exgirlfriend broke up with me for a much older guy. can I get her back

[Chris219]

My ex girlfriend broke up with me and I don't know exactly why. She told me once she just didn't think it was going to work out and didn't know if she would ever feel completely right about us being together. She has told me that she loves me and thinks I'm great but isn't sure we should be together. We said our goodbyes and she has completely cut me off....even social media. She has not tried to contact me in any way since and it has now been 5 weeks. I do know that she is now seeing an older man, 23 years older than her. She is 26 and this new guy is 49. I'm a few years older than her also but not by that much. I'm 37. When we were together she told me about this guy and said they were only friends. He would ask her out for drinks and to dinners and even went hiking together. She said this guy was just a friend and not a threat to me as she said he was a smoker and has 2 kids (one of who she said was almost her age) and been married and divorced twice. All of these things she has always said she wants nothing to do with especially smoking! I myself are none of these things. Why would she break up with me for him if he is all the things that she said she doesn't want? I don't understand it at all. Do you think she will ever contact me again? We have no spoken to each other in a few weeks. I did try and reach out to her to get back together but she said she wasn't interested at this time but maybe one day if our paths cross again she might want to. I really have fallen in love with her and I'm not sure what to do. Advise? Is no contact the way to go? Will this make her want to call me or will it make her want to get back together? Help!

[breathe123]

Why do you want someone who can easily drop you out of their life? people we care about or love we don't ignore for 5 weeks, that is her answer to you, you aren't a priority and she moved on. Sorry.

[Chris219]

Well because I really felt we had a great connection. Same interests and sense of humor. I really love her and she was even telling me she loved me after we broke up. I just don't get her wanting to be with this old man and all of the things he brings with him that she said she didn't want in her life. I want her back! So do you think she will miss me enough or was I even special enough to her to contact me again? Is this new guy a rebound? I just think she is the one for me

[breathe123]

I don't know as of now it shows she doesn't miss you & if she hasn't tried contact with you for over a month, the older man could have already been someone she was involved with during your relationship & they took it to a more involved level when she dropped all contact with you.
It's up to you if you reach out and keep trying with her & maybe at some time she will give you closure so you can stop trying.

[TablesandChairs]

You're 37; she has time to play around but it's about time you stop wasting your time. She dropped you like a hot potato, hooked up with a 'friend' not long after and has cut off all contact, even social media. What does this tell you? It tells me she's moved on.

For a relationship to work, both people need to feel the connection - you're feeling something she isn't - if she did, she'd be with you right now. It's not complicated and she's actually made it very obvious...but you keep referring back to your feelings. Those feelings aren't relevant if they aren't shared. I feel for you, unrequited love sucks and it leaves you in that state of limbo for a while...but the best thing for you to do is give yourself time to get over it, then get back on the dating horse.

[relationship55]

Seems like she was cheating on you and this was all planned. I highly doubt she was "just friends" with this new guy

My best advice for you would be to move on. I know it's going to be a hard thing to do, but she let you go instantly. That's not what people who love you do.

[Chris219]

Thanks for the replies. I guess I will have to try and move on. I just don't understand it though. He is 49! This will never last as she wants kids and a family. There is too much of an age gap. I really believe she is wasting her time with this. She will not admit to me that she is in this other relationship. Why is that? I think this why she will not talk to me anymore. She will however answer texts but no phone calls.i haven't tried to contact her in a few weeks though. I think she is trying to hide it from me because I had a huge problem when we were together about her "hanging" out with this guy. Is she just "playing" me since she told me she stills loves me? It hurts to hear her say that but for some reason it gives me a small glimmer of hope. I just don't understand how a person can cut you off so easily and forget about me. I thought I was a major part of her life. We literally went from talking all day via phone calls and texts and snapchats to nothing. It just hurts. And I just wonder if she will ever call me again? Even to see how I am?

[relationship55]

Maybe she won't admit it because she doesn't want to look like she cheated on you, i'm not sure why she won't admit it actually..

I don't think their relationship will last to be honest because of the age gap. On top of that he has kids, so it will be hard for her to become he "mom" figure because she's so young. This is a sticky situation.

[Chris219]

So is there any hope at all? Anything I can do other than leave her alone and see if she misses me enough to contact me? Why would she be with this guy if she totally against smoking? Or was that a lye to make me believe she would never want to be with him? It makes zero sense to me. Her actions and behavior are nothing like what I knew of her. Acting completely different. But again can anyone she'd some light on how a person can just cut you out of there life from one day to the next and be in another relationship so quickly? Was I just not really ever a priority or important to her as I thought? Also back to the original questions...will she ever contact me or should I try and contact her again at some point? And is there any chance of getting her back in my life?

[moneyspills]

It's up to you if you reach out and keep trying with her & maybe at some time she will give you closure so you can stop trying.









[url=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aGBuSgosGy4]Text Messages to Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back[/url]

[purple_roses]

People lie...
And sadly I don't think its a good idea to beg for her back or bother her. She clearly doesn't want to get back together since she has you deleted off social media. Her reaching out to you would be a sign maybe, but she's not. I would really do what's right for yourself and move on completely from her. The breakup is new, it's going to hurt. You are going to feel lonely. We all feel that way. Doesn't mean we should all obsess over our exes. They are exes for a reason and she cheated on you many times. I don't know why u want to lower yourself to that level.

[breathe123]

moneyspills if you like what I say you can add me I think my first reply was better tbh unless you are an automated bot that pulls text out in threads randomly.

Chris219 if you are going crazy not knowing text her but how will you feel being ignored again if not reply comes back to you?

[Chris219]

Well as ive said before she has always answered my texts but doesn't want to talk on the phone. I really think if I text her she would reply but may not give me an answer. The last time I texted her,3 weeks ago, she got really upset and stopped texting cause she didn't want to answer "personal" questions. Doesn't she at least owe that to me to tell me she is with this new guy that she was seeing before breaking it off with me? Is she embarrassed or feel guilty? Is that why she hasn't tried to contact me because all my assumptions were right about this new guy and her? I don't know if I will reach out to her or not but I just can't figure out how people can do this to someone they say they love. How can you just cut them out of your life completely and not feel bad or want to know anything about what I'm doing or how I'm doing after being together. Just doesn't make sense and it hurts pretty bad