My girlfriend doesn't seem to care about my pleasure... Please advise.

[johndoe365]

We only recently officially became a couple and only had sexual active three times. Each time I think the goal was intercourse, but various things prevented that, so wbat ended up happening was that she had a good time because I provided oral, but I ended up with nothing. Too be fair, the first time I couldn't get it up, the second we were interrupted and the third she was having some pain related to her period so she didn't want penetration, but was fine with me giving oral. So I did, and was hoping for reciprocation but she didn't make a move. In fact, all three times she's been content with me giving her oral and didn't really seem to care about my pleasure.


What should I do?

[lalalita]

Some people are honestly just clueless. They don't mean to be selfish on purpose, they just aren't very sexual minded. On the other hand, some people are consciously selfish, and want their bread buttered but have no desire to please their partner.

Which she is, I can't say. But, I do understand how frustrating this can be.

Talk to her about it. Communication is so important in so many facets of a relationship. Don't go about it in accusatory way. Maybe not even mentioning you think things are unfair - not yet. You can try mentioning "I love going down on you, it turns me on a lot and I would love to feel your mouth on mine too." just to see how she reacts. If she truly just isn't realizing, this should be all it takes. If she has some reserves about it, now would be the perfect time for her to speak up.

If you try this and things are still one sided, then it's time for straight talk and time to bring up the things you do for her and how she never pleases you.

[dontaskme]

You gave her oral while she had her period?

[johndoe365]

You gave her oral while she had her period?

No, her period ended a few days before; she was having some post-period pains.

[woody]

Your both new to this intimacy with each other. Give it time. Both of your bodies are just getting comfortable; getting to know one another. For many couples in the beginning, sex (though it can be amazing right off the get go) for many the comfort levels take some time. Natural.

Yet in some time, if things are still very one sided, yes you must talk with her.

Often, when the sexual connection is not there it is the Universes way of telling us there's a better match out there with someone else.
Good matches mean great sex, great friendship and a natural state of being.
If you really like this girl, give things some time and see how it works.