Boyfriend ,15 years older than me, doesn't want sex?

[MochaKitty80]

Perhaps I am exaggerating this whole situation but I'm trying to wrap my head around his excuses as to why we don't have sex that often.

I am 28 he is 42. He's a busy man, being a doctor and all so I figured that's the reason he didn't want sex. When I talk to him about it, he says he's tired, stressed and just not in the mood. He is cuddley with me, he's a great guy, he just doesn't look like he has the energy anymore for sex. We've been together for over a year and a half, I live with him and we have no real relationship issues. He even described himself as possibly not having the "testosterone" he once had, which is obvious, but he stated he would never try a hormone therapy as it has way to many bad side effects.

I have seen on his computer that he watches porn, so it gets me worried he's not into me sexually anymore. He doesn't have the hormones to have sex with me but he does to jack off to porn? What gives?

I've trieda few things.... I accidentally let myself fall out of my top. I walk around naked. I go into the shower with him to tease him. I'll say flirty things to him but he doesn't respond back the same way. He'll hug me and rub my breasts or grab my ass, but that's as far as it goes nowadays. When we sleep he does hug me and hold me close to him but nothing else.

So here I am, a young hormone raging woman wanting sex more than my much older boyfriend... I don't know what to do. I know we love eachother very much but this no sex thing is driving me crazy! And no, I can't masturbate, it does nothing for me as I know I'm touching myself so it's not a turn on....

Any opinions on this? What am I to do? I'm afraid of the worst which is him cheating on me

[Belleann]

I'm just going to be blunt and I may be 1000% wrong and I truly hope I am but I think he's full of $***. I dated someone who's a doctor who has a specialty practice, he also has two children so talk about having "no time" plus he's older than ur guy but he has absolutely no problem with having sex. Hell, he's the best lover I've had since my ex-husband and I'm even ranking him above that in many areas.
If he truly had a low testosterone problem=low libido=No reason to watch and masturbate to porn. My eyebrow is raised, you might want to investigate a little further and really try to see what's REALLY going on with him.

[peterwong]

He might be into some kinky-shit that you can't offer him.

[basilandthyme]

This has nothing to do with his age or testosterone....and everything to do with the fact that he'd prefer to whack off to porn than have sex with you.

Time to cut this one loose.

[smackie9]

A year and a half.......the honeymoon period of the relationship is over.....you have nothing truly in common, so there isn't enough there to keep him interested in you anymore. Let me guess, you are hot Asian girl that he uses as arm candy.

My recommendation....find someone that is more age appropriate, and stop chasing the money. You will find more happiness.

[vashti]

I'm afraid of the worst which is him cheating on me

Of course, it IS possible. At least half the doctors I work with have women on the side.

But I am guessing he is just more interested in porn.

[lalalita]

You might be over saturating him with sexuality during your attempts to get a sexual reaction out of him. Have you tried backing off entirely? No flirting, no walking around naked, no nothing? Letting him come to you?

[dontaskme]

Nothing to do with being busy, he is more into porn, IMO.

[Wakeup]

Tell him you really love your life with him but you're young and you need steady sexual attention so is it okay if you get yourself a piece on the side.

Then, come back in here and tell us what he has to say about that... we'll continue the discussion after knowing how he would feel if you were loving him and just having sex with another(s).

[Belle's]

How often do you want to have sex? Sex is very important part of a relationship if you think you're not getting enough then that is problem. One of you has to adjust to the situation. He's a busy doctor so either he cuts his work hours or you just have to get use to what he can give. I don't think he's cheating though I don't think he has the time for it lol!