I was suicidal when I met you. You loved me cause you believed that Im good but it was not the person you think I was. When I said I love you it was actualy someone else I loved. I just wanted to say these words and you was there to listen. Afterwards I said I love you only because you expected and wanted to hear it. I noticed how you changed and how much you wanted to be with me. Just my touch was a lot for you. You was all exited but you were alone in your dream world. I didnt see you more than a friend. My heart was broken. I couldnt love. You took all the shit that previous girl gave to me. I saw you crying when I hurt you but couldnt feel for you. When you cried thats when I felt loved, when you begged I said no and your tears gave me confidence.
But destroyed you. I didnt belived in myself but you did all the way. Your love bring me back to life and healed my broken heart. But it healed without you in it. I didnt had to earn your love didnt had to change myself. You just needed someone to love and your love came easy. I was just a shit but you saw reflection of your perfection in me and loved it thinking that its me who is amazing. You did a lot for me but I cant say the same about myself. You were lonely for a long time and you had a lot of love to give. You didnt understand how it can be that you are treating me so good but I didnt apreciate it and treated you like a shit. Its because the best place of my heart I gave to someone else. Previous girl played with my heart and didnt gave it back when she left. With my heart gone was everything that was in there - dreams, hopes, love and warrior soul and even faith in god. I never changed myself for anyone except myself but I changed everything about myself to like that girl all the bad and good things. All the rules was broken. I was not the fighter anymore. My weakness caused your pain. Your pain made me feel good. Like Im not the only one suffering on this planet. I saw you going insane just like I did with previous girl. This pain was killing you. It would take just a few words from me to make you feel better but no. Zero fcks were given. My black heart couldnt feel for you. All I cared about was my addictions. I will never do all the crazy things I did for the girl I loved. And I know you will never do what you did for me to other guys. I cannot ask you to forget about me it would be too much to ask. But life is fair and I know you paid for your future happines with the pain you took from me. Believe me I know your life would be better if you never met me. Perhaps thats what happens when angel meets deamon.
Last edited by pcmaster; 17-10-13 at 06:31 PM.
Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will