You described this guy as real freak. How retarted you have to be to stick finger in a hole especialy if person said she dont want it.
There is diference between no that means no and no that means maybe.
Guy seems immature. Grabbing breasts. Are you his first girlfriend? Does he have caring side aswell?
You should explain him that sex is a two person thing where both have to be satisfied. Otherwise he can just fck himself.
Maybe even explain what and how you want in order to be willing be touched again. If he still dont change then just dont have sex before he changes behavior. That should help.
Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will