does he have any interest in me?

[shim_ca]

Recently I have met a German guy. He is my colleague. Initially he would not talk to me that much. Just always stared at me. But, now a day, he is bit free with me. He is very nice to me always. If I ask him to do something for me, he is happy to do. If I say, for lunch I would not go to office cafeteria, he would say, ‘no problem’; ‘we can go some other place’. He can remember always what I say. He smiles when he sees me, but not in front of others. Even he does not talk too much to me in front of others.

And I have noticed, if I neglect him, he also does the same. he sits in his room alone. so, if i go to his room and talk, he looks happy.

I like this guy. But, I am not sure, if he is really interested in me or he is just friendly to me. How should I get it know?

[basilandthyme]

There's nothing to set him apart from pretty much every colleague I've been friends with . He sounds like a regular work mate to me.

You're asking how you can tell if he's interested. Tell me, what experiences have you had with previous boys/men? How did they express interest?

[smackie9]

Good god just ask him if he would be interested in meeting up after work for a few cocktails.

[shim_ca]

There's nothing to set him apart from pretty much every colleague I've been friends with . He sounds like a regular work mate to me.

You're asking how you can tell if he's interested. Tell me, what experiences have you had with previous boys/men? How did they express interest?

OK. i am from canada and men approached me directly for date overthere. but, i have heard that in germany situation is different. guys give subtle hints. i am new in germany. so bit confused.

[smackie9]

So act like a Candadian and invite him out for a beer.

[haxan]

Germans have always taken what they wanted. It just didn't always work out so well in the end. If he's not initiating any contact with you, he's either not interested, or if he is, socially inept with women.

Either way maybe not the best case scenario for you maybe.

[smackie9]

German or not, there are people who just blow hot and cold. If you want things to happen you have to be assertive and take matters into your own hands and get'r done. Sitting around for a guy to ask you out is silly. It's not the 1950's, it's ok for women to ask men out on dates.

[shim_ca]

German or not, there are people who just blow hot and cold. If you want things to happen you have to be assertive and take matters into your own hands and get'r done. Sitting around for a guy to ask you out is silly. It's not the 1950's, it's ok for women to ask men out on dates.

my colleague is bit shy. that is not my statement, rather one of my colleagues said. i am bit shy too. it’s not that I did not think about what you said. But, if he says NO, then I would feel really offended. now you can call me really 'silly'.

[basilandthyme]

If you're both shy, then nothing is going to happen. Relationships only evolve when one of you has the balls to initiate.

[pcmaster]

He seems to like you in his own special way. You can encourage him by saying you like him first. Some boundaries have to be broken between being friends/lovers. Guy seems to be very careful cause he never failed since he never tried much. Now hes quiet in public because he likes you and if he tries something with you and fails it will make him want to cry since he likes you and everything that happens is super importand.

Give him this link and it will change his life

loveforum.net/threads/85674-Guide-on-interacting-with-girls

[smackie9]

my colleague is bit shy. that is not my statement, rather one of my colleagues said. i am bit shy too. it’s not that I did not think about what you said. But, if he says NO, then I would feel really offended. now you can call me really 'silly'.

Fear of rejection is being silly. Nothing risked is nothing gained.

Offended would mean he verbally insulted you. Being rejected in not an insult it's just part of dating life.

[pcmaster]

OP if you want I can destroy your fear of rejections and encourage you to be more direct. Just say yes and you can ask anything you want to know.

[Exeter19]

talk to him one of your work or lunch breaks, ask what he enjoys doing when outside of work if anything is similar to interests you have say maybe you both could do that one weeknight. are you both very shy? someone has to break the ice.

[shim_ca]

talk to him one of your work or lunch breaks, ask what he enjoys doing when outside of work if anything is similar to interests you have say maybe you both could do that one weeknight. are you both very shy? someone has to break the ice.

actually before i take any step i want to be sure about his feeling. we work in the same office. his room is just in front of my room. I dont want to make any mess.
regarding going outside, he has taken an initiative today; but not only for me; for the whole office. he suggested that we (office colleagues) should go to a concert. later he also said me that last week he went to a concert and he enjoyed it. then he started explaining how brilliant the performance of the artists was.

[pcmaster]

That could be indirect way to ask you on date. Like hoping that together with other mates you will come too. Thats a good sign. Looks like guy dont want to be alone anymore. Like this new exciting thought of doing the ussual things together with someone. Maybe you can add him to your activities. Like share your passions, see how it works out.