does he still find me sexually attractive

[plasticflower1]

Hi
My partner & I are both 43yrs old been together 7yrs known each other for 30yrs we were school sweethearts. We lost touch for many years and refound our love 7 years ago. From the start our sexual relationship was always "full on" we would have some kind of sexual contact at least once a day, we clicked instantly (sexually) could read each others bodies perfectly knew where to touch,when,how long for.
A couple of years into our relationship he suggested SPEED as a way to heightened our sexual experiences ( it worked!!!!!) we were both happy with this. We used speed once a week to enhance our experiences but also continued with our amazing relationship for the other 6 days.
The trap I seem to be in now is that he is only interested in me sexually now when speed is involved. He says I am worrying over nothing,that he is perfectly happy & has no need to go anywhere else for sex. He has said that but has now starting masturbating on his own where he never did before. I am certain of this as I have woken during the night to find him masturbating. I have not let him know that I am awake,I have let him finish. He seems to enjoy his masturbation as much if not more than when we both participate.
Anybody any ideas or suggestions?

[dickriculous]

Sounds like he may have gotten in over his head with the speed and now he's doing it before he beats off. There's no doubt that sex and orgasms are far, far more pleasurable on euphoric drugs than they are without them and a minority of people when they experience this when on things like blow, x, speed, etc they don't want it without them anymore. I wonder if that happened to your bf/lover/whatever you would classify him as? Are there other areas in life where he seems to lack self control? Does he have an addictive personality? Part of this might depend on when he's fapping too, you've mentioned waking up to find him doing it in the bed...seems unlikely that one would do speed and be able to stay in bed for very long so take that into account before you come to any conclusions here.

In any event, does he know how he is making you feel with all of this? Does he know that he is hurting you? If he doesn't know then he needs to be made aware, not with subtle hints and insinuations but with actual communication - that way you are both in a position where you have to make it clear to each other how much you are willing to work with each other through this. If he has been made clearly aware of how this is affecting you and he doesn't demonstrate any sort of willingness to work with you then I would have to call into question what kind of relationship material he really is.

One way or another you need to get on this now and determine based on direct communication with him whether or not you can salvage this. I've been there before where I want sex a lot more than my gf/lover/whoever and believe me, I know how unbearable it is. I've ended relationships for exactly that reason simply because I can't take it, even if she's someone I'm really into and can't get enough of.

[Wakeup]

Hi
My partner & I are both 43yrs old been together 7yrs known each other for 30yrs we were school sweethearts. We lost touch for many years and refound our love 7 years ago. From the start our sexual relationship was always "full on" we would have some kind of sexual contact at least once a day, we clicked instantly (sexually) could read each others bodies perfectly knew where to touch,when,how long for.
A couple of years into our relationship he suggested SPEED as a way to heightened our sexual experiences ( it worked!!!!!) we were both happy with this. We used speed once a week to enhance our experiences but also continued with our amazing relationship for the other 6 days.
The trap I seem to be in now is that he is only interested in me sexually now when speed is involved. He says I am worrying over nothing,that he is perfectly happy & has no need to go anywhere else for sex. He has said that but has now starting masturbating on his own where he never did before. I am certain of this as I have woken during the night to find him masturbating. I have not let him know that I am awake,I have let him finish. He seems to enjoy his masturbation as much if not more than when we both participate.
Anybody any ideas or suggestions?

What is your issue?
That your jealous of him masturbating
That he's addicted to speed (because he is)
That he'd rather rub one out then cum with you?

You don't seem to have your concerns spelled out, really. You seem more concerned that he won't do you unless he's speeding instead of being upset that he's addicted to the shit.

If it were me, I'd be very aware of the fact that he's addicted to speed and that is what will eventually fk up your relationship with him... not the fact that he'll only do you when he's stoned on it.

[KingZ]

Hi
My partner & I are both 43yrs old been together 7yrs known each other for 30yrs we were school sweethearts. We lost touch for many years and refound our love 7 years ago. From the start our sexual relationship was always "full on" we would have some kind of sexual contact at least once a day, we clicked instantly (sexually) could read each others bodies perfectly knew where to touch,when,how long for.
A couple of years into our relationship he suggested SPEED as a way to heightened our sexual experiences ( it worked!!!!!) we were both happy with this. We used speed once a week to enhance our experiences but also continued with our amazing relationship for the other 6 days.
The trap I seem to be in now is that he is only interested in me sexually now when speed is involved. He says I am worrying over nothing,that he is perfectly happy & has no need to go anywhere else for sex. He has said that but has now starting masturbating on his own where he never did before. I am certain of this as I have woken during the night to find him masturbating. I have not let him know that I am awake,I have let him finish. He seems to enjoy his masturbation as much if not more than when we both participate.
Anybody any ideas or suggestions?

Speed expert here. (Source: have been on speed for years; currently on massive amounts of speed and enjoy the shit out of it.)

First of all, what kind of speed are you on? Lisdexamphetamine? Dexamphetamine? Amphetamine sulfate? MDMA?

Secondly, how frequently is he masturbating, and does he use porn? What kind of porn?

[plasticflower1]

We have spoken about it. He assures me that I have nothing to worry about. We only use speed once a week. The masturbating on his own only happens on speed free nights, never before has he used masturbation on his own. He has told me of occasions when he has used masturbation rather than had sex with his ex, but clarified that by saying (i don't need to do that with you). But now that is exactly what he is doing. Addiction is not the issue we take it or leave. Yesterday he was all over me cause he thought we had some speed on order, the supplier let us down. He lost all interest in the sex & was tucked up in bed snoring by 9.00pm. Now it looks like the order is back on for Monday 17/2 so he's all over me again, all touching,fondling,groping,love you darling at any opportunity. He says i am worrying over nothing. How can such a drastic change in sex be worrying over nothing.
He used to follow me up stairs for a quick hand job. Now we are barely in the same room,except to sleep,then he makes sure one of us is asleep first, or he just falls asleep on the sofa.
I have some surgery coming up soon,outcome not certain. When talking about this he says " I will be here for you. I am here for the long haul. We will get through this. I am not going anywhere."
I am so confused.

- - - Updated - - -

Amphetamine. Masturbating 2-3 times a week. No porn.

[plasticflower1]

My issue is the change in our sex life from every night to once every 7-10 nights

- - - Updated - - -

Amphetamine. Masturbating 2-3 times a week,no porn

[Wakeup]

My issue is the change in our sex life from every night to once every 7-10 nights

I would imagine that he's tripping with himself. That way he doesn't have to worry about your pleasure and can concentrate only on his own.

In longterm relationships the sex tends to peter down somewhat as time goes on anyway. That's why it's important to keep your relationship interesting prior to hitting the sack, flirting and seduction tend to also slow down and that too needs to be remembered and continued with.

Regardless of all that, he has (by all accounts) developed an addiction to his choice of drug and when there is an addiction involved, you will not be his first priority.

Kingz has admitted to being addicted to speed, perhaps he can give you an idea about whats going on but keep in mind that, just like everything, not all speeders are alike. You're going to have to have a candid discussion with your particular speed freak to find out what is going on in his particular mind. Lets hope he will be honest with you and not just tell you what he knows you'll want to hear.

Good luck.

[vashti]

Speed expert here. (Source: have been on speed for years; currently on massive amounts of speed and enjoy the shit out of it.)

You dummy. Your mom should have beat you more.

OP - A lot of addicts stop enjoying sex without speed, because artificially enhanced sex is better than natural. Eventually, those who are on it often end up with problems ejaculating.

[KingZ]

^ This. Basically, it doesn't matter. You both need to stop taking amphetamines as soon as possible. They can (and will) ruin your relationship, trust me.

[HeartIsAching]

LMAO... to all of you. OP especially.

[plasticflower1]

Amphetamine. Masturbating 2-3 times a week, no porn

[KingZ]

LMAO... to all of you. OP especially.

I'm no expert, but it seems to me like you've got a muthafu​ckin' problem.