A woman I've been dating and like a lot canceled our date on the day saying she was s

[thomasmcguire2]

A woman I've been dating and like a lot canceled our date on the day saying she was sick. Pls read the details and see if you can help?

All opinions are welcome. Be brutally honest

known each other a month, been on three successful dates and became intimate which was a surprise to me. This date was supposed to be the more comfy kind at home.

3 dates went well we said we both enjoyed each others company. Texted regularly, flirty and nice things. I started to like her, she said she liked me too.

the week leading up to this date I sent a few sweet texts and she responded but said she wasn't used to getting compliments. On Weds we arranged to meet on the Fri eve.

- So she texted very early on the fri morning with a long elaborate text saying she was sick canceled all plans & was going to sleep all weekend. Said sorry and few alternate days for the next week.

- I responded with, 'seriously? whats really the problem'
- She then texted and said she was really sick.
- I texted with 'if you cared you would just show up for a hour, or talk on the phone'
- She responded very aggressively saying I had now annoyed her etc
- I said 'sorry I cant be played around like that'
- She said she was not playing & was sorry. Haven't spoke since.

I admit I was a bit upset because I did like her and thought we had something.
I'm back to dating after a relationship, but I know basic alarm bells. Like if they are interested they never cancel.

I'm confused and upset. I'm not a kid, my head says she got a better offer from some playa. But it also might have been genuine.

What do you guys think & wat shud I do? Dont want to appear any more needy than i have. I feel so hurt &stupid!!

[searock]

WTF... she actually told you that she was happy to meet you in a few days, she even told you precisely which days worked for her. You were a douche for assuming she was lying to you. No wonder she's pissed. I think no matter what you do now, the damage's done. You showed your true self - untrusting, insecure, passive-aggressive. I think it's over with her.

Oh and obviously if it actually was a lie, it's still over.

[smackie9]

I agree you are an insecure passive aggressive douche. If you did that to me I would drop you like a hot rock. If she asked for my opinion I would tell her you are a huge red flag and run for her life.

[thomasmcguire2]

I agree you are an insecure passive aggressive douche. If you did that to me I would drop you like a hot rock. If she asked for my opinion I would tell her you are a huge red flag and run for her life.

There is a little bit more to this.. I may as well be honest..
The funny thing is.. I wasnt being myself, Im not normally like that at all. The opposite in fact, usually the girl has to give me a wee push to show interest. lol.

And This is the weird thing...... I was thinking of canceling because I had a bit of a bubbly tummy. lol. So Im new to all this again and I looked up a blog that said should I cancel a date... It said the guy never ever cancels... etc etc. So the next day when I got the text I over reacted I thought here we go, and replied like it said because I didn't even think properly and don't have a clue, and I was tired and grumpy. lol. I am such an idiot.

Hey you live and you learn. It was my mistake. I screwed up.

I guess its fate and its a bit funny now I think about it. lol. Lesson learnt. But shame tho. I don't usually get attracted to anyone.

[HeartIsAching]

Heh... Sorry pal. It wasn't over but you were a distrustful, first-class jackass and there's almost no chance you'll recover from this.

[thomasmcguire2]

Is there no resolution couples use or dating people have heard off? It was a misunderstanding. Circumstantial even. Is there any relationships guidance or expert that could ever resolve this? Or have seen it resolved?

Basically there are potentially two people who like each other and have to walk away because of a communication mistake, I came across like that but I'm not like that?

[ihaveaquestion]

Well you could tell her the truth and know that she may or may not give you a second chance. I did something stupid like this once and my sig other did not believe me when I told him my mistake but he and I had a long history and he didn't want to hear my truth.

- - - Updated - - -

He had been bossing me around and I decided I would start standing up for myself but the one time I finally stood up for myself was when he told me I looked so nice that day I should go be a model and I said, "don't tell me what to do!" doh! brain dead.

[smackie9]

I think you are a big fat liar or just in denial. I know this behavior doesn't just "happen", and to blame it on an upset stomach....what are you 12?

[thomasmcguire2]

wow. thats a bit harsh. denial? Like denial that I'm an idiot for this..? I know I messed up. I was in work and felt like I was getting 'windy' and looked up if I could cancel and what would it look like. As I say im no expert on these things. That was actually the reasoning for thinking about the whole thing.. I thought about it, remembered that I and had actually thought 'nah she would be cool about it' and it all just dawned on me like a smack in the face.

[KingZ]

Don't worry, fellow LFers! Backup has arrived!


You, sir, are a huge asshole. Now you're trying to weasel out of it because it just hit you that she might have actually been sick. People like you bring zero value to relationships.

The fact that you're lying to yourself in front of a bunch of anonymous Internet people just shows how insecure and weak you are.

If you want to move forward and do the right thing, leave this girl (and all women) alone until you can figure out how to not be such a colossal scumbag idiot fu​ck.

[Wakeup]

I'm back to dating after a relationship, but I know basic alarm bells. Like if they are interested they never cancel.

Uhm, when they are sick they will cancel and if they are interested they will reschedule which she did but you didn't believe her, pissed her off (understandably) and now she's likely glad she dodged a bullet and is gone for good.

[chinagirl]

You are an insecure idiot. Do all the women a favor, dont date until you grow up.

[hoxtonchris]

i think you are all being a little neive here,this woman said she was sick and would be sleeping all weekend!then reschedules!come on! she had a better offer for the whole weekend and she wanted to keep him dangling so she recheduled.he had a little voice inside that told him that and he reacted.you done the right thing mate

[smackie9]

Old bloody thread!!!! OP is long gone weeks ago.

[IndiReloaded]

There is a little bit more to this.. I may as well be honest..
The funny thing is.. I wasnt being myself, Im not normally like that at all. The opposite in fact, usually the girl has to give me a wee push to show interest. lol.

And This is the weird thing...... I was thinking of canceling because I had a bit of a bubbly tummy. lol.

ROFL. Asshat.

See kids, there IS such a thing as Karma-Klaus.

PS - in case he comes back to whinge how hard we are..

A woman I've been dating and like a lot canceled our date on the day saying she was sick. Pls read the details and see if you can help?

All opinions are welcome. Be brutally honest