3 years Relationship break?

[mikeopen40]

I am currently 19 years old and have been with my girlfriend for 3 years and she has been my only partner. I feel that i need to experiment with other girls and that i really love this girl and if i get married to her i will feel that i have never been with another girl in my life which is a decision which i will regret. I still love this girl very much but i need a bit of a break just to experiment and get to know how other girls are like. I would like to get in a relationship with this wonderful girl again in he future but im not sure how to approach and ask her for time off in our relationship. What if she doesn't want me back in the future? Will i look selfish if i tell her this is the reason i want a break? I want to tell her the truth...
How do i approach this and if i do successfully take a break should i still be friends with her and how so?
I am really in need of help as i do not want to have been with one girl all of my life as i know it will be a decision i will regret.
p,s she my partner has been with others before me.
Lengthy Responses will be greatly appreciated. Thanks

[isolde.darling]

of course she'll get hurt and in my opinion, it IS unfair for her if you want the set up to be that you'll go out and experiment while she waits. if you're really in love with her, you won't be here wondering what it is you're missing. you'd already know that you have the BEST girl. that's just my two cents.

[michelle23]

This is having your cake and eating it. Its completely selfish to expect her to wait for you while you go and f**k other people. Plus if you did get back together-it would create all sorts of anxiety, trust issues, insecurity, jealousy. Its impossible to get back to the way things were before coz you will both have been with others.

If you break up with her-that's it, its over and there's no going back.

Is your sex life good with this girl?? If yes, I hope you know its hard to find someone your sexually compatable with. The next girl could only want it once a month. The next could just lay their like a dead fish. The next girl could fake it all the time. Etc etc

my bf has only been with 2 before me-only slept with one of them once and the other a handful of times. I have only slept with one other person twice before him and neither of us would dump the other for this reason. We have an amazing sex life-not missing anything plus we both know it would be hard to find someone who makes us this happy again. Were together 5 years, planning a future..

i know your young and I can understand why you want to see what its like with someone else but think about it carefully coz you could throw away ghe best thing thats ever happened to you and when you finally do sleep with someone else-you may be bitterly disapointed. Without the emotional intimacy-sex is awful (it was for me with that guy-a horrible experience)

[michelle23]

Ill add plenty of people have married their first and spent a lifetime together. Happy.. I think thats a really special thing

[surfhb2]

So sex is your only reason? My guess is you're getting more mature and looking for more.....this is good and normal behavior.

Btw.....you are crazy thinking about marriage when you are your age

[mikeopen40]

I have just been feeling these really strong feelings lately that i need a break and follow in my own path.
I think that if she was a virgin and i was her one and only i would take greater comfort in our relationship as i feel that before we take another step in our relationship i need to be on par with her and and feel like i am missing out on something. (as before our relationship she was not a virgin and i was)
How do i approach this and ask for time off? i want to tell her the truth but breaking up to 'experiment' doesn't sound too good
should i wait another week until after Christmas and new years?
Help please
I really love her but these feeling of regret are eating me up. I am only young once to experiment an if later on in the future we do end up separating it would be difficult to experiment in the manner it would be now.

[violet11]

Jesus, dont break up with her before Christmas - what are you thinking???!

Mike, you've got the three year itch. It's normal. Give it some time.

Fwiw, you don't know if your relationship will work out in the long term anyway. You could break up in a year... giving you an undesignated amount of time to experiment with other women Plus, it's tougher to get laid at your age. Sex is much easier to come by once you hit mid twenties.

[michelle23]

Thats just your ego. You dont like the fact she has more experience then you. Its completely normal to have these doubts and thinking the grass is greener 2-3 years in. Most people go through it. Its because the honeymoon period is over and we crave the initial excitement of a new relationship. But that infatuation period is not worth throwing away someone you really love and are truly compatable with.

Lots of people break up for this reason with their first love and then they deeply regret it. A lot of people go searching for someone just like their ex and they could be searching for years and never find what they are looking for coz they didnt realize what they had till its gone.

Your happy with your gf. Happy couples are not supposed to break up. You break up when the relationship becomes unhealthy or dysfunctional or coz you have fallen out of love.

But I doubt you will get over this greener grass syndrome if you stay coz you are young.

If you break up with her, you cannot expect to get back together. Life does not work like that and your relationship will never be the same. Your gonna break her heart, shes gonna lose all trust in you and she will never feel safe with you again. If you get back together again, she will have fear and anxiety that youll leave again and you will lose respect for her if she takes you back so then youll think any time you wana **** someone youll just dump her and it will become an on/off dysfunctional mess.

Unless of course, shes a strong woman and tells you to go f**k yourself which is what I would do. Dump me once and you never get a second chance..

anyway dont tell her your dumping her to experiment. You will break her heart more. Its not fair to do that to her. Just let her go and both of you move on with your lives.

You never ever ask someone to wait for you. Its cruel and selfish

[surfhb2]

16 to 19 year olds are kids. Are they really able to comprehend the amount of commitment, discipline and hard work it takes is in a adult relationship? Generally No

The guys being smart....he's just a kid who wants to find out who he is and what the worlds about.....let him.

[michelle23]

Ya I get that surf. The chances of it lasting forever are slim anyway but if he breaks up with her now, he will likely regret it.

[UKRomantic]

It's all part of life and learning.

You have a tough decision to make, and no one can tell you which is right and wrong.

You may split with this girl, and have the time of your life for the next few years. But it may also backfire, you may struggle to find sex, struggle to find someone else and end up stuck in a rut, all whilst she's moved on and with someone else.