This girl has me confused.

[Trine]

Hello.

I need help figuring out this girl because I'm rather confused by her actions.

When we bump into each other we always smile at each other and say hello and this can happen several times in a single day as we work together in the same office building. I've tried striking up a small conversation with her on a few occasions and the first time I tried to get a conversation going she seem shocked I actually spoke to her, blushed and gave me a few one word answers before saying bye and rushing off, she couldn't get away fast enough lol. She's not too bad now, we can converse for a few minutes and she's fine, she smiles, but she'll never initate a conversation with me and the other day I was standing near her and she had her head down looking at the floor messing around with some papers and only looked up and began talking when I asked her how she was. She is able to speak to plenty of other people, she laughs and jokes around with them, but seems unable to do that with me. She paid a compliment to me saying that I am sweet and I liked that, that made my day, I was walking around with a huge smile on my face, but I'm confused by her actions.

As you've probably guessed I'm attracted to her and want to know if she likes me?

Thanks for reading,

T.

[smackie9]

Could be one of two things, she really likes you, and it makes her shy or she knows you really like her and it makes her uncomfortable. The only way to find out is to up your game, and eventually ask her out or exchange numbers.

[Trine]

I'll try speaking to her more, asking her non-intrusive questions, I'll try and break the ice with her with more and hopefully she'll become comfortable around me, I'd hate to feel like I was making someone else uncomfortable. If she comes out of her shell more and is more responsive and comfortable then I'll ask her if she wants to go out.

[smackie9]

There's a trick to this. If you handle the situation with kid gloves, you will get friend zoned. A shy person is more responsive to a person that is confident and takes the lead boldly. So don't slowly work the crap out of this for weeks.

[Ann32]

If you don't think she has a bf and she's talking to you then I think you should just ask her out. You could do something casual like drinks after work.

[Trine]

If I can catch her own her own for a few minutes when I next see her I will ask her if she wants to go out and that way I'll get my answer. As for her having a boyfriend; I have no idea, I know virtually nothing about her. As I say she is very quiet around me and around other people she is talkative and doesn't appear to be shy.

My only slight concern is that if she is uncomfortable around me and I ask her out and she isn't interested then things could get awkward but then I suppose that's just the gamble I have to take.

[smackie9]

That's the risk you should be willing to take. You can't have opportunity if you don't take it.

[Trine]

I asked her out recently and she spun the classic "I'm too busy" line. So I guess she wasn't interested after all lol.

[smackie9]

Rule of thumb....if you are confused about the signals you are getting from a girl, you are friend zoned.

[Trine]

Rule of thumb....if you are confused about the signals you are getting from a girl, you are friend zoned.

I don't accept friendship from women, so she can friendzone me all she wants, she's rejected me, so I've moved on to the next girl. There is no friendship on my part - I have been remaining civil with her but that's it.

[smackie9]

I never said you were being friends or to accept it, just saying if the signals are not clear, there is no real interest then.

The only true way to find out is to ask them out. No confusion then.

[MapleAshes]

Just chin up and directly communicate with her about it. If you don't take a chance, you have no chance.

[nico88]

She sounds shy to me. Maybe a lil self conscious. I'd small talk with her a lil more until she gets more comfortable with you then ask her for drinks after work one night and see what happens..

[Trine]

Well after the rejection, she was distant and seemed like she was avoiding me, but I never took it personally, I understood that the situation was difficult for her so I just remained polite to her as I have no hard feelings towards her. Well recently she has been very much in my vicinity.

An example of this would be a time when she walked right up to me, stood next to me, looked down at the floor and never made eye contact and never spoke. I looked at her and didn't really know what to do or say, so I walked away and she walked away soon afterwards.

I'm just confused by her actions, she's clearly shy and uncomfortable around me and I don't think I'm helping matters by not speaking to her in the above incident, but I just can't figure her out.