPA like his siblings. He's had a rough college career, and finally realized his passion lies in Christian iconography, so he's studying anthropology. He's actually one of the most intelligent people I know. What I can't understand is why his mother can't realize that despite his GPA when she went to ****in' Harvard and graduated with a 4.0.

    Taking that example into consideration, general, I'd say you lack the empathy that is a prerequisite to love. How can you love your girlfriend when you cannot admire her for who she is? The problem is yours; you're trying to change her and you want her to live up to your expectations. At the same time you're pushing her away from you the same way my friend's mother is pushing her son away. Now that you're confronting the issue you have a choice to make. Are you going to stay with her and accept her for who she is or are you going to break up with her and seek someone that meets your so-called expectations?

  3. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by doppelgaenger View Post
    What I can't understand is why his mother can't realize that despite his GPA when she went to ****in' Harvard and graduated with a 4.0.
    Sorry to stereotype but, is your friend asian?

  4. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sanctuary View Post
    Sorry to stereotype but, is your friend asian?
    ROFL I almost asked the same question

  5. #20
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    It's possible you two are just going in different directions. If you're trying to change her, that's not a good thing, but you could still love her because you two have a history together.

  6. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by generalx View Post
    We've been together for 3 yrs, she's the manager of a retail store, I myself am a Musician, Writer and Actor, Recently i got into Production and started Filming my own Productions etc
    So she's a head honcho at a store is she? Good for her.

    Currently working on a production company and also starting a band in 2010. I'm a bit overweight so i decided to join the GYM 1 year ago, and boy my body is transforming. OH AND I HAVE A REGULAR JOB THAT PAYS MY BILLS.
    Which is what exactly? So far, it looks like it's her with the regular job that pays her bills. I have a regular job that pays the bills. does that mean I can give myself a pat on the back too? lol

    "MY GIRLFRIEND" She joined the Gym, Dropped it in a week, She generally goes when i tell her about it, she claimed she would love to learn the piano. "I bought her a piano" The piano been sitting there for almost 2 yrs, She plays it once a week or hire a teacher for 1 or 2 lessons when he have major fights about her lack of discipline, THEN SHE DROPS IT IN A WEEK. She focuses on nothing for more than a week.
    No, she doesn't stay interested in what you like in a week. big difference. I'll give her credit for at least trying to get interesting in what you are interested in, because if I were a girl and was your girlfriend, I would have told you to **** off.

    She claims that her job consumes all of her energy and she does have the energy after working 8,9 to 10hrs a day, However she finds the time to sit down watch television, Surf the internet for music videos and movies, Go to her friends house and hang out and go to the mall with her friends and shop.
    As chimp4u already mentioned, how much energy does it take to do all of the above? I know somebody who works 12 hours a day lugging and slugging 200 pound pumps and still manages to watch tv, surf the net, and even go over to his girlfriend's house to keep her happy. Obviously you have no clue what RandR is, because the only stress you have is twinging a guitar and scribbling down notes, while she's lugging and slugging boxes, climbing ladders and stools, dealing with bitchy customers all day, babysit some employees, e.t.c, so she is entitled to some relaxation, you idiot.

    I LOVE HER TO DEATH BUT HATE BEING AROUND HER, BECAUSE I LOSE MY DRIVE. Whenever we have fights about her inability to "Discipline Herself to Do things" Her responses are always.

    "QUOTE" Leave me alone, i am happy where i am in life, i don't need to live up to your expectations, I JUST WANT TO ENJOY THE LIFE, I JUST WANT TO LIVE LIFE"
    Sadly, that quote is spot on and right. She doesn't have to live up to your expectations, and if she is happy where she is, then all the more power to her.

    Yet everyday she's talking about me becoming successful and us living that Celebrity Lifestyle Million Dollar dream house....
    Don't we all dream about that?

    My girlfriend wants to get married and is a very very independent woman financially, she supports me in everything i do, Yet i cannot help but wonder why these things are bothering me.
    Because it's obvious that you are a control freak

    Honestly, generalx, you have no idea how much of a douchebag you look like right now because you are bitching about your woman being financially independant and having a mind of her own. That's alot of guys' dream girl because they are not working to support himself and her spending habits, and can actually give you a second look and be able to tell you a certain idea is stupid or not.

  7. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by generalx View Post
    We've been together for 3 yrs, she's the manager of a retail store, I myself am a Musician, Writer and Actor,
    You're also a Wanker, for capitalizing those words. You take yourself far more seriously than you should. You need a groupie, not a girlfriend.
    Spammer Spanker

  8. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gigabitch View Post
    You're also a Wanker, for capitalizing those words. You take yourself far more seriously than you should. You need a groupie, not a girlfriend.
    heh i love that word. wanker.

  9. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gigabitch View Post
    You're also a Wanker, for capitalizing those words. You take yourself far more seriously than you should. You need a groupie, not a girlfriend.
    LOL Wanker is a great word. Very fitting.

    Again, part of that "Big Hollywood" persona. I am willing to bet he crashes and burns in a few years while he bawwwwws at his girlfriend to pick up the shattered remains of his ego.

    I hope she steps on his ballsack in pointy stilettos on her way out the door with her newer, hotter, less-botoxed, more sensible boyfriend.

    How come this guy hasn't posted back yet?

  10. #25
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    What a troll. LOL. Does LA pay these tards to come on here and get the forum going, or what?

    BTW, does someone *really* ever need a reason to dump someone, other than they want to? It might make them an ass for doing it, but I don't think there's any requirement to explain oneself.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
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  11. #26
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    ^ If you've been dating for two weeks, no. No requirement is needed.

    However, if you've been dating for 6 years, I think SOME explanation is owed. If you don't offer one (it helps with closure sometimes), that person is a tool.

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