is this love impossible or not ? has it ended ?

[loverman1]

Yes she uses me, unintentionally, but I can dig that. Thankyou for the last 2 responses, a little more positive.

Being faithful, is being faithful to your own heart and following it, This is what being faithful means, my opinion.

[surfhb2]

Yes she uses me, unintentionally, but I can dig that. Thankyou for the last 2 responses, a little more positive.

Being faithful, is being faithful to your own heart and following it, This is what being faithful means, my opinion.

Wrong! She uses you intentionally.

Your opinions on faithfulness are out of whack too

Your heart and mind must agree....but you seem to ignore that for whatever reason

[loverman1]

intentionally or not, I know her well enough to understand her. She's so very emotionally sensitive, its just the way it is.

My opinions on faithfulness are from this wise man called mooji, a Buddha. Heart and mind yes, so anyone can choose there own path for themselves without judgement.

[pcmaster]

Dont know man I think you are getting only leftovers from this girl. Other guy is fcking her and having it all. While you seems to be happy by whatever you can get.

[surfhb2]

intentionally or not, I know her well enough to understand her. She's so very emotionally sensitive, its just the way it is.

My opinions on faithfulness are from this wise man called mooji, a Buddha. Heart and mind yes, so anyone can choose there own path for themselves without judgement.

Enjoy being single

[Valixy]

Being faithful, is being faithful to your own heart and following it, This is what being faithful means, my opinion.

Being faithful to your heart means being able to discerne what's right and what is wrong for you and being able to take the right decision. Suffering for someone who is in a relationship and has been keeping you away for two years is not love, it's weakness because you are unable to understand that she is not the right person for you and move on. Unconditional love is felt for your children, or for life and human beings in general, but for a relationship to survive you need to share the same love and similar values.

Of course that you don't have to judge her, but you have to be able to detach from your unrequited feelings. Buddha taught about detachment, by the way, and not about the impossibility to deal with your own feelings and being caught up again and again in the illusion of your uncontrolled emotions. You seem to be valuing more the false hopes you've built around this woman than your emotional wellbeing and freedom. Is this love or personal weakness, what do you think? Start walking your own path and leaving behing wrong emotional attachments is not easy, but it's the only way to grow as person, become stronger and happier in the long run.

[loverman1]

8 months ago, we broke up after she told her guy "I have met someone else" but she couldn't leave, it was too hard. Then her guy changed, he acted for a few weeks so she choose to stay with him, I didn't just get dumped, that's deciding the person is just not right for you, and it was never like that.

If its unrequited then I understand my story is over, but there have been many signals that its not like that at all. In the relationship and out of it.

Over the last few months we have talked more openly. "Is the Woman in front of you not enough" ... "don't you know how I feel" ... I can imagine being with you but its too hard" ... " "do you want to know what I hold inside my heart" .... "I will never tell you what I hold inside" ... "sometimes when a woman says no she means yes" .. "we could rotate if we meet" " I opened my heart for you"

Many things like this have come up in conversion from her. I have had unrequited love before, both ways, I'm sure this is not it. I'm not saying she loves me I'm just saying we are a good match, and love would be possible.

My best guess is, She really likes me, or has deep feelings. But its not enough to leave behind her family life, its too hard to start again. our future would be the unkown, its more easy to stay with him than to be with me, her kids accept her guy, even if he's sometimes bad. She cant take his temper, she's very sensitive so she reaches out sometimes not knowing what to do, she considers me, but considers is not enough. As soon as I threaten her relationship with him, she has to choose, and chooses him.

I understand it may never happen, the chances are small. But Im sure we are a good match, well suited. We go together very well, and we never get bored of each other. She has told me things she has never told her partner.

My plan was the spend break times with her as friends, and she can come back if she wants, if not we are friends like before. I guess she did almost come back, well consider choosing me. But i'm 65% sure it wont happen. She's the closest match I have found, but I understand it probably wont happen, about one in three chance. A love I probably wont have.

and she's a very good girl, I do have a kind of unconditional love for her, like she's in my family, its just the way it is.

My hope is not false, its just I hope a little too much.

This is my best guess.

[pcmaster]

I can imagine being with you but its too hard"

Hear this once from a girl and it was total turnoff. The girl wasnt even pretty but with this she made it clear its over. Guess girl you like are gorgeous so you dont see how bad is to say this.

My best guess is, She really likes me, or has deep feelings. But its not enough to leave behind her family life,

Yes, dont waste time here.


Use this to move on.
loveforum.net/threads/85672-Guide-How-to-deal-with-breakup

Then use this to find a new girl.
loveforum.net/threads/85674-Guide-on-interacting-with-girls

[loverman1]

What I understand is - we like each other, both ways. If she was single, we would have a real shot. But we cant be with each other, its not possible. She does change her mind often, weekly, Its like a roller-coaster. But I understand the chances are quite small. And her partner does actually love her, even if he can't make her happy in the long run. This is what I know...

[IndiReloaded]

Great video, PC. Holds true for women as much as for men, btw.

Loverman - you are focused on the wrong question. Even if she thinks she loves you (that's subjective and probably doesn't mean what you want it to mean), she isn't willing to do the work required to be with you.

Why would you want to put more effort into someone than they are willing to put into you?

- - - Updated - - -

What I understand is - we like each other, both ways. If she was single, we would have a real shot. .

*If* she was single... but she's not.

Did you watch the vid? Stop projecting what you want from what IS, man.

[loverman1]

There must be more to love than just being together, my success, is not based upon being together with her, its based on being there for her, being with her through life at the present moment, while we are working together.

Everything is realized through my experiences with her, it cannot be judged or told through half a page on this forum, with that being said, my post was a mistake, poorly written, I didn't state our experiences over the last two years, I even asked her to marry me.

I agree with one thing being stated on my post, that it probably wont work out in terms of being together, however I will cherish the time we have been given in my factory. We will be what we are meant to be, perhaps time is on are side to discover this.

I realize from everything she has said that we are a good match, we are suited and always will be, with this being realized it can be said that we could be together, its just that circumstances are against that. How does she feel about me, well she can't tell me, so lets leave it at that.

Does she use me, perhaps, but doubtful, even if she does its only to over come emotional pain, and she's forgiven. She's been my best friend, and the best match I have found in adult life.

My post has ended. Thanks